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15 Things That Make No Sense About Star-Lord

When watching any Marvel movie, the audience knows to suspend belief in order to have a good time. If we debated the logic or realism of these intergalactic societies and beings, the confusion would never end. So we go along with the stories of aliens and gods and talking trees, because that's what these comic adaptations are all about!

But if you think that will stop fans from picking apart every film down to the very last detail, you'd be absolutely wrong. From Easter-Eggs to plot-holes, even comic to film inconsistencies, Marvel fans just don't miss a beat.

When it comes to Star-Lord from Guardians of the Galaxy, it's no different. There are a lot of things about Star-Lord that simply don't add up. Star-Lord has always been a fan favorite, proving himself to be one of the most entertaining and hilarious to watch on screen. But after his disastrous turn in Infinity War, now seems like a good time to point out some of his inconsistencies.

Be it comic to film mishaps, or just general oversights, there is plenty that the MCU Star-Lord needs to answer for. Or better yet, that James Gunn and the writers need to answer for!

Here are 15 Things That Make No Sense About Star-Lord.

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Starlord No Sense Walkman
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15 His walkman/tapes are indestructible

Starlord No Sense Walkman

You're probably thinking – wasn't Star-Lord's walkman literally broken by Ego in Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2? Yes, and it was long overdue.

A big part of Star-Lord's charm is his love for 60s and 70s music. His music plays in majority of the scenes in the Guardians of the Galaxy films, and even becomes the focus of many scenes. The memorable opening scene of the first film where he dances his way through the temple to the orb, for instance, and when Star-Lord let's Gamora listen to his walkman during an almost romantic moment.

Without the music, Star-Lord just wouldn't be the same, but it doesn't change the fact that his walkman surviving this long makes no sense.

Through countless battles, many of which where Star-Lord literally gets thrown around and rolls on the ground, the walkman is still intact. Sure SONY made some decent walkmans, but battle ready walkmans are an entirely different story.

Not only that, but Star-Lord has managed to maintain his cassettes for all of these years – which also seem to be unbreakable. If anyone can remember the days of using tape players, you'll also remember the horrible sadness of unraveling and breaking tapes that happened all too often.

Though it may be unrealistic, we're also talking about a space outlaw comic hero, so we'll give the walkman a pass as long as we keep getting those killer musical fight scenes.

14 He lets his anger get the best of him in Infinity War

Most people who saw Infinity War are angry with one character – Star-Lord. Should we blame him for everything that happened? It's a lot of weight to put on one person, but honestly if we're going to blame anyone it probably should be him.

In one of the most important scenes of the film, we see Star-Lord along with some Avengers and his Guardian crew plot against Thanos in order to get the Infinity Gauntlet. Up until this point Thanos has been pretty hard to beat, but surprisingly the team pulls off the plan and they get Thanos under Mantis's control while they attempt to pull off the gauntlet.

They come incredibly close, until Star-Lord learns that Thanos took out Gamora in order to get the Soul Stone. Instead of waiting, say, 13 more seconds until the gauntlet was pulled from Thanos, Star-Lord let's his anger get the best of him and starts punching Thanos in the face. This action causes Mantis to lose the control over him she had, and Thanos regains his power and the Gauntlet.

Star-Lord has always been an emotional mess, but he is also usually able to pull it together when his friends need him. Now, in the most important battle of the universe, he throws caution to the wind and risks literally everyone's lives for a moment of revenge. As impulsive and careless as Star-Lord can be, he usually makes the right decision at the end – so why not this time?

13 He understands everyone

Starlord No Sense English Lang

Sure, this is just one of those things that makes the movies bearable, but to not even address why everyone speaks English in the Guardians of the Galaxy is a pretty big plot-hole.

Star-Lord was raised on Earth by and English speaking mother, so him speaking English makes sense. What doesn't make sense is the rest of the universe speaking English, and him understanding it. All of the Guardians would likely speak different languages since they are from such drastically different parts of the universe. Even Star Trek used the “universal translator” technology to explain it away.

James Gunn, however, did have something to say about it. Gunn responded to a fan's tweet, saying that they do in fact have translator implants which can be seen in Star-Lord's mugshot. This is obviously a blink and you'll miss it moment that Gunn had to point out before anyone understood it.

Even still, the translator doesn't quite make sense. How does everyone else understand each other? And if he is using a translator, why do everyone's lips still match up to the English language? Again, this is just one of those things that, if accurate, would make for an annoying viewing experience – but it's still worth pointing out.

One last question, if Star-Lord has an intergalactic translater, why can't he understand Groot?

12 His celestial powers

Starlord No Sense Celestial Powers

At the end of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, we're left wondering whether or not Star-Lord maintained any of the celestial powers he inherited from Ego. While he previously held an Infinity Stone to everyone's shock and surprise, Star-Lord still wasn't fully aware of his abilities until he met his father.

When Star-Lord meets Ego, it is under the guise that Ego wants to be the father he was never able to be. Ego takes Star-Lord, Gamora, and Drax to his planet, and that's where things start to unfold. Ego shows Star-Lord how to harness his powers – and they even play a father-son game of celestial energy ball catch. Of course things go south pretty quickly, and Star-Lord realizes that Ego is trying to destroy the world. The team then makes it their goal to stop Ego once and for all.

Ego tells Star-Lord that if he destroys him, he will destroy the “god” part of himself and be like everyone else. To which Star-Lord replies, “What's so wrong with that?” When Ego is destroyed, we see the celestial energy flicker and go away in Star-Lord's hands, suggesting that the “god” side of him is gone, but is it? Marvel is known for bringing back both people and powers that were lost, so we can't actually be sure if Star-Lord is “just like everyone else” or not.

11 He knows who Jackson Pollock is

Starlord No Sense Jackson

Ah yes, the Jackson Pollock joke that James Gunn never thought would make it into the film. Of the now infamous line, Gunn says, "the Jackson Pollock line was something I said on set and asked Chris to say. We only filmed it one time. People thought we were wasting time on set, because nothing that dirty would ever make it into the film." He was clearly wrong, and it's one of the more memorable lines of the first Guardians film.

The line in question is a moment where Star-Lord is referring to his spaceship and says, “Oh she has no idea. If we had a blacklight this place would look like a Jackson Pollock painting.” It's a hilarious and dirty reference to the painter Jackson Pollock, who was famous for paintings that were splattered with random colors.

As clever as the joke is, the actual reference doesn't quite add up.

When Star-Lord left Earth, he was only eight years old. While Jackson Pollock definitely existed at the time, it is hard to believe that Star-Lord could make that pop culture reference. As an eight year old who was seemingly obsessed with his walkman and music, he likely wouldn't have known who the painter is.

10 He's an emotionally unstable team leader

Starlord No Sense English

Without the proper comic book background of Star-Lord in the Guardians films, there's not much that gives us confidence in him as a leader or warrior. We know he was raised by the Ravagers and he claims to be a famous outlaw, but when it comes to sound judgment, Star-Lord isn't quite there. He proves time and again that he's a shaky team leader at best.

There are too many times where Star-Lord lets his emotions or his ego get the best of him in serious situations. When the Guardians do finally get together, it seems that Gamora has to do all of the reasoning while Star-Lord still gets credit for being the captain. If you consider the comic books and how much Star-Lord has accomplished, it seems like a stark contrast to the Star-Lord we're introduced to in the MCU.

That being said, somehow amidst his rash and emotionally charged decisions, Star-Lord almost always ends up on top at the end. In reality, a captain who is this all over the place would not lead a successful team. Thankfully the Guardians take up a lot of the slack, proving that they are all just as important assets. Without them Star-Lord would have failed many times.

9 He doesn't know who Ronan is

Starlord No Sense Ronan

In the first Guardians of the Galaxy film, Star-Lord not only dislikes the Kree, he doesn't seem to be familiar with their leader at all. When trying to trade the orb in the beginning of the film, he even asks who Ronan is. Now, we know that the MCU doesn't follow the comics religiously, but this was a pretty big change.

In the comics, Star-Lord not only knows who Ronan and the Kree are, he actually works alongside them for years. Star-Lord even helps the Kree rebuild their defenses and becomes Ronan's military adviser.

It's safe to say that comic book Star-Lord has a decent relationship with the Kree.

So why did the MCU decide to wipe out this entire storyline and use Ronan and the Kree as the seemingly unkown to Star-Lord villains of the film? It was likely used to keep the Infinity Stone narrative going, allowing Thanos to loom over the film as he has been over the MCU for some time now. The MCU has a way of ignoring back-stories, and Star-Lord's is one that we wish they stuck to more.

Without Star-Lord's intergalactic background, he just comes off as a egotistic outlaw who has no right to the claims he makes about himself. Comic book Star-Lord has every right to toot his own horn.

8 There's a tape deck in his ship

Yet another charming Star-Lord detail that doesn't quite make sense if you really think about it. Somehow, Star-Lord has managed to engineer an old-school tape deck into his space ship. This adds to the whole nostalgic earth thing he has going on, but how he even got the parts or know-how to build a tape deck is basically an after thought.

It's assumed that Star-Lord has not returned to earth ever since his capture as an eight year old. That being said, he would have needed to get seriously creative with making a tape deck that will actually play a tape from earth.

Even if he was able to find scraps around the universe and somehow put the tape deck together, how did he figure out how to make it work? We could say trial and error, or that Star-Lord had a lot of time on his hands and is so music obsessed he just made it work. Maybe there was just a built in tape deck from the last earth music loving person who owned the ship? Okay now we're stretching. It seems like when it comes to the earthly musical charms of Quill, it's best to suspend belief and enjoy the ride.

7 Is it power or luck?

Starlord No Sense Luck

We learn in Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 that Star-Lord has had celestial abilities since he was born. While his mother is a human of earth, his father is the celestial god Ego who makes up half of Star-Lord's DNA, therefore making Star-Lord half celestial being.

He doesn't know this until he is much older, so it leaves us to wonder if Star-Lord's “powers” up until this point can actually be attributed to the celestial half of him. Since this part of him was seemingly dormant until he met Ego who showed him how to harness it, it's difficult to say how much these powers helped.

They clearly helped him survive the Infinity Stone in Guardians of the Galaxy, so what else did his powers help him survive? This could explain why Star-Lord's plans often seem to work out of sheer dumb luck. More times than not, Star-Lord's original plans go wrong, but things end up working out for him anyway. Is this his celestial side taking over or is Star-Lord just that good at getting out by the skin of his teeth?

It could definitely be a combination of both, and it will be interesting to see how Star-Lord's “luck” changes now that his celestial side is supposedly gone.

6 Gamora's love for him

Starlord No Sense Gamora Love

Before we get too much hate for this, let's acknowledge that the love story between Gamora and Star-Lord is an adorable one. It's an opposites attract, will they or won't they, “unspoken love” that both try to resist. Both characters bring out something different in the other. Gamora is the voice of reason to Star-Lord, and Star-Lord helps Gamora to open up emotionally.

We doubt Gamora would actually be able to put up with Star-Lord long enough for this to work long-term.

Star-Lord is known for being promiscuous, he's incredibly irrational and emotionally unstable, and his ego gets the best of him often. It's also fair to point out that this relationship doesn't come from the comics, but was movie made to give us a love story.

While Gamora is the perfect balance that Star-Lord needs, he isn't exactly the best for her. Star-Lord has proven to be someone who will sacrifice himself for his friends, or as they call themselves family, and it makes more sense for him and Gamora to stay a team. If they were in a relationship long-term, it would likely be a lot of her keeping him in place and getting annoyed by his flirtatious ways.

As relationships go, it would likely just complicate things more for the Guardians.

5 His massive ego

Starlord No Sense Ego

It's actually pretty satirical that Star-Lord's celestial father goes by the name Ego and quite literally has the biggest ego of any villain we've seen in the MCU so far. His goal is to wipe out the entire universe so he can be everything and everywhere. He basically wants to make himself the only god and has even destroyed thousands of his own children in the process of trying to make it happen.

So it's really no huge surprise that Star-Lord has a relatively big ego of his own. As much as he ends up resenting his father, Star-Lord is more like him than he wants to admit. In fact, his ego often gets the Guardians into far more trouble than they asked for.

You would think that espeically after realizing his parentage and seeing how dangerous Ego was that Star-Lord would rethink his ways, but as we see in Infinity War, none of this has seemed to change him. He makes an incredibly selfish decision that puts the entire universe in jeopardy without a second thought. One of Star-Lord's continuous problems is that every time he seems to learn a lesson and grow as a person, he still always falls back into his arrogant ways.

4 The fake orb

Starlord No Sense Orb

Star-Lord is known for pulling plans seemingly out of nowhere at the last minute. There's no question that he can pull of a con on almost anyone, but this one left everyone wondering how in the world he did it.

When Star-Lord survives the Infinity Stone and destroys Ronan with the help of the Guardians, they are left with the stone inside the orb as they found it. Yondu and the Ravagers are waiting to take claim of the orb, and this is when Star-Lord manages to switch out the orb for a fake. The question remains, where did this fake orb come from?

We can't be sure if he's been carrying this orb around in anticipation of this moment. It's also unclear how exactly this replica orb was forged. The orb isn't exactly a common item as far as we can tell. So did Star-Lord at some unseen time go to an intergalactic blacksmith to get a copy? Did he make it himself? We may never know. Not to mention it wasn't an exact replica, and it's surprising Yondu didn't notice.

Star-Lord's tricks make for some of the best plot-twists in the movies, but this one just doesn't add up.

3 He's unpredictable

Starlord No Sense Unpredictable

It's almost impossible to tell who, what, and when Star-Lord is going to take something seriously. While his joking demeanor is a huge part of his charm, his unpredictable ways make him an incredibly unstable captain.

In Infinity War, when Gamora is telling him that he must end her if Thanos gets ahold of her, he tries to joke about it at first. It isn't until she tells him to swear on his mother that he gets serious about the situation. In fact, he only seems to be snapped back into reality when a family member or friend is involved.

There is no rhyme or reason to how Star-Lord will treat a situation.

In Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2when they are being chased by the Soveriegn fleet, Star-Lord is more worried about getting into a flying match with Rocket than he is about saving their lives. His unpredictable carelessness is a huge reason why Gamora needs to be the sound voice of reason throughout most of their battles.

Of course, we have to mention Infinity War as well. In almost every other instance, Star-Lord has proven he knows how to take one for the team, and the one time the team needed him the most he wasn't able to sacrifice himself and his feelings for the greater good. While it makes for good entertainment, Star-Lord's erratic behavior can be infuriating.

2 His upbringing

Starlord No Sense Upbringing

In the MCU, Star-Lord is painted as a kid with a rough upbringing who did the best he could after losing his mother, getting abducted, and being brought up by thieves. He isn't a particularly skilled leader or level-headed guy, but he has heart and he's a hilariously upbeat earthling who is fun to watch interact with the rest of the universe.

It's actually incredibly surprising that Star-Lord would be the fun, careless guy that we're introduced to in the first film. Even if you ignore the comic book source material which puts Star-Lord through an incredible amount of trials and conquests, his upbringing would be enough to break anyone. Instead of having a similar attitude to the rest of the Ravagers, he seems to be unphased by his past life.

One explanation could be that he's laughing through the pain. After going through such trauma as a kid, maybe his only way to cope is to listen to his music and remember better times. But when past issues are brought up – his mother for instance – Star-Lord still gets incredibly emotional. His past clearly still effects him in some way. In all honesty, the fact that he's not a villain is a miracle.

1 His engineering skills

Starlord No Sense Engineer

Star-Lord managers to do a lot of things that aren't particularly in his skill set – or maybe they are. He has always been known for being a master strategist and con-man who can steal, swap, and get away with almost anything. He's also incredibly skilled in combat and with all forms of weapons. So should we also add expert engineer to his list of abilities? Maybe even master collector and repurposer of 80s nostalgia as well.

We discussed his mysterious tape deck on ship, but that's not the only thing Star-Lord has apparently been able to build. He manages to turn an old Mattel football game from the 80s into a tracking device that works in space. That is no small feat. It's one thing being skilled with various alien fire arms, it's another thing rewiring a simple Earth game to pick up intergalactic signals.

When it comes down to it, Star-Lord's abilities are kind of all over the place.

He's always surprising us with some newly thought up idea that seems too ridiculous to work but ends up working just the same. It may be what makes him such a good outlaw – nobody really knows his full potential.

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Can you think of anything else that makes no sense about Star-Lord? Let us know in the comments!

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