Groundbreaking for its time, Sex and the City saw Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda have some wild adventures on their quest for love and great sex in NYC — and there are more to come with And Just Like That..., a SATC reboot airing on HBO Max this fall. But the original show was full of iconic moments featuring the core four, from Berger's Post-it note to Carrie getting her happily ever after with Mr. Big in Paris.
The women experience such dramatic character growth, it can be easy to forget every little situation and choice that shaped them into who they became. But it's these little, quieter moments that prove just how fabulous Carrie and co. are.
Carrie Wins The War On Shoes
After Carrie is forced to take off her Manolo Blahniks at her friend Kyra's baby shower, things get awkward when the shoes go missing. Kyra refuses to refund Carrie the whole amount because she doesn't think she should have to pay for her "extravagant lifestyle." Insulted and shoe-shamed, Carrie stands up for a woman's right to shoes by telling Kyra she's getting married to herself and is registered at Manolo Blahnik. Kyra replaces the shoes.
As friends get older and their lives take different turns, it can be easy to drift apart. And that's okay, but what isn't is one friend demeaning another for not making the same choices they have. When money gets involved, that can make things twice as uncomfortable. It would have been easy for Carrie to accept Kyra's insufficient cheque and drown her frustrations in cosmopolitans. But Carrie doesn't fold under Kyra's reductive comments. She does have a real life and she would rather fill it with designer shoes than babies.
Samantha Babysits Brady
While Samantha is shamelessly fabulous, it is a little inconsiderate of her to brag about her luxurious lifestyle over lunch when Miranda is clearly having a tough time as a single mom. It only takes a brief chat with Carrie for Samantha to realize she should be a better friend. She shows up at Miranda's door unannounced, gifts Miranda her hair appointment, and even offers to babysit Brady.
There is huge pressure for female friends to babysit each other's kids, and the simple fact is that not everybody wants to — and that's okay. Samantha was under no obligation to look after Brady; it would have been enough to treat Miranda to a manicure sometime. But when Samantha does anything, it's always full throttle, and that includes friendship. She braves one-on-one time with little Brady and when his magic vibrating chair breaks down, she is able to save the day in the most Samantha Jones way possible.
Charlotte Calls Samantha After She And Trey Have Sex
Sexually frustrated over Trey's bedroom difficulties, Charlotte gets annoyed with Samantha's graphic story about her latest partner. The two women have an argument and Charlotte seeks refuge in her old sorority sisters. But when they look down on her for confiding in them about her desires, Charlotte realizes maybe there's more Samantha in her than she thought. Charlotte goes to Trey and they finally, albeit briefly, make love. Afterward, Charlotte calls Samantha and tells her what happened.
Most arguments get overheated by both parties refusing to see the other's perspective, and that's exactly what happens with Charlotte and Samantha. But Charlotte is eventually able to recognize that just because Samantha's approach to sex is different from hers doesn't make it dirty or wrong. Beyond that, what makes this moment is so sweet is that because of Charlotte's revelation, there's nobody she wants to share her news with more than Samantha.
Miranda Stands Up For Herself At Work
Miranda prides herself on having a successful career. She logs long hours at the firm but finds it difficult to keep up with her current workload and raising Brady mostly on her own. When she gets called into a meeting to discuss her declining performance, rather than promise she'll do better and work harder, Miranda agrees that her current work situation isn't feasible and insists on reducing her hours.
Discussions like this can be terrifying, even for a badass like Miranda. Unfortunately, there's a ton of pressure to sacrifice self-care to work harder. And well before the term "self-love" became popular, Miranda knows that the only way she can be the best for everyone — including her firm — is to work a number of hours reasonable to her situation. Miranda is a fan-favorite character because of her success, so she deserves more credit for standing up for herself in the workplace.
Carrie Tells Charlotte To Celebrate Her Wedding The Way She Wants
Charlotte is ecstatic when Harry proposes, but her mood quickly sours when she spots her first wedding dress. Because this is her second time, Charlotte feels inappropriate throwing a big to-do and tells her friends this wedding will be low-key. But Carrie can tell this isn't what her friend really wants and in a heart-to-heart at a dive bar, she encourages Charlotte to get married however she wishes.
Carrie has many moments of selfishness throughout the series — including earlier in the same episode, when she covers Charlotte's engagement ring with Berger's breakup note because she insists that's a bigger deal. So, it's a testament to Carrie's emotional intelligence that she can tell Charlotte's insistence on having a small wedding is insincere. And it's an even bigger deal that Carrie takes time out of her big "I'm getting over Berger" night to focus on someone other than herself. "The Post-It Always Rings Twice" is one of Sex and the City's most iconic episodes, but this scene is often overshadowed.
Samantha Cries During Miranda's Mom's Funeral
When Miranda's mother dies on Sex and the City, Carrie and Charlotte are heartbroken for her while Samantha seems callous and indifferent. Her best attempt at condolence is telling Miranda, "You look great." But at the service, surrounded by crying people, something in Samantha breaks. She mouths "I'm sorry" to Miranda before bursting into tears herself.
As passionate a woman as Samantha is, there are some emotions she is petrified of, and sadness is a big one. She wants life to be a big, sexy party and when confronted with mortality and death, it scares her. Samantha's most remembered emotional moments are her cancer reveal and telling Smith what he means to her, but this scene is every bit as poignant. She allows herself to experience grief, and in doing so, she's also able to comfort her friend.
Everything Charlotte Does Regarding Carrie's Loan
Carrie's inability to save money comes to bite her when she learns she must buy her apartment from Aidan if she wants to keep living there. Samantha and Miranda are quick to offer their help while Charlotte sips her drink and avoids eye contact. Though Carrie has no intention of borrowing money from her friends, she's angry about Charlotte's silence and confronts her about it. Charlotte insists that money and friends don't mix and it's not up to her to fix Carrie's financial woes. But Charlotte soon has a change of heart and tells Carrie she will loan her the money she gets from selling her engagement ring.
In both her friendships and romantic relationships, Charlotte is a people-pleaser, so she really deserves more credit here. There is absolutely nothing wrong with Charlotte not wanting to foot the bill for Carrie's expenditure, and she's right to tell Carrie that this situation is not her responsibility. But what makes this even better is that Charlotte changing her mind has nothing to do with Carrie's bullying — she wants to move on from her life with Trey, and what better way to do that than by helping out a friend?
Carrie Admits She Judged Samantha
When Samantha graciously offers her PR services to Carrie for her book cover photoshoot, Carrie stops by Samantha's office, only to find her friend performing oral sex on the Worldwide Express guy. Shocked, Carrie runs out. Later, she cracks jokes to her friends at Samantha's expense, and at the photoshoot, Carrie judges the outfit Samantha has picked out and claims that she would never do what Samantha did. But after realizing she's been very insulting to a friend doing her a huge favor, Carrie apologizes and admits she was judgmental.
Carrie often gets raked over the coals for being a terrible friend, even though she does just as many good things for the ladies as bad. But what's even bigger than a kind gesture is an apology and admitting wrongdoing. Also, while all the women love Samantha, it's rare that they vocally celebrate her liberal approach to sex, so it was very heartwarming for Carrie to tell Samantha how much she admires her ability to put herself out there.
The Women Stand Up For Miranda In Atlantic City
When the women take an impromptu trip to Atlantic City, Miranda feels self-conscious about her baby weight. A boorish man hurls a fat-shaming comment at her at a casino table and while Miranda just wants to ignore him, her friends aren't having anything of it. They all chime in and expose the guy for the jerk that he is, prompting eavesdroppers to give them a round of applause.
For as revolutionary as Sex and the City was for its discussions of female sexuality, it didn't say a ton about body image. Not only is it fantastic that Miranda is given this very relatable storyline, but it is such a stand-up-and-cheer moment when her friends rally around her. Sex and the City is celebrated for its depiction of female friendship, so this moment really deserves to be more iconic.
Miranda "Walks" Charlotte Home
Charlotte is having difficulty conceiving a child with Trey, and things become even more tumultuous when Miranda announces she is unexpectedly pregnant with Steve's baby. Charlotte runs into Miranda after her fertility appointment where she tearfully shares that it's unlikely she will be able to have kids. She insists she wants to be alone on her walk home and Miranda gives her her space, but still silently walks behind her.
It is always challenging when a friend is going through a rough time and insists they want to be left alone. In this situation, Miranda wants to be there for Charlotte but also respect her space and desires. Most of Sex and the City's deep friendship scenes involve Carrie, but this one stands out because the protagonist has nothing to do with it. As if Miranda wasn't awesome enough, here she literally has her friend's back.