The hit CW series loosely based on the Archie Comics – Riverdale – has been an overwhelming success. From the unexpected yet wildly successful Jughead and Betty relationship to the popularity of some previously lesser-known characters like Toni Topaz and Kevin Keller, we are constantly being surprised by the likability of the characters, the interesting twists and turns of the plot, and the incredibly beautiful scenes and settings where the show takes place.
Everyone loves a good crime ridden and possibly supernatural small town teen drama. This is the kind of television that keeps people coming back week after week.
Yet Riverdale continues to go down a path of ridiculousness. Sure, we’ll keep watching. Of course we will. But the more a person watches the show, the more they’ll find themselves shaking their heads, questioning the choices of the writers and the producers.
What better way to exemplify our bewilderment than a good old meme? There is really no better way to illustrate our concern over the “Harchie” relationship, Archie’s generally questionable life choices, and some of the show’s seriously gaping plot holes. Really, a meme says it all.
Read on for the 25 Memes That Prove Riverdale Doesn’t Make Sense Anymore.
The Physical Appearance Of "Teenagers"
Don’t you remember when you were in tenth grade and you had just had your braces removed and you were feeling pretty good about yourself in terms of your appearance?
Nowadays, sadly, a teenager needs more than straight teeth to keep up society’s beauty standards.
As in most teen dramas, we just have to question how realistic the age of the characters in Riverdale are. These are students in high school; either sophomores or juniors. Yet they look like they could be in their mid-twenties (which is the age range of the actual actors).
With a full face of makeup and perfectly done hair each day, along with a well-executed wardrobe, these are surely not the teenagers we thought we knew.
Obviously this is a Hollywood smash hit television series – but, still, are they not going to even try to make these actors look like actual teenagers?
Archie’s Questionable Priorities
Archie, Archie, Archie.
Since day one, we’ve had some issues with Archie. Between flitting from one girl to the next, and then from one passion project to another passion project, and then all of a sudden giving it all up for Hiram Lodge, we’ve had just about enough of Archie’s clueless and irritating tactics by this point.
Archie went from being a somewhat annoying bro in season 1 to becoming a total jerk in season 2.
Case in point: he breaks up with Veronica because she’s not ready to say that she loves him. While on their break, Archie kisses Betty. Archie proceeds to become a Mafioso’s henchman, and as far as we’ve seen, has completely bailed on his dad in favor of the more flashy Hiram Lodge.
As if we needed more ammunition to dislike Archie, season 2 has only increased our disdain.
Jellybean’s Lack Of Appearance On The Show So Far
We’ve heard mention of Jellybean so many times on the show so far, but we have yet to actually see her appear.
Why in the heck haven’t the producers and writers decided to insert Jellybean into the storyline yet? It could be that they have been waiting for season 3, as a way to introduce an important yet so far untouched character, just as they did with Chic in season 2. But what if it’s that they haven’t been able to find a suitable actor for the part, yet?
We have just the answer: Dylan Sprouse! Clearly, the boys have dressed in female apparel in the past, and we are sure Cole’s twin brother, Dylan, can take one for the team this time around!
Veronica’s Daddy Issues
Riverdale started off as essentially a show about Veronica obsessing over her father’s wrong-doings. Anytime anything ever occurred on the show, Veronica had an uncanny way of finding that it could somehow have something to do with her dad, Hiram Lodge. Clearly, as we have seen in season 2, she was not wrong.
However, what does boggle the mind is how Veronica has done a complete 180 – from hating her dad and feeling confused and pinning all negative Riverdale occurrences on him – to becoming a full-fledged part of his family business.
Unless Ronnie has some sort of behind-the-scenes plan in terms of usurping her father or having him jailed, we must say we’re confused by how quickly she’s come to his side after so recently rejecting his illegal and immoral business practices.
Jughead’s Self-Perceived Weirdness
Let’s get real. Jughead is really not all that unique when it comes down to it. He wears a beanie and rides a motorcycle and writes moody prose.
He encompasses essentially every moody, punk teenage boy from every teen drama ever.
Apparently for Jughead, being the moody punk outcast is the absolute weirdest thing he could possibly be. Indeed, Jughead believes he is “weird” and is a “weirdo” and “doesn’t fit in."
Where did Jughead get such an idea that he was so weird? Why does he think he’s so different from every outcast character he has most likely read about in his moody books and seen in his moody films and television shows?
We are particularly confused because Jughead really isn’t all that much of an outcast. He’s best friends with one of the most popular jocks in school and is dating the girl-next-door archetype.
The Ambiguity Of The Black Hood
When the Black Hood first appeared at the end of season 1, fans were left wondering who could possibly be this hooded man who had shot Fred Andrews.
Come season 2, and theories of who might be Black Hood abounded. Popular theories included Hal Cooper, Tall Boy, and Sherriff Keller. But the identity of the Black Hood was revealed for the mid-season finale when the unlikely character of the janitor, who was only introduced a few episodes prior to his reveal.
Unfortunately, based on the most recently released Riverdale episode, it looks like the Black Hood is still at large, after Midge is taken out by someone who claims to be the Black Hood.
Is this going to be another Pretty Little Liars situation where we are led towards endless red herrings until the true identity is revealed? It certainly seems that way so far.
"Bughead" and "Falice"
It all started off pretty innocently with Jughead and Betty's relationship. Then we were given a glimpse of a history between their parents, FP Jones and Alice Cooper.
Next thing we know, Alice is going over to FP’s trailer late at night, and FP is going to support Alice in the play that she is starring in – only to be dismayed when he sees that Alice and Hal Cooper have seemingly got back together.
But wait – what does that mean, if FP and Alice rekindle the love they had as young serpents? What does it mean for the iconic Bughead relationship?
There's something weird about parents dating while their children do as well.
What about the theory that Chic is FP’s son – meaning that Bughead share a sibling? It sounds like something out of Gossip Girl.
When Betty Joins The Serpents
Fans stared in disbelief as they watched the sweet and innocent – albeit dark – Betty do the serpent dance at the Whyte Wyrm.
Let’s just remember a couple of things here, to put things into perspective. Betty is a teenager, and she is doing a dance for all to see, including her mother and elderly men like Tall Boy and her boyfriend’s father, FP.
Why was this scene included in the show at all? Why did nobody stop it? Alice, for instance, who we saw quite clearly at the beginning of season 1 as being totally overprotective, appears to have changed her tune entirely to the point where she barely bats an eye when Betty does the serpent dance.
The Mackenzie Falls – Riverdale Similarities
Many Riverdale fans remember the fictional television show Mackenzie Falls, that originated from the Disney channel television series Sonny with a Chance (starring Demi Lovato).
This was a fake television show that was discussed constantly on Sonny with a Chance, and considered So Weird's main competition by the fictional cast members.
The fictional Mackenzie Falls was a ridiculous conglomeration of every cliché from every teen soap opera ever, and become such a running joke amongst fans of Sonny with a Chance that Disney producers eventually decide to create a real mini-series of Mackenzie Falls.
Mackenzie Falls was ridiculous, and it was supposed to be.
Some fans of Riverdale have noticed some similarities between the two television shows’ plotlines. We're starting to get concerned that Riverdale writers and producers have maybe been too heavily influenced by what was supposed to be a spoof show.
What about Nana Rose?
Remember when Cheryl burned down Thornhill at the end of season 1? Fans everywhere were rooting for her; pumped up about her gusto and excited that she was finally standing up to her mother.
In our haste to laud Cheryl as a hero for burning down the toxic Thornhill, everyone momentarily forgot about the creepy and frail Nana Rose, whom Cheryl seems to have some sort of strange love-hate relationship with.
At the end of season 1, some of us suspected that Cheryl had possibly ended Nana Rose unintentionally in the fire, yet Nana Rose appears to be alive and well for season 2. Where she was during the fire was never explained.
Whatever happened there, we’re pretty happy she’s still alive, as Nana Rose is an iconic character who adds a level of creepiness to the show that we love and need.
The Overwhelming Changes From The Comics To The Show
Don’t get us wrong – we love the very liberal interpretations of the Archie Comics characters for its dramatic television interpretation, Riverdale.
But we have to be honest: the characters are hardly an accurate representation of the actual Archie Comics characters!
What with Ms. Grundy being a total (creepy and predatory) babe, and Chic being a (likely) murderer, we’re hard pressed to find a character that accurately represents the original Archie Comic character.
Not that that’s bad. But it’s fun to imagine what the real life actors would look like if they were a more accurate representation of the original characters – especially Jughead’s far more realistic nose, and Fred’s totally dad-like hair.
Although Betty, Kevin, and Archie generally look quite a bit like their characters, we have to admit we like the television show look far more than the comic book look!
Immoral Archie
Remember the sweet innocent Archie we knew from season 1 of Riverdale, who only cared about his music and not disappointing his dad?
Sure, he was selfish in how he treated women, but he wasn’t a bad person – he even broke his hand to save Cheryl from the frozen depths of Sweetwater River!
Halfway through season 2, Archie suddenly turned on his own family in the interest of serving Hiram Lodge.
Archie’s intentions are not even clear at this point – we do not understand why he is so adamant about remaining loyal to Hiram, especially when he is given the choice to choose between Hiram and his own father, Fred.
Unless Archie has some sort of ulterior motive that have yet to be revealed, we are confused as to why he’s done such a dramatic 180 in terms of where his loyalty stands.
Archie Suddenly Being Into Betty
Speaking of Archie – remember how insistent he was that he had absolutely no interest in his gorgeous best friend, Betty Cooper? This was a recurring theme for the early episodes of the Riverdale.
It makes sense that Betty might still harbor some leftover feelings for Archie, given that she had a crush on him for years prior to the television show’s start date. But where in the heck did Archie’s interest for Betty stem from?
Obviously, it’s unquestionable that she’s gorgeous, fierce, and intelligent.
It’s frustrating to see how easy it was for Archie to change his mind on a whim.
He went from being completely uninterested in Betty to suddenly being jealous of her relationship with Jughead and kissing her during their hunt for the Black Hood.
What gives, Archie?
"Serpent" Jughead is more of a garden snake
Jughead has broken up with Betty on several occasions now, usually under the false pretext of protecting her from himself.
Truthfully, every time he does it, he breaks Betty’s heart and it really seems like he is doing it for nobody else other than himself.
In the scene where Jughead and Betty sneak into Jason’s room and they run into the very creepy Nana Rose, Jughead, startled, hides behind Betty as Nana Rose says some seriously weird stuff.
As much Jughead pretends to be this dark and brooding guy from the wrong side of the tracks, at the end of the day, as this meme proves, he’s just as sensitive as the rest of us! This is a tough Serpent Prince?
Everyone Kissing
The kiss between Veronica and Betty kicked Riverdale off with a very confusing bang, especially since nothing ever came of it.
It was all very well when Veronica kissed Archie. We knew they were end game. And then when Betty and Jughead kissed? Well, it was not as per the comics, but it was adorable nonetheless, and fans eventually came together to worship Bughead more than any other couple on Riverdale, except perhaps the iconic blossoming relationship of Toni and Cheryl.
When Archie and Betty kissed, our Riverdale world, as we knew it, fell apart. Then Veronica and Jughead kissed and we truly began to question the decisions and thought processes of the writers.
As with most teen dramas, the main characters often find themselves hooking up with pretty much all of the other characters on the show – but c’mon, we’re only on season 2! Couldn’t they have waited a little while longer?
Age Discrepancies
The text from this meme pretty much sums it up, but let’s hash it out:
Polly and Jason were in the same class, but Jason and Cheryl were twins. But Polly and Betty are not the same age; Polly is older than Betty – she is Betty’s older sister.
Nope, we did not miss anything. Those are the hard facts. But something is missing here.
How can it be? It doesn’t matter how you put it, this simply does not make sense. Why did the writers decide never to acknowledge this glaring plot hole?
Perhaps the only explanation is if Jason skipped a year or if Polly was held back a year.
But then why was Jason friends with all the students in Betty’s grade, and why wasn’t Polly?
How Everyone Is A Blossom But Then It’s Never Addressed Again
Remember near the end of season 1 when the Coopers come storming into Thornhill and it’s revealed that the Blossoms and the Coopers are related?
Remember at the house party at Archie’s place for Jughead’s birthday, when Veronica accused Cheryl of being way too close to Jason?
These interesting revelations are sadly never discussed much more, apart from a quick dismissal during a discussion between Cheryl and Toni.
The Blossom family connections seemed so prevalent throughout season 1, but along comes season 2 and we’re suddenly taken up in the Lodge gangster storyline and the Blossom-Cooper storyline is put on the back burner. What’s with that? We miss the days that Cheryl would constantly call Betty and Polly her cousin – it was hilarious!
The Hiram – Archie Relationship
Okay, so we get that Archie is young and easily manipulated. But what is going on with what has been dubbed the “Harchie” relationship?
It started off pretty innocently, with Archie stressing out about impressing his girlfriend’s dad.
Next thing you know, Archie is helping Hiram at his gangster group poker game and driving Veronica around in the car provided to him by Hiram, as some sort of chauffeur.
Why is Archie so obsessed with Hiram? What started off as a normal relationship has become somewhat of an obsession, and we are scratching our heads to try to understand why Archie has such a vested interest in Hiram – and why Hiram is so trusting of Archie!
Let’s not forget that Hiram is some sort of high-up gangster. Yet he’s trusting Archie with some of his most trusted secrets!
The Numerous Breaks We’ve Had To Endure Throughout Season 2
As fans, we understand that the actors of Riverdale need some time off to recuperate. Afterall, Riverdale was largely an unexpected success, and the actors on the show now have huge careers thanks to it.
They need to go home to see their families, to go on vacation, and to celebrate holidays. Also, this season there are twice as many episodes as the first season, which means a lot more work for the actors.
Seriously: three breaks in one season?
As it is, millennials are being deprived of their usual binge-watching abilities by the CW releasing just one episode per week, in a traditional sort of television network way. Then they have to go ahead and leave us with cliffhangers on three separate occasions, on top of the break between seasons!
Too Much Hiram
Hiram, again? At this point, we’re a bit unsure of the relevance of the amount of attention the show’s producers have given to Hiram.
We get it: he’s a mob boss and is taking over the town of Riverdale. He’s also the father of one of the show’s most iconic characters, Veronica.
Then why don’t they give us more scenes of Veronica, rather than her annoying father? Or, as this meme points out, why not give us more scenes of the blossoming relationship of Cheryl and Toni?
Unless Riverdale is going to give us a big reveal and show us that Hiram is involved in the whole Black Hood mess, then it’s becoming a bit tiresome how much attention is being given to him. So many other fascinating plotlines and character development opportunities are being passed up!