Of everyone in The Vampire Diaries, nobody is as critical as Bonnie Bennett. The residents of Mystic Falls rely on her magic to help them on a near-daily basis – and without her, they would've fallen at every supernatural obstacle.
But saving the day comes with a lot of personal sacrifices. While her friends experience their own share of grief, it feels like Bonnie suffers the most, but doesn't receive the same attention for her losses as Elena Gilbert does. Over the course of the show's eight seasons, Bonnie experiences trauma after trauma – not just from her enemies, but her friends, too.
Her mother getting turned into a vampire
Bonnie was mostly raised by her Grams, after her mother – Abby – abandoned her as a child. In season three, Bonnie tracks her down for help opening one of Klaus' coffins, only to discover she left Mystic Falls after losing her magic to protect Elena from Mikael.
This is a huge blow, especially when she discovers Abby's made her own makeshift family in the meantime. Just as they start to reconnect, Stefan and Damon turn Abby into a vampire so Esther can't use her magic. It's a huge betrayal – especially considering how reluctant Bonnie has been to trust vampires in the past. Not for the first time, her friends don't prioritize her emotions the way they should, and Bonnie loses her mother all over again.
Becoming the anchor to the Other Side
There's a price to pay when Bonnie brings Jeremy back to life, and that price is her life. Thankfully, her friends manage to bring her back. But there's a catch: she replaces Amara as the Anchor to the Other Side.
Anything is worth it to be able to see her friends once again, but it comes with huge downsides. Every time a supernatural being passes to the other side, they have to pass through the Anchor, causing Bonnie excruciating pain. Considering how much high-stakes drama happens between vampires, werewolves, and witches, this is relentless. Even though this ceases once the Other Side collapses, it's still a scarring experience.
Taking on the role of the Huntress
Bonnie dies multiple times throughout TVD, but her friends manage to save her when the Armory's magic suppression pills slowly start to kill her. As always, this comes with a price. By transferring Rayna's last life to Bonnie, she becomes the new huntress – possessing her with an overwhelming desire to kill vampires.
Considering that she has multiple vampire friends, not to mention a vampire boyfriend in Enzo, this is a huge problem. She comes within inches of murdering Enzo at one point, but Damon thankfully eradicates the curse just in time. Without his intervention, Bonnie could've killed all those she holds most dear.
Elena's sleeping curse
Bonnie and Elena have been best friends since childhood. Although their friendship has its ups and downs, one thing that never changes is that they would both die for the other. Eventually, Kai Parker makes it so that might just be the case.
With an ironclad spell, he manages to put Elena under a sleeping curse that will only break when Bonnie dies. In essence, Bonnie will never get to see Elena again, and has to live with the knowledge that she is the only thing keeping her best friend, Damon, from the love of his life. Thankfully, she manages to attain enough power to eventually undo the curse, but not without years of thinking they're separated forever.
Silas killing Jeremy
Bonnie and Jeremy aren't the most popular couple in The Vampire Diaries – mainly due to the lack of chemistry and the fact that Jeremy cheated on her with an actual ghost. But that doesn't make Bonnie's heartbreak over his death any easier to watch. On the search for the Cure, Jeremy has his neck snapped by Silas, leaving her nearly as devastated as Elena.
Her grief drives her to experiment more with darker kinds of magic, such as expression. Ordinarily, Bonnie would never even consider committing a massacre for a spell, but Silas manipulates her pain to convince her. She ends up using multiple forms of magic to bring Jeremy back, but (as usual) ends up fronting the cost herself by dying in his place. Most upsetting of all, her friends don't realize for months – she gets Jeremy to cover it up just to save them the upset.
Getting trapped in the prison world with Kai
Just one season after she died the first time, Bonnie is left on the Other Side with Damon when it collapses. This sends them both to a Prison World where they meet Kai Parker, a Gemini Twin who butchered the majority of his family and plans to escape to finish the deed.
This Prison World is bearable for Bonnie when Damon's there, as they actually bond and end up becoming best friends – perhaps even closer than Bonnie and Elena. But when she sends Damon back alone, she's left vulnerable to Kai. During their time trapped together, he strangles, drugs, kidnaps, and stabs her. As usual, Bonnie puts everyone else first when she throws away one of her chances to escape just to make sure Kai doesn't, proving yet again how selfless she is.
Her Grams' sacrifice
After her mother abandoned her, Bonnie's biggest role model is her Grams, Sheila Bennett. The pair are extremely close. It's Sheila who first introduces her to life as a witch. She teaches Bonnie her first spells, and is a huge influence on her morals and principles.
However, later in season one, she helps Bonnie perform a spell to open the tomb beneath Fell's Church, in which several vampires were imprisoned in 1864. This proves to be too much for Sheila, and she passes away later that day. Bonnie's devastation makes for a truly heartbreaking scene. Thanks to magic, Sheila is still there for her on multiple occasions from the afterlife, but this loss really shapes Bonnie as a person, giving her a natural disdain for vampires.
Her father's murder
Although Bonnie's father Rudy doesn't understand her supernatural life, the pair are still close. In season four, he steps up to become mayor of Mystic Falls after Carol Lockwood's death, and cites Bonnie as one of his main reasons for wanting to protect the town.
However, taking the position is what eventually leads to his own demise. Despite not wanting any part of the supernatural world, he's killed by Silas at the end of summer party. Bonnie – who, unbeknownst to him, is dead at the time but can still see what's going on in town – is forced to watch as Silas slits Rudy's throat. It's a truly gruesome death and would've been terrible enough even if she could help. But for Bonnie, who's so used to being able to save people, to have to stand by is devastating.
Losing Enzo
It's hard to picture Bonnie and Enzo together when he first appears in the show. His murderous actions seem to represent everything Bonnie hates about vampires, and they never share much screen-time. By season seven's flash-forwards, however, Bonnie and Enzo have been in a relationship for three years – one that's loving, devoted, and surprisingly un-toxic for TVD. That is, until Stefan kills Enzo while his humanity's off.
Bonnie is beyond devastated. Her grief drives her to unconsciously tether herself to Enzo's spirit, determined not to lose him. While she ultimately lets him go so he can find peace – and there is the promise that they'll get to see each other again one day – it seems cruel that Bonnie, who has suffered so much for her friends, lost out so needlessly on her happy ending.
Being born a Bennett witch
Although her powers come and go, Bonnie is by far the most powerful witch in the show. Destroying hell, desiccating Klaus, and banishing Kai are just a few of her many impressive feats.
But there's no denying that being born a witch – especially a Bennett witch – is the cause of most, if not all, of her trauma. Bonnie's friends rely on her to pull them from the worst situations, and rarely consider the toll it'll take on her. And Bennett witches are relied upon more than anyone – they're known to be a particularly powerful bloodline, making them the go-to solution for any problem. Bonnie may have been a regular person without being born a Bennett, but at least she wouldn't have been treated as everyone's magic wand.