When it was first announced that Marvel had negotiated the rights to use the Spider-Man character in the MCU from Sony, a lot of people’s reactions were: “Ugh, do we really need another Spider-Man? In the past few years, we’ve had Tobey Maguire as Spider-Man and Andrew Garfield as Spider-Man. Do we really need to get someone else to play Spider-Man?”
However, those critics were quickly silenced when Tom Holland brought the manic, nervous, frazzled, jokey energy of Peter Parker and his web-slinging alter ego to the big screen (and carried his own solo movie a year later). Here are the 10 Most Memorable Quotes From Tom Holland’s Spider-Man.
10 “You’re a criminal! Bye, Mr. Criminal!”
Donald Glover has really made a name for himself in the past few years. He was always known for being the rapper Childish Gambino and for playing Troy in Community, but in the last couple of years, he’s been showing the full range of his talent. That included a small role as Aaron Davis in Spider-Man: Homecoming, a guy wrapped up in Adrian Toomes’ alien weapons business, who Spidey interrogates after web-shooting his hands to the trunk of his car following his grocery shop. Spidey leaves, saying, “That’s going to dissolve in two hours.” Davis says, “No. No, no! You’re going to fix this!” Spidey says, “Two hours! You deserve that!” Davis pleads: “I’ve got ice cream!” Spidey says, “You’re a criminal! Bye, Mr. Criminal!”
9 “That thing does not obey the laws of physics at all.”
One of the main characteristics of Spider-Man – and particularly Tom Holland’s incarnation of Spider-Man – is his penchant to point out anything in the Marvel universe that seems silly. A perfect example of this is when he sees Captain America’s shield bouncing around, hitting people and smashing things, and says, “That thing does not obey the laws of physics at all.” And he’s right, it doesn’t. It bounces off human beings when he flings it at them, and yet it can break through concrete walls. The simplest explanation of this is that it obeys the comic book laws of physics, which is essentially: it doesn’t need to be explained as long as there’s minimal blood in a movie kids are watching.
8 “Where are you from, kid?” “Queens.” “Brooklyn.”
The MCU always finds time for little character moments like this in its big action sequences. It’s part of what keeps them grounded in the movie’s reality and stops them from getting boring like the DCEU’s slo-mo-fests. While DC’s sequences have a lot of visual flair and action and no personality, Marvel imbues its action sequences with personality by throwing in little exchanges like this.
Captain America and Spider-Man are on separate sides of the battle at the airport in Captain America: Civil War, but they still manage to connect as born-and-raised New Yorkers for one brief moment, and that sort of thing makes a huge impact.
7 “I helped this old lady and she bought me a churro. So, that was nice.”
The first act of Spider-Man: Homecoming catches us up with Peter Parker after he returns from Berlin, where we saw him battle Captain America and everyone else with anti-Sokovia Accords views, and eagerly awaits his next mission. He keeps leaving missed calls and texts for Tony Stark and his bodyguard Happy Hogan and getting no reply. One of his first daily reports in the movie goes like this: “Mr. Stark, here’s my report for tonight. I stopped a grand theft bicycle. Oh, I helped this old lady and she bought me a churro. So, that was nice. I just feel like I could be doing more.”
6 “Wait a minute, you guys aren’t the real Avengers! I can tell. Hulk gives it away.”
One of the neatest little touches in the MCU is when the street-level characters refer to the world-saving cosmic characters. For example, in Spider-Man: Homecoming, the Avengers are referred to as celebrities. Peter’s classmates play “Kiss/Marry/Kill” with the Avengers and Spidey foils a robbery being carried out by a bunch of thugs concealing their identities with Avengers masks. Perhaps Spider-Man’s most defining trait in the comics is that he jokes about the dangerous situations he finds himself in. He doesn’t overtly speak to the audience like Deadpool, but it does have that element of winking at the audience – and Tom Holland has carried that into the MCU beautifully.
5 “Look, kid, there’s a lot going on here that you don’t understand.”
“Stark said you’d say that.”
Captain America: Civil War might not have been classified as an Avengers movie, and was officially one of Captain America’s solo movies, but it did a better job of bringing the characters together and utilizing the ensemble cast and furthering everyone’s narrative journeys than Avengers: Age of Ultron did. This little exchange – in which Cap tells Spidey, “Look, kid, there’s a lot going on here that you don’t understand,” and Peter simply replies, “Stark said you’d say that” – says a lot about all three characters involved: Cap is trying to talk Peter out of fighting so he doesn’t have to fight a kid, Peter is blindly following Tony’s lead, and Tony knows Cap well enough to predict what he’s going to say.
4 “Just a typical homecoming – on the outside of an invisible jet, fighting my girlfriend’s dad.”
Spider-Man often makes little meta jokes like this. It’s like the superhero equivalent of John McClane’s “Come out to the coast, we’ll get together, have a few laughs!” soliloquy. It helps to ground a situation in reality if the character talks about how crazy it is. What makes the Spider-Man character so relatable is that, yes, he doesn’t have “a typical homecoming,” but until he’s called upon to take flight in a final battle against his arch nemesis, it is a typical homecoming. He’s a high school student, just like anybody else. He lives in a little apartment in Queens with his aunt, he has a crush on a girl at his school – the only thing separating him from every other high school kid is the superpowers.
3 “But I’m nothing without this suit!”
“If you’re nothing without this suit, then you shouldn’t have it.”
We rarely see Tony Stark get serious, but when he does, Robert Downey, Jr. plays it very well. When he’s mad at Peter Parker after the ferry sequence in Spider-Man: Homecoming, we see him get very stern and fatherly for the first time in their pseudo father-son relationship.
To teach Peter a lesson about disobeying him and taking matters into his own hands, Tony tells him, “I’m going to need the suit back.” Then, heartbroken, Peter cries out, “But I’m nothing without this suit!” and Tony says, “If you’re nothing without this suit, then you shouldn’t have it,” before dropping the mic.
2 “Mr. Stark, I don’t feel so good.”
This quote is particularly memorable, because it’s the centerpiece of possibly the most heartbreaking scene in Avengers: Infinity War. A lot of the characters who disappeared when Thanos snapped his fingers just said a quippy one-liner and vanished, but not Spider-Man. According to the DVD commentary, Spider-Man’s ‘death’ scene was actually supposed to be much shorter. However, while they were filming it, the Russo brothers realized it could be dragged out a little if Tom Holland and Robert Downey, Jr. leaned into the drama of the scene. And that’s when Holland improvised some of the most powerful acting ever seen in the MCU.
1 “I’m Peter, by the way.”
“Oh, we’re using our made-up names. I’m Spider-Man then.”
Since Peter Parker is just a 15-year-old kid, he can take on the role of starstruck fanboy when he’s around people like Tony Stark and Stephen Strange. He also gets himself in and out of trouble by talking too much, which is something Tom Holland has taken from the comics and adapted in hilarious ways for his own acting style. The ridiculousness of Doctor Strange’s name had been pointed out in pretty much every one of his MCU appearances prior to Infinity War, but it was fun to see Spidey bluntly reference the heroes’ “made-up names” in such a blasé manner.