Although Michael Scott is a fan-favorite character on The Office, many fans will agree that he isn't without his flaws. Despite being the branch manager, Michael is quite the buffoon and often annoys his employees with belligerent behavior, offensive remarks, and a general naivety (which is usually him trying to sound smarter than he actually is).
Unfortunately, Michael has a penchant for bungling popular sayings and pieces of pop culture. In an attempt to sound smarter and more enlightened, he only appears more awkward. And even though it's painful for his employees, it often makes for hilarious viewing.
"I Am Going To Drop A Deuce On Everybody."
Perhaps Michael's most disgusting bungling comes in the season 2 episode, "Casino Night." In this episode, Michael is rather impressed with his ability to find two dates (both Carol and Jan), and he believes that everyone else will be impressed as well.
Unfortunately, he completely bungles a common saying while expressing his excitement. What he means is "I'm going to drop a bomb on everybody," meaning to surprise people. However, he ends up stating, rather grotesquely, that he is going to defecate on everybody.
"Ah, The Progidal...My Son Returns."
This quote from the season 3 episode, "The Convention," proves that Michael has no idea what he's talking about - he just likes to spout clever-sounding things he has heard in movies. "The prodigal son" is an idiom that refers to someone who has been humbled by a failed venture outside the family or organization and returns with hopes of forgiveness. In this case, Michael is referring to Jim, who left Scranton to pursue a career in Stamford.
For one thing, Jim wouldn't be a "prodigal son," because he is actually quite successful in Stamford and isn't returning to Michael with newfound humility. For another, Michael can't even complete the common saying "My prodigal son returns," bumbling both the sentence and the word "prodigal."
"Find Out If There Are Any Skeletons In His Attic."
Michael Scott is one of the most jealous characters on The Office. Not only does he take Jim's departure personally, but he hates that Josh is running a more successful branch than his own. To hopefully sabotage Josh, Michael orders Dwight to "find out if there are any skeletons in his attic."
Here, Michael is bungling the common saying "Skeletons in their closet," which is an idiom meaning "to find dirt on someone" and ruin their reputation.
"Fool Me Once, Strike One. Fool Me Twice...Strike Three."
Season 3's "Traveling Salesmen" contains what could very well be his dumbest misquote. Michael is tricked by Andy, believing that Dwight went to New York City to see Jan. An angry and betrayed Michael then states to the camera, "Fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice, strike three."
Michael is hilariously mixing metaphors here, blending the saying, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me" with the common "strikes one, two, and three" metaphor. This one is especially funny owing to the break between "fool me twice" and "strike three." Michael knows he ruined the saying, but he's too committed to the theme to back down.
"They're Trying To Make Me An Escape Goat."
One of the few times in which The Office fans felt kind of sorry for Michael Scott, season 3's "Product Recall" sees him running around and attempting to fix a PR disaster that was no fault of his own. Michael defends his honor in a goofy "apology video" (complete with an American flag made from taped-together pieces of paper) stating, "They're trying to make me an escape goat."
He obviously means, "They're trying to make me a scapegoat," meaning someone who publicly takes the blame for something that wasn't their fault.
"'You Talkin' To Me? You Talkin' To Me?' Raging Bull, Pacino."
Michael is an avid movie lover and amateur filmmaker, resulting in lots of hilarious video projects being included on The Office. However, he still manages to bungle one of the most famous movie quotes of all time. After returning from the fight with Dwight, a confident Michael utters the famous "You talkin' to me?" line from Taxi Driver before attributing it to Raging Bull and Al Pacino.
This is a mistake of epic proportions. As stated, the famous line is from Taxi Driver, not Raging Bull. Furthermore, the line is spoken by Robert De Niro, not Al Pacino. Even worse, Al Pacino isn't even in Raging Bull.
"Forgiveness Is Next To Godliness."
Despite being a buffoon, Michael generally means well. He feels bad after hitting Meredith with his car (as anyone should), and he visits her inside the hospital ("Fun Run"). While there, he pleads with Meredith for forgiveness, telling her that the Bible states "Forgiveness is next to Godliness."
There are two things wrong here. For one, the actual saying is "cleanliness is next to Godliness," which is correctly pointed out by Angela. Secondly, according to phrases.org.uk, that proverb is not actually from the Bible. In fact, it was first uttered by a preacher named John Wesley in the late 18th century - long after the Bible had been written.
"It's Got Sort Of An Oaky Afterbirth."
Michael loves to sound smarter than he actually is, and that also applies when he's describing the rich details of wine. In "The Dinner Party," while attempting to explain the complexities of his dinner wine, Michael says that it has "sort of an oaky afterbirth."
He means "oaky aftertaste," which sounds like something a wine aficionado would say since wine is often aged in oak casks.
"Business Is A Doggy Dog World."
Michael can actually provide some good business advice on The Office, and he's shown to be a very talented salesman. He clearly knows a thing or two about the industry, which is why he claims to the camera that "business is a doggy dog world" ("Prince Family Paper").
Of course, he actually means "dog eat dog world," which refers to an industry full of selfish people who will betray and backstab each other to attain success. This is actually quite a common misquote, and it's certainly not exclusive to the unique blunderings of Michael Scott.
"No Rest For The Sick."
"Stress Relief" is often heralded as one of the funniest episodes of the series, and it contains a brilliant bit involving CPR training. Michael tries getting Stanley to volunteer, but Phyllis opposes the idea, telling Michael, "He needs to rest."
In response, Michael states, "No rest for the sick." He's likely trying to say either "No rest for the wicked" or "No rest for the weary," both of which are quite common sayings. Instead, he only ends up making no sense at all.