James Gunn's The Suicide Squad features a sprawling cast of unforgettable characters, each one with a defined and fully-fledged personality. This lot is unapologetically amoral and ruthless (most of them, at least), but they have enough nuance in their characterization to make audiences root for them while still being entertaining to watch.
It would be easy to think that, should the Squad attend Hogwarts, they'd all be Slytherins. That's where bad guys supposedly go, according to canon. However, this group is far more complex than that, and while some would go to the serpent's house, others would feel more at home with the lion or the eagle, and a couple might even find themselves with the badger.
Amanda Waller - Slytherin
Academy Award winner Viola Davis plays Amanda Waller to perfection. Cunning, resourceful, ambitious, selfish, power-hungry, and restless, there's no line Waller won't cross to get what she wants. Had she been a wizard at the time of the war, she would've definitely been on Voldemort's side, ensuring the magical community's might.
She would feel right at home in Slytherin because she embodies the house's worst instincts. After graduation, she would have a promising career at the Ministry's Department of Magical Law Enforcement. Her reputation would make her a favorite of the Minister, although everyone else would fear her.
Captain Boomerang - Slytherin
Jai Courtney's Captain Boomerang doesn't get much screen time in The Suicide Squad. However, both DC and DCEU fans are already familiar with his unhinged take on the Australian thief George Harkness. He is more of a liability than an asset for the Squad, and he knows it.
Harkness loves causing trouble. He is unreliable and chaotic and could jeopardize an entire mission and have no problem with it. Because he is so self-serving and deceptive, the Sorting Hat would send Harkness to Slytherin without so much as a second thought.
King Shark - Hufflepuff
King Shark became an instant fan favorite as soon as the first trailer for The Suicide Squad debuted. Comic book fans might know King Shark as a ferocious and untamed shark-hybrid man, but the movie's Nanaue is a surprisingly kind and misunderstood creature struggling to exist in a world that lives in constant fear of him.
Once he's shown some kindness, King Shark reveals himself to be vulnerable and love-starved. There's no doubt this gentle being would fit right in Hufflepuff House. The students and teachers would have to find a way to satiate his voracious appetite, though.
The Thinker - Ravenclaw
The Harry Potter books are very anti-Slytherin, constantly portraying it as the home of everything wrong with the Wizarding World. However, Ravenclaw also has its fair share of unlikable members and some blatantly negative qualities, mainly their overwhelming ambition and complete disregard for those they consider unintelligent.
The Thinker, The Suicide Squad's secondary antagonist, played by The Doctor himself, Peter Capaldi, is a Ravenclaw at heart. He doesn't care how many people suffer in the pursuit of knowledge and is willing to pay any price to get it. He truly is the embodiment of Ravenclaw's motto: "Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure."
Polka-Dot Man - Hufflepuff
Underrated character actor David Dastmalchian's take on Polka-Dot Man is one of the most intriguing and compelling in The Suicide Squad. The character is a failed experiment who harbors complex unresolved issues with his mother. James Gunn and Dastmalchian portray Polka-Dot Man as a tragic figure who struggles to find his place in the world, making him an ideal fit for the Squad.
It's clear that Polka-Dot Man doesn't enjoy killing and isn't a supervillain per se. He also reveals his gentle side throughout the movie on multiple occasions. Should he find himself at Hogwarts, the Sorting Hat would see his selfless qualities and send him to the badger's house.
Ratcatcher 2 - Hufflepuff
In a lot of ways, Ratcatcher 2 is the heart of The Suicide Squad. The film features some pretty amoral characters, but Daniela Melchior's Cleo Cazo isn't one of them. She's just a young woman wanting to survive in the world and doing the best she can with what she has.
Surprisingly, her greatest power is her faith in others. Cleo is a Hufflepuff through and through and a proud one indeed. She doesn't consider kindness or empathy a flaw and uses them to her benefit, coming out stronger because of it. In a world of cruelty and darkness, she is a source of incandescent light, and that's refreshing in a movie like The Suicide Squad.
Rick Flag - Gryffindor
Joel Kinnaman gets a chance at redemption after the much-maligned Suicide Squad, and he makes the most of it. As the surprisingly wholesome Colonel Rick Flag, Kinnaman gets to show the best aspects of the character. He plays Flag as a natural-born leader, a guide, and mentor for the lost souls under his command.
Flag is The Suicide Squad's moral compass, the closest thing it has to a traditional hero. Rick is a Gryffindor to the bone: brave, daring, loyal, and slightly hot-headed. He never leaves a team member behind and inspires those under his command to follow suit. He knows the difference between right and wrong and knows where he wants to be.
Peacemaker - Slytherin
For all terms and purposes, John Cena's Peacemaker is The Suicide Squad's villain, even more than Starro. In his own words, Peacemaker cherishes peace so much he doesn't care how many men, women, and children he kills to get it. That's a Slytherin mindset if there ever was one.
Peacemaker's willingness to do anything to achieve his goal makes him the ideal member of the serpent's house. He has the ruthlessness that Slytherins value so much and the determination to use it. In his eyes, Peacemaker is doing what's necessary, giving him a curious sense of delusion that's also characteristic of Slytherin. Fans of the character will see more of him once the upcoming Peacemaker show premieres on HBO Max.
Bloodsport - Gryffindor
Robert DuBois, played by the ever underrated Idris Elba, is not a perfect fit with any of the houses. He has the ruthless and resourceful mindset of a Slytherin, that's true. However, he also has the bravery and loyalty of a Gryffindor and perhaps even a touch of Hufflepuff. The Hat would probably struggle more than with any other of the Squad's members.
In the end, Bloodsport is still a Gryffindor. His leadership instincts might make him a prime candidate for Slytherin, but his resistance and chivalry in the face of danger are undeniable Gryffindor traits. Bloodsport would never turn his back on a city in danger, and that makes all the difference.
Harley Quinn - Griffindor
If there's a casting choice that the DCEU absolutely nailed, it's Margot Robbie as Harley Quinn. Throughout her journey in the DCEU, Robbie has maintained a clear sense of understanding the character. In The Suicide Squad, Harley gets thrown into a wild situation surrounded by a new group of people, resulting in a more vulnerable and less chaotic take on the character.
The Suicide Squad, like Birds of Prey before it, continues to explore Harley's heroic side. She's not a hero and will never be one, but that doesn't mean she can't do heroic things. Harley remains reckless and bold, a question mark in the group. She is fire personified, wild and unyielding, capable of saving and destroying. Gryffindor house needs to get ready because Harley is coming, and she's simply the best.