10 Roswell Characters Sorted Into Hogwarts Houses

Before Roswell, New Mexico premiered this year, a different version of the story existed 20 years earlier. In the late 90s, Roswell debuted on the WB, inspired by the Roswell High book series developed at the same time. 

The series followed a group of teenagers in the New Mexico town as they discovered that not everyone who lived there was completely human. Main characters Max, Isabel, Michael, and Tess were alien-human hybrids hidden on Earth to keep them safe from the enemies of their home planet. Humans Liz, Maria, Alex, and Kyle learned their secret and became their allies.

Secrets and hiding in plain sight might lead the audience to believe this group would have been a shoe-in for the Harry Potter Hogwarts house of Slytherin. While that might be true for some of them who are more sly and ambitious than others, the rest fit in elsewhere. The brave leaders would be sorted into Gryffindor. Logical and curious individuals wind up in Ravenclaw. The loyal and hardworking in Hufflepuff.

10 of the main characters from the original Roswell series have been sorted into their respective Hogwarts houses.

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Roswell Isabel Evans Slytherin
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10 Isabel Evans: Slytherin

Roswell Isabel Evans Slytherin

Isabel Evans always thought Roswell, New Mexico was beneath her. She was a top student, padded her college resume with plenty of extracurriculars, and she had one very big secret: her alien DNA. 

Keeping a secret for most of her life meant Isabel was very good at pulling the wool over people’s eyes. In fact, she was much better at hiding things than her brother was. Her preference for dating older guys, and her constant lookout for a ticket out of Roswell, made her a definite Slytherin.

9 Jesse Ramirez: Ravenclaw

Introduced in season three, Jesse worked for a law firm. That law firm happened to be the same one where Mr. Evans was a lawyer. Jesse also dated, and married, Isabel over the course of the season.

Unlike most of Isabel’s friends, Jesse was quick to figure out that something wasn’t quite normal with her peer group. He couldn’t put it all together without all of the facts, but if the show hadn’t been in its final season, perhaps the writers would have made him a little more investigative. As it is, the audience knows Jesse’s got to have a pretty good brain since he became a lawyer so young, making him a Ravenclaw.

8 Kyle Valenti: Hufflepuff

Roswell Kyle Valenti Hufflepuff

Kyle began his time on the show as Liz’s jealous boyfriend. When she thought they were just casual, Kyle thought they were serious. The misunderstanding led to Kyle following Liz and getting himself into a little trouble. That might seem a bit Slytherin-esque, but Kyle wasn’t particularly good at it. 

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Instead, Kyle’s misguided actions came from his desire to protect someone he cared about, an early sign of him being a Hufflepuff in the series. Despite Kyle’s rocky start to the series, he became a very loyal member of the alien-human group. He thought of Tess as his sister and protected her from his former football friends. Kyle also never gave up anyone’s secret.

7 Alex Whitman: Ravenclaw

Roswell Alex Whitman Ravenclaw

Like so many of the supporting players in the Roswell series, Alex Whitman was a loyal friend who wasn’t afraid of putting in a little extra hard work. He came this close to being a Hufflepuff. In addition to being a good student and a stargazer, Alex was also in a band. Alex also had to make time to help save the day. He knew how to manage his time. The sorting hat lands Alex in Ravenclaw thanks mostly to one major plot point for him: he decoded an alien language.

Tess used her mind-warping skills on Alex. Though he didn’t remember doing it, Alex spent a lot of time figuring out the text of an alien book. That’s quite a feat for a highschooler. In addition to his skills in code and languages, Alex was also proficient with a computer. He managed to get into one belonging to an FBI agent.

6 Jim Valenti: Gryffindor

Roswell Jim Valenti Gryffindor

Like his son, Jim Valenti had a rocky start on the series. Suspicious of everyone and on the hunt for aliens himself, he was a bit of an antagonist for the main teens. Of course, he eventually became an ally, and the sorting hat places him firmly in Gryffindor.

Valenti had a very clear sense of right and wrong in the series. He was all about justice and protection. It’s only natural that he was the town sheriff. Once he learned the truth that he spent so long trying desperately to uncover, he repeatedly placed himself between the teenagers and the danger that followed them. 

5 Tess Harding: Slytherin

Roswell Tess Harding Slytherin

Tess lied to everyone she met the moment she set foot in Roswell. She weaseled her way into the group of friends because she, too, was an alien-human hybrid. What she didn’t tell them was that she was actually there to make sure she delivered a royal baby to another race of aliens on their home planet.

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To be fair to Tess, she was only completing a deal made long before she was born. Her sneaky skills meant that she was able to fool everyone into believing she was just one of the gang. Her entire story revolved around surviving to fight another day. She was a Slytherin just looking for a way to keep going.

4 Michael Guerin: Hufflepuff

Roswell Michael Guerin Hufflepuff

When Max, Michael, and Isabel were found wandering around in the desert as kids, Max and Isabel ended up adopted by the Evans family. Michael, on the other hand, was separated from the only people he knew and wound up in foster care. Despite a bit of jealousy over that fact for the next decade, Michael stuck by Max and Isabel.

Even when Michael and Max had their differences, Michael always came back to the guy who would be king. He didn’t just think of Max as a friend, but as family. That sense of loyalty extended to Isabel, Maria, Liz, and Alex over time. Michael also eventually became an emancipated minor and worked to support himself. Loyal and hard-working? Sounds like the perfect Hufflepuff.

3 Maria Deluca: Hufflepuff

Roswell Maria Deluca Hufflepuff

A second banana, AKA a sidekick, is the person who sticks by the main character no matter what. That’s exactly who Maria Deluca was for Liz Parker in Roswell. Nothing could shake their friendship. That’s why she’s a Hufflepuff through and through.

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The reveal that there were actual aliens in Roswell shook Maria, to be sure. That didn’t stop her from agreeing to lie to the sheriff, pretend to be healed by an alien during the middle of a festival, and take road trips across the west to find answers for her alien associates. There was just about nothing she wouldn’t do for her friends. 

2 Max Evans: Gryffindor

Roswell Max Evans Gryffindor

Though Max didn’t find out about his royal heritage until well into the series run, he was always a natural leader. Max, despite having a real need to keep a big secret, wasn’t a very good liar, and he wasn’t exactly good at sneaking around. That rules out a Slytherin house for him. He also often came to the wrong conclusions during investigations, so that rules out a Ravenclaw sorting as well.

Instead, his penchant for saving people, which kicked off the whole series, makes him a lock for Gryffindor. Max always wanted to do what he saw as the right thing. That meant he saved Liz’s life, let Tess leave the planet pregnant with his son, and took on the Skins despite the danger. He constantly put himself in danger to keep everyone else safe.

1 Liz Parker: Ravenclaw

Roswell Liz Parker Ravenclaw

Yes, Liz did a lot of brave things during the course of the series. She also showed her loyalty to her alien friends on numerous occasions. Deep down though, Liz wasn’t motivated by a quest for justice or her need to be brave in the face of difficult odds. Instead, Liz needs to understand motivated her.

Liz’s first love was really science. She wanted to know how the world worked. In fact, before befriending a group of alien-human hybrids, she wanted to become a molecular biologist. Liz’s science initially made her suspect Max was different. Liz was also the one most likely to follow clues and use logic to figure out who was after her friends. She’s most definitely a Ravenclaw.

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