With Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen and G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra out in theaters this summer, toy-lovers everywhere have been wondering, “Which of our favorite childhood toys is next for a big-screen adaptation?” Well, one enterprising Internet user has done the hard work of gathering up all the teaser trailers for some upcoming toy movies that are being helmed by some of Hollywood’s biggest directors.

Thanks to Atom.com user “Dan Meth”, we now have our first looks at Care Bears vs. My Little Pony (CB vs. MLP), David Cronenberg’s Cabbage Patch Kids, Wes Anderson’s Teddy Ruxpin, Peter Jackson’s Smurfs, the Play-Doh Fun Factory movie (a Ron Howard film), John Carpenter’s Alf and David Lynch’s enigmatic new film, Koosh Ball.

Check out the teaser trailers for your favorite toy-turned-movie:

Personally, I’m most excited for Cronenberg’s Cabbage Patch Kids and Carpenter’s take on Alf. I’ve always been creeped-out by the whole notion of babies grown like vegetable spuds – or a hairy psychotic alien with an insatiable hunger for cat flesh. How these “toys” ever ended up as treasured childhood items is an answer that still escapes me. Children just love some weird @#$% I guess…

This new crop of toy films will join the long list of other upcoming toy movies such as Stretch Armstrong, Hot Wheels, Candyland, Battleship and even a film based on Bazooka Joe Bubble Gum. Hell, it’s like FAO Schwartz has seized control of Hollywood!

(Can you tell yet that this is all a joke? No? Then consider yourself slow on the uptake.)

Thanks to “Dan Meth” for the wonderfully funny video. Satire at its best. What I love the most is: I could really see each of those directors taking a cherished toy in that kind of cinematic direction. David Lynch’s Koosh Ball…Brilliant!

You can check out more toy-inspired spoofery by going here. Let us know how you enjoyed the video.

Source: Dan Meth

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