Why Couldn't Mike Say "I Love You" To Eleven?

Warning: contains SPOILERS for Stranger Things 4, Volume 1.

Stranger Things season 4 saw Mike struggle to say "I love you" to Eleven – but why? Stranger Things 4 split the Hawkins crew across the world, with Joyce taking her kids out to California to start a new life, Hopper stuck in a Russian prison, and the rest of the group remaining in Hawkins. The latest season of Stranger Things takes place throughout spring break, with Mike going to visit the Byers family over in California.

Though Mike’s arrival is met with much enthusiasm, there’s an underlying tension between Mike and Eleven as well. It turns out that Eleven has been lying to Mike about how wonderful her life has been in California, lies which unravel as soon as El’s bullies show up at the roller rink they’ve just arrived at. Though the couple has been keeping in touch by writing each other letters, it’s clear that the distance between them has made it hard for them to be honest with one another. Eleven feels she has to lie to Mike to keep up appearances - one reason some have speculated that Eleven should break up with Mike - and Mike has been finding it hard to express his feelings for her.

Long-distance relationships can be difficult, especially for two teenagers who have been through the wringer and were used to spending so much time together. Though Mike’s actions throughout Stranger Things’ previous seasons have always indicated how much he cares for Eleven – he nearly gave his life to protect her in season 1, he called her every day on the radio for a year in season 2 – he’s always had more trouble telling El exactly how he feels, instead generally showing this by his actions instead. This is arguably why Mike couldn't say "I love you" to Eleven despite the pair's bond. It is also often said that children learn by example - which would explain why Mike isn't able to express his feelings directly, when his own parents have set such a bad precedent.

Stranger Things season 4 Mike and Eleven

Ted and Karen Wheeler have an arguably loveless marriage. Nancy even comments on it in Stranger Things season 1 when she’s speaking to Jonathan, saying that her parents’ relationship was the easy and expected route for them to take. Throughout four seasons, Ted and Karen display almost no signs of affection for one another, and Ted often criticizes his wife and puts her down for no reason. It was bad enough for Karen to briefly consider having an affair in Stranger Things season 3. Though Karen, especially, loves her children – Ted is a bit more ambivalent in this regard – their love for one another is seemingly non-existent. Nancy has been affected by this example in the past as well, as Nancy continued her relationship with Steve because it was the easy thing to do - but Mike, though he’s been in a loving relationship the whole time, has never seen a couple tell each other how they truly feel. He’s a kid with a lot of emotions that he never learned how to express with words or say something as vulnerable as "I love you", and thus expresses his feelings with actions instead.

The difference between Eleven and Mike is clear. Though Eleven grew up in an abusive environment without any examples of genuine love, that only made her more eager for affection and love and equally willing to provide it in return. Mike, on the other hand, did experience love growing up, from his parents, his friends, and his siblings. His issue isn’t that he can’t love, but that he doesn’t realize how important it can be for some people to hear that declaration, especially for someone with a story like Eleven. If his parents are still together after all these years, despite never really expressing their affection for one another, it makes sense Mike doesn't understand how badly his inability to tell Eleven that he loves her is hurting her feelings, nor that doing so would be both normal and healthy.

Saying “I love you” for the first time is a big deal, especially for a teenager who has never had a truly healthy relationship to look up to. Mike’s parents haven’t set the most loving example for him and his siblings. Hopefully, when Mike and the Byers brothers manage to find Eleven and rescue her in the Stranger Things season 4, volume 2 story, he’ll finally be able to utter the words she so longs to hear.

Next: Stranger Things 4 Revealed Its Best Spinoff (& It's Not What You Expect)

Stranger Things season 4, volume 2 drops July 1 on Netflix.

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