Focusing on the minutiae of daily life, Seinfeld took on various aspects of mundane human existence. It tackled friendship, dating, marriage, parents – but arguably, above all, being a show about four single thirtysomethings living in New York, its strongest focus was on the characters’ work lives.
While Jerry retained his standup career for all nine seasons and Kramer’s source of income remained a mystery, George and Elaine jumped from job to job every couple of seasons. Elaine was better at holding down a job and keeping up with office politics than George, so he had more jobs than her. So, here are All Of George Costanza’s Jobs, Ranked.
Parking Cars
“These pretzels are making me thirsty!!” The guy who parked cars on Jerry and Kramer’s street went on vacation, and since George was out of work, he decided to take the guy’s business while he was gone.
However, he found it to be far too stressful, basically losing his mind as he spent his days surrounded by honking traffic. It was even worse for George than the regular guy, because George took the job as a new Woody Allen movie started shooting just a block over, so the traffic got even worse and the street was even busier than usual.
Sales Rep In Charge Of The Penske File
This one wasn’t even a real job. The interviewer left in the middle of the interview, so George just showed up on Monday and said he was the new guy. They gave him his own office and “the Penske file,” but since he had no idea what his job would be or who Penske was, he did nothing for a full week before the guy who interviewed him came back, confused that he was there.
All he’d done in a whole week was transfer the Penske file into an accordion-style folder and attend a fellow employee’s birthday party (he even gave a speech at the latter).
Play Now
When George was first hired at Play Now, a playground equipment manufacturer, he was walking on a limp with a cane. The interviewer gave him the job because he thought he was disabled, and he ended up getting special treatment – they gave him his own office, he got a mobility scooter, and he was literally carried around the office. When they found out he was lying, they tried to fire him.
However, since he had a one-year contract with the company, they couldn’t. So, he came into the office every day and did nothing as the employees all tried and failed to get him to willingly quit.
Computer Salesman For Frank
When Frank Costanza watched the movie The Net, he got the idea to open a business called “Costanza and Son.” He bought a bunch of computers that he planned to sell over the phone out of his garage. He hired George (the “son” in Costanza and Son) and Lloyd Braun (the guy that George’s mother often compared him to – “Why can’t you be more like Lloyd Braun?”) to be his salesmen.
Lloyd continuously outsold George until it was revealed that he’d been making up his sales and Frank was forced to shut down the business before it had taken off.
Kruger Industrial Smoothing
The ninth and final season of Seinfeld is far from adored by fans, but one of the silver linings of the show’s farewell installment is Mr. Kruger, George’s negligent boss at Kruger Industrial Smoothing.
He was insanely incompetent – he’d take the rest of the day off if he locked himself out of his office, he gave a ton of the company’s money to a made-up charity fabricated by George, and it was a mystery how his company managed to stay afloat for so long. Mr. Kruger was the guy who assigned George the nickname “Bobo” when he was trying to get “T-Bone.”
Real Estate Agent
In the first couple of seasons of Seinfeld, before George became known for bouncing from job to job and being unable to hold down a regular source of income, he had quite an affluent career as a real estate agent. He had a sharp eye for the marketplace and was up-to-date and how the industry was doing.
This job was also used for storylines, like in the episode “The Robbery,” in which he offers a great new place to Jerry and Elaine hopes to take his apartment when he moves out to get away from her annoying roommate. When he quit, he tried to go back in the following Monday like it never happened.
Reader At Pendant Publishing
When George was out of work, Elaine managed to get him an interview at Pendant Publishing, the publishing house where she used to work. Like Elaine, George’s job at the company involved reading manuscripts. He somehow managed to get the job, despite never reading a book in his life beyond the ones he was forced to read in high school.
The only reading he’d done as an adult was the sports section of the newspaper. Still, he aced the interview and got the job. However, as soon as he’d been hired, he got himself fired for sleeping with the cleaning woman on his desk when he was working overtime.
Sitcom Writer For NBC
The fourth season of Seinfeld got meta when NBC executives approached Jerry after a show and asked him if he’d be interested in developing a sitcom for them. He teamed up with George to write a pilot for “a show about nothing.”
Despite having no idea and no experience, they managed to get the pilot picked up by the network. George passed on the offer in an attempt to negotiate for a higher salary, but he barely managed to scrape the deal back with a lot of groveling and a lower salary. Unfortunately, the pilot wasn’t picked up to series, but for a while, George had a job he was proud of.
Hand Model
In the season 5 episode “The Puffy Shirt,” George was forced by unemployment and a lack of funds to move back in with his parents in Queens. With no job prospects, he ran into a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity when a talent scout spotted his hands and promised to get him work as a hand model.
In Kramer’s own words, George’s hands are “smooth, creamy, delicate, yet masculine,” and it seemed as though his prayers had been answered and he was on his way to the top. Then, he made fun of the puffy shirt and the designer pushed his hands onto a burning iron.
Assistant To The Traveling Secretary For The New York Yankees
“Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio, Mantle...Costanza?” In the season 5 finale “The Opposite,” George decided to go with the opposite of all of his instincts. It landed him a date with a woman whose uncle worked for the New York Yankees and could set him up for a job interview.
He was up for the role of Assistant to the Traveling Secretary, working under then-team owner George Steinbrenner. By following the opposite of his instincts, he managed to land the job – his dream job, working for his favorite baseball team – and kept it for a few seasons, longer than he’s had any other job.