Martin Scorsese is notorious for his gang-related films. The Departed is amongst these, placed in the gang world of 'southie' in Boston, Massachusetts. The Departed is a critically acclaimed and widely beloved film.
Beloved may seem like an odd term to use for a violent, high-suspense gang film, but particularly for people from the area, it hits close to home. Scorsese does well in hitting the accents, atmosphere, and unique brand of humor from the rougher side of the state's capital. Here are ten of the movie's most quotable lines.
You Do Good In School? I Did Too. They Call That A Paradox.
Frank says this line to Matt Damon's character, Colin, when he's still a little boy. Frank is in the process of taking Colin under his wing and asks him about his life. Colin confirms that he is indeed good in school, and Frank imparts one of his many casually philosophical comments--both of them do well in the system, yet both of them will exist as rejects from the system.
What Is This, A Citizen's Arrest? Blow Me.
Even as his life is possibly on the line, Colin expresses himself with the typical brand of Bostonian stubborn humor. These characters never miss a chance to sneak in a sarcastic one-liner at the expense of the person annoying or threatening them. Billy has made it clear that he has the advantage over Colin, and Colin's response is to do his best to offend him while he has the chance.
Go Save A Kitten In A Tree Ya F*cken...
While this quote didn't exactly age well, the general sentiment of it remains enjoyable--stated in a scene where the firemen have beaten the police in a game.
The fact of the matter is that at the time--and likely into today--the scenes and types of people this film deals with do speak a certain way and adopt a certain brand of humor. While we might switch out some of the language, the humor remains hilarious.
This Is America. You Make No Money You're A F*ckin' D**chebag.
Mr. French makes this declaration while beating a man senseless who can't pay up what he owes. The man pleads with him, saying he simply has no money to offer. Mr. French is unimpressed and unsympathetic, asserting the reality of capitalist America which makes anyone who doesn't have money near to completely powerless. It's not asserted as how he thinks it should be--merely how it is.
What Are You Drinking? "Cranberry Juice"
In one of the earlier scenes with Billy he is inexplicably drinking cranberry juice at a bar, knowing that he is surrounded by serious gang members. He goes on to share this fact with two people who happen to ask him what he's drinking. We never have any idea why it is he does this--perhaps for comic value, or a slight comment on ideas of masculinity in such crowds.
I Don't Want To Be A Product Of My Environment. I Want My Environment To Be A Product Of Me.
This is one of the first lines said in the film, from the lips of Frank Costello. It feels empowering at the time, introducing Frank as a character to be, if not admired, respected to some extent.
He's a man who wants to take control of his own destiny--an underdog, pushed down by the system of society and forced to exist on the outskirts. But as the movie unravels, we begin to wonder what kind of environment it is that he wants to produce and if it's worth our respect.
How's Your Mother? "She's On Her Way Out" We All Are. Act Accordingly.
Frank drops yet again another bomb of wisdom. Much of the time he is quoting other people, and sometimes it's hard to know when, unless one watches the movie while constantly taking note or searching online (and nobody likes the person who does that). In this scene, Frank tells a man at a bar, who shares that his mother is dying, that we should all act as if we were dying because we are--a carpe diem, of sorts.
Geez. She Fell Funny.
One of the more bizarre moments of humor in the movie, Frank makes this remark after shooting a man, then a woman, in the head. The woman leans forward and collapses across the man at an angle instead of falling forward as he did. Frank is put off by how she fell, or maybe amused.
I Want To Smoke, Want To Smoke? You Don't Smoke Do You? What Are You One Of Those Fitness Freaks? Go F*ck Yaself.
Perhaps one of the funniest moments in the film, this is also a moment of top-quality acting and comedic timing for Alec Baldwin. This comment comes straight out of nowhere and at breakneck speed, so fast you can hardly tell what he's said before it's past and he's left. The crassness and sense of a person having an entire conversation with themselves in the span of a few seconds is classic Bostonian.
Maybe. Maybe Not. Maybe Go F*ck Yaself.
It's difficult to out-do a Bostonian when it comes to swearing, and Mark Wahlberg's character tops them all. His bluntness, colorful curses and general couldn't-care-less attitude is in your face and uncomfortable, but also grants a few of the funniest and most iconic lines from the film, this being possibly the most memorable and regularly repeated, stated to someone who didn't even ask anything remotely offensive, of course.