Well, there was no way news this big was going to be concealed forever, and people this is HUGE! This could bring the very existence of Hollywood into question. What is this news I speak of? It’s news that turns S1M0ne into an uncanny look at the future of cinema.
We all know that Hollywood has been slowly replacing actors with digital stuntman for years now. Earliest example I can recall is Wesley Snipes as Blade in Blade 2 during one of the opening fight scenes. After that, Legolas, Orlando Bloom, had several full CGI replacements during the trilogy Lord of the Rings. Jar Jar Binks, of Star Wars: Episode One infamy, would probably been an example of how NOT to do a full CGI replacement.
And CGI is not being used to just replace stuntmen, Hollywood has been slowly “enhancing” and touching up some of our favorite actors and actresses. Patrick Stewart recently got the “young-over” treatment on Xmen Origins: Wolverine. Sir Anthony Hopkins was given the same treatment to play young Hannibal Lecter in Red Dragon.
I’m usually OK with producers and SFX guys making some of the hottest women in Hollywood that much hotter. Cover up a mole here, conceal a zit there or even just removing the bags from under their eyes after they were out all night drinking and partying. But are those same guys starting to cross the line? The first time CGI enhancement really influenced how we viewed actresses, I feel, would be the breast enhancement given to Angelina Jolie for Tomb Raider. Apparently she just wasn’t “big” enough for the role, I disagree and think Ms. Jolie is perfect the way she is, but even so, at least it was 95% her and 5% CGI.
What I do have a problem with, however, is the blatant attempt to play a ruse on us. It would appear that Megan Fox in the upcoming Transformers 2 movie, has been completely replaced by CGI! That’s right, apparently the only way to have a woman as hot as Megan Fox in a movie is to just make her from scratch using CGI and animatronics – and thanks to the guys over at Film Drunk pointing us in the right direction, we now have a video to prove it.
As you can tell by now this whole article is very much tongue-in-cheek, but damn if it isn’t just plain funny. The people at Landline TV put this farce together and it is much appreciated. Let’s hope that Hollywood doesn’t ever truly go this route. Jar Jar is one thing but when they start messing with the women, Heaven help us all.
Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen opens June 24, 2009.
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