New Girl is one of the quirkiest sitcoms on television, and when it closed off its seventh and final season in 2018, we were more than devastated to say goodbye to its dynamic and unique cast of characters. From Nick's stellar one-liners to Jess's quirky sweetness to Schmidt's uncomfortably hilarious nature, this squad is one we'll never forget.
While each of these characters have incredibly different qualities, we thought we'd figure out which Hogwarts House this crew would fall into if they were in the next Harry Potter film. Grab the sorting hat and fasten your seat-belts, let's sort some characters.
Coach: Gryffindor
Coach isn't exactly the best character there is, but he always gets us with his surprising moments of sincerity and chivalry. Coach doesn't exactly fit like a glove into one of the houses, but we're voting for Gryffindor for his sense of adventure, loyalty, and courage.
Coach is usually willing to try new things and is ambitious in his life goals, and he'll always be there if you need him to be. He's definitely not one to shy away from adventure and helping out.
Aly Nelson: Slytherin
Aly is definitely an interesting character, and we love to laugh at her cringy comments and out-there personality. Aly is intelligent, there's no putting that past her, but she's also arguably the most cunning and resourceful character on the show.
She's willing to do anything to get what she wants (even if it's in an incredibly quirky manner). She's proud of herself, ambitious in her career, and is definitely determined as hell. What does that spell? S-l-y-t-h-e-r-i-n.
Reagan: Slytherin
Reagan also lands into this seemingly evil house, but honestly, it's for all of her incredible characteristics that make her one stellar and independent woman. Reagan definitely has some flaws, but they actually fit incredibly well into this house.
She's ambitious, intelligent, and incredibly capable of using whatever tools she's given. We love Reagan for all these reasons, but she also has that deeper insecurity regarding loyalty and comradery. Hmm, sounds a little slithery...
Robby: Ravenclaw
Robby is quite honestly the epitome of Ravenclaw. While we almost put him as a Hufflepuff, it was hard to ignore his raven-like qualities. Robby's entire sense of self relies on his knowledge and intelligence, and he's pretty well-rounded with anything and everything.
He's also creative, clever, and most definitely quirky! Robby's quirks and wisdom without a doubt put him as a Ravenclaw, and we love him for it.
Sam Sweeney: Gryffindor
You'll remember Sam as Jess's boyfriend that is incredibly handsome and just so happens to be a pediatrician. Sam is pretty emotionally-reserved, but this is masked by his adventure and easy-going nature.
Sam is cynical about relationships, but he isn't afraid to be brave and do what's best for everyone. When he senses Nick and Jess have feelings for each other, Sam tells them. This takes incredible bravery and selflessness, and if that doesn't make Sam a Gryffindor, we don't know what does.
Schmidt: Slytherin
If Schmidt isn't a Slytherin, then Harry Potter isn't a Gryffindor. Can you think of anyone more cunning, ambitious, proud, and intelligent? Nope, us either, and we don't think we have to make more of an argument than that to prove that Schmidt belongs in this house.
He also even has that hint of evil, you know?
Cece Parekh: Ravenclaw
Cece was also one that is a little difficult to place, but we're going to go with Ravenclaw. Hold on to your hats, we're going to make a pretty decent argument for this decision. Cece's intelligence is often hidden by her beauty, and most definitely by her occupation as a model, but don't we always see Cece kind of annoyed by this stereotype?
Cece is literally always the voice of reason whenever Jess and the boys go off on a crazy tangent, and her wisdom is pretty much the reason they're all still alive. Cece is a secret leader, and that's exactly why she fits into this house.
Winston Bishop: Hufflepuff
Winston is the soft-hearted, soft-spoken cat-dad that we all love to watch and laugh along with. Yeah, Winston can be pretty weird and quirky (and that's the nice way of putting it), but Winston is also the most playful and patient character we see on this show.
He's pretty generous, and he hates conflict and hurting people's feelings. He's dedicated and loyal, and that's enough to place him in this super sweet house.
Nick Miller: Gryffindor
Nick is another one of those characters that don't exactly fit into a Hogwarts house and, in fact, we're so in love with Nick's uniqueness that we almost made one up just for him. However, if we had to pick one, we're going to toss him into the Gryffindor house, despite that he'd likely protest it.
Why Gryffindor? Well, Nick is actually incredibly loyal, and contrary to what's on the forefront, Nick is actually really courageous when it comes to helping others and doing the right thing. Sure, he's pretty lazy and doesn't really care about himself, but we'd bet on him to take on any adventure if it meant saving a friend.
Jess Day: Hufflepuff
Like Schmidt is a Slytherin, Jess is a Hufflepuff. To literally quote her, "sometimes I think I was bred in a lab to help people". Yeah, we think so, too, and that's exactly why she's a Hufflepuff. Jess's loyalty and hard work is actually almost a fault she is so dedicated to these two things, but we love that she's the sweetest and most selfless person we've ever seen on our television screens.
Jess is also not afraid of adventure and always has the courage to stand up for what she believes in. Jess is practically the poster-child for Hufflepuff, and we're not accepting any arguments against it.