In its eight-season run, The Vampire Diaries introduced several impressionable villains, but none of them managed to come close to the iconic Klaus Mikaelson. From the moment he entered the show in season 2 to the moment he left for The Originals spinoff, Klaus was continuously raising the stakes and keeping things interesting.
When it comes to snarky one-liners and creative threats, no one does it as well as Klaus. During his short stay in the show, he delivered some of the funniest quotes and many of them are hilariously meme-worthy.
Dealing With Frustrating Allies
"What do you want from me? A secret brotherhood handshake?"
Considering their long history of betrayal and conflict, it’s no surprise that the alliance between Klaus and Stefan in season 4 was riddled with suspicion and mistrust. As Stefan questions Klaus about his intentions once again, Klaus grows frustrated with him and asks him what else he expects him to do to prove that he could be trusted.
He sarcastically suggests a "secret brotherhood handshake" and this line summarises their relationship perfectly, as their constant banter became one of the funniest running jokes of The Vampire Diaries.
Enjoying The Drama
“But just between us girls, who would you have picked?”
Despite being over 1,000 years old, Klaus could never pass on the chance to revel in the teenage drama that flooded Mystic Falls. He was fascinated by the love triangle between the Salvatore brothers and Elena, and he never tried to hide the fact that he was rooting for Stefan.
As he was draining Elena's blood, he was clearly disappointed that he wouldn't get to see the end of her love story with the Salvatores. He just couldn't help asking her which of the brother she would've picked if she had the chance.
Message Received
"For future reference, one voicemail is just as effective as nine.”
Nobody likes to be swamped with phone calls and having their voicemail filled with messages, and neither does Klaus. When he broke the hybrid curse, he gained the ability to heal vampires from werewolf venom with his blood. Ever since then, every character that had a run-in with a werewolf was rushing to him for a cure.
When Elena was poisoned with werewolf venom, Stefan was desperately trying to get a hold of Klaus, who wasn't very happy about the several phones calls interrupting his day.
Being A Bad Influence
"I invited him to the party, love. He's the one dancing at the table"
Many people have that one friend who goes a bit overboard with their drinking sometimes. Granted, they're probably drinking alcohol instead of human blood, but either way, they tend to put a damper on the party. When Klaus found out that Elena didn't die during the ritual that broke his curse, he realized that Stefan had been lying to him the entire time and that made him vengeful.
He compelled Stefan to feed on some students in front of Elena, who watched in disbelief, and blamed Klaus for doing this to him. But Klaus points out that he only told Stefan to feed, not to relish in his victims' deaths, as that was a result of Stefan's inability to control his bloodlust.
When Things Go Wrong
"I blame mind-numbing incompetence, but pointing fingers isn’t gonna help me.”
Klaus is well accustomed to getting what he wants as his strategic scheming and planning have always proved effective. But when it comes to cooperating with others and having to rely on them to get things done, he tends to be severely disappointed with their failures.
When he left Mystic Falls to retrieve the hunter's sword, he put his hybrids in charge of keeping Connor in captivity. However, Connor escaped with ease, due to his warden's incompetence, which left Klaus having to ask Stefan to clean up the mess.
Changing The Plan
"I'm taking artistic license.”
Klaus has many great personality traits, but patience isn't one of them, especially when he's dealing with incompetent allies. He's always ready to stir away from the original plan and take as many shortcuts as he can, to make sure that he gets what he wants as fast as possible.
In order to find the cure, Jeremy had to complete the hunter's mark by killing vampires and he was taking his time. But as Klaus wanted to speed up the process, he turned a few dozen locals into vampires and threatened to hurt Matt if Jeremy refused to kill them.
Ignoring Guilt
"What you're feeling is the remnant of a guilty conscience, I need you to get over it, okay?"
Klaus is not exactly known for his integrity and he's not above dragging others into his malevolent plans. He prides himself on his inability to feel remorse and expects his hybrids to do the same.
After Stefan kidnaped the daggered Mikaelsons, Klaus was livid and he was willing to threaten and murder everyone in Mystic Falls to get his family back. He almost killed Alaric to send a message and Tyler was appalled at the part he had to play in his scheme. What followed was a patronizing speech from Klaus about the insignificance of humans compared to the supernatural.
Coping With Sarcasm
"Well, I'm glad you're finding my misery so amusing."
Even though Caroline and Klaus were never a couple, the chemistry between them was undeniable and the two of them easily became the best ship of The Vampire Diaries. Because of his feelings for her, Caroline was the only one who could get away with teasing the usually hotheaded hybrid.
After Silas stabbed him with the white oak stake and left a piece of it on his back, Klaus turned to Caroline for help. As she was already angry with him for threatening Tyler, she didn't hesitate to make jokes out of his misery, and she was able to get away with it with only a sarcastic reply.
A Vilain's Chores
"Actually, not to nitpick, but we, evil villains usually use minions to pick up our dry cleaning.”
Each season of The Vampire Diaries has at least one iconic villain that wreaks havoc in Mystic Falls and brings chaos into the characters' lives. But one has to wonder what other things those villains do to fill up their day.
That's exactly what Caroline was wondering out loud when they were searching for clues about Silas' plans. She was trying to guess things that would make up his "villain to do list" and she sarcastically listed picking up dry cleaning. But Klaus, ever so proud of his villain status, was quick to let her know that chores like that are left for minions to take care of.
Manipulation And Temptation
"You can call it a deal with the devil if you like."
A deal with Klaus could very well resemble a deal with the devil. When it comes to manipulation, Klaus has centuries of experience and knows exactly how to push on people's weaknesses to get what he wants from them.
Klaus had his own agenda for wanting the cure, but he couldn't set his plan in motion on his own because he was missing valuable information that Rebekah would never share with him. He needed to recruit a useful ally to learn her secret and Stefan was the perfect candidate. Klaus knew that the promise of a cure for Elena's vampirism was too big for Stefan to pass along and he didn't hesitate to make him a tempting offer.