The Umbrella Academy: 10 Best Klaus Hargreeves Quotes

The Umbrella Academy: Robert Sheehan as Klaus

Airing its 10-episode first season on Netflix in February, The Umbrella Academy has seen exceptional success. The series is based on the Dark Horse graphic novels series by the same name which was written and created by Gerard Way. Bringing the comics to life proved to be the way to go, as the Netflix series was pretty much an instant hit.

The Umbrella Academy is the story of a dysfunctional family of superheroes, and the characters were a hit with the audience from the beginning. This is a big reason why The Umbrella Academy has seen such triumph, as the characters are most definitely the selling point. Klaus Hargreeves is perhaps the most quotable character on this series. The lovable junkie who has the power to see and interact with the dead is what Chandler Bing was to Friends and what Daryl Dixon is to The Walking Dead. Klaus Hargreeves is the underdog in his family, and though his goofy, nonchalant attitude often gets on his siblings' nerves, viewers absolutely love him.

Let's explore some of Klaus Hargreeves' most memorable one-liners.

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10 "Drop Dead!"

The Umbrella Academy Season 1 Ben Justin H Min

One of the most intriguing dynamics that TUA has to offer is that of the relationship between brothers Ben and Klaus. Ben Hargreeves is the only deceased sibling, and is sorely missed by everyone... except Klaus, who is able to see him all the time.

Throughout the first season, Ben serves as a voice of reason for Klaus. As a result, these two have many touching, beautiful moments, and also many hilarious moments. One notable interaction was when the brothers were arguing, and Klaus snapped at Ben "drop dead!", which was obviously a ridiculous thing to say since Ben was, of course, already dead.

9 "You are depriving some village of their idiot."

Klaus endures some traumatic heartache when he accidentally time travels back to the 60s and into the Vietnam War. It would be logical for Klaus to immediately attempt to find his way back to his own time, but something keeps him in Vietnam. That is, someone—and that someone is Dave.

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Though viewers don't get to see a lot of Klaus and Dave's romance, they are shown enough for this whole storyline to be heartbreaking. After Dave's death, Klaus returns home and suffers from severe PTSD. So he visits a veteran bar, staring with sadness and nostalgia at an old photograph that includes Dave and himself. This incenses the other veterans, who attempt to kick Klaus out. It's then that Klaus shouts one of his most memorable lines: "I'd like to apologize... that you are depriving some village of their idiot!".

8 "He's dead! Yay!"

The Umbrella Academy - Klaus

In the series premiere and one of Klaus' very first scenes, he makes quite an impression. Allison finds him rummaging through their dad's stuff looking for valuables to pawn for drug money. Allison is humored by this, and when Klaus notices her, he awkwardly tries to take attention away from what he was doing. Klaus goes on to muse about what a terrible man their father was, much to Allison's amusement. Hilariously, Klaus exclaims "he's dead, yay!", being completely unashamed in hiding his true feelings about their father.

7 "Dad, could you stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment?"

The Umbrella Academy - Reginald Hargreeves

In one of the most disturbing sequences on The Umbrella Academy, Klaus goes into a very creepy purgatory-like version of the afterlife and has a strange conversation with his dad. But before this, Klaus considered using his power to reach out to Reginald to be an impossible task.

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His sibling attempt to convince him to at least try, but Klaus stubbornly refuses. He, of course, tries to bring humour to the whole situation—one of his most lovable qualities—and says, "I can't just call Dad in the afterlife and be like, 'Dad, could you just stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment and take a quick call?'".

6 "Best. Funeral. Ever."

Though Reginald Hargreeves was a pretty horrible man, his family attempted to hold a decent funeral in his honor. They tried, but the whole thing ultimately wound up being a disaster. The Hargreeves siblings, understandably, couldn't look past all of the terrible things their father had done, so the funeral was really just a dysfunctional mess that ended with Ben's memorable statue getting ruined in the midst of all the fighting. The event was a disaster, which prompted Klaus to sarcastically comment, "best. funeral. ever.".

5 "I'm just gonna go murder mom, I'll be right back."

After Reginald's death, the Hargreeves siblings' "mother"—or Reginald's robot maid Grace—began acting very strange. This sparked a debate among the siblings regarding what they should do with Grace since she could potentially be dangerous. Before they realize that their mother could be a suspect in their father's murder, the Hargreeves siblings begin to suspect each other. Everyone is obviously offended by the accusations being thrown around, especially Klaus, who sarcastically bites back with, "I'm just gonna go murder Mom, I'll be right back".

4 "You used to think I was an idiot."

Due to his problem with drugs, his inability to take anything seriously, and his joking, goofy demeanor, Klaus has endured quite a lot of disrespect from his siblings. They often look down on him and think of him as being useless.

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It's very humorous when Klaus says to Diego, "you used to think I was an idiot", and Diego responds with, "I still do". But this is also very sad, as Klaus deserves to be taken seriously and treated as equal by his siblings.

3 "I have to pee..."

The Umbrella Academy - Klaus in the Bathtub

One of the funniest Klaus moments in season 1 was when he convinced Diego to tie him to a chair. Klaus wanted this because he was attempting to conjure up Dave, but didn't want his inevitable itch for drugs to get in his way since, to utilize his power, he has to be sober.

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Diego spends quite some time intricately tying Klaus to a chair in a way that will ensure he won't be able to escape. At the end of all this, when Diego goes to leave the run, Klaus cries, "Wait! I have to pee!"

2 "Today, he punched me in the face."

Another hilarious interaction between Klaus and Ben was when Ben was trying to convince his brother to stay sober and help his siblings by using his powers. This results in an argument between Klaus and Ben, and, in the end, Klaus pretends that Ben has won, only to yell, "Psych!" and toss a handful of pills into his mouth.

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Angered by his brother's obnoxious little trick, Ben reacts quickly and punches Klaus in the face. The pills fly out of Klaus' mouth with the impact, and the brothers look at each other in astonishment by the fact that Ben, a ghost, managed to make physical contact with Klaus. Later on, the Hargreeves are having a discussion regarding their plan to stop the apocalypse. Klaus offers up his help and his powers. Reasoning that Ben is able to make physical contact now, Klaus says, "today, he punched me in the face".

1 "You guys are scarier without the masks."

The Umbrella Academy Hazel and Cha Cha

When time-traveler assassins Hazel and Cha Cha arrived at the Hargreeves mansion, they had one mission: to kill Five. But this mission quickly went off the rails when the assassins had to deal with the rest of the Hargreeves family.

During the whole debacle, Klaus remains oblivious and dances around the house wearing headphones and a towel while his siblings fight the assassins. But Hazel and Cha Cha ultimately end up capturing Klaus and taking him back to their hotel room where they interrogate him for answers on Five's whereabouts. Klaus refuses to crack and hilariously seems to actually enjoy some of the ordeal. He infuriates Hazel and Cha Cha in many ways, especially when he sees them without their masks and comments, "you guys are scarier without the masks".

NEXT: What To Expect From The Umbrella Academy Season 2

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