Mad Men offers us a glimpse into an exciting, yet tragic, world of the 1960s. During that time period, the world started changing at breakneck speed: for the first time ever, American women could choose between marrying and settling down in the suburbs or pursue their own interests and work on their careers. For this reason, many believe that Peggy Olson is the true protagonist of Mad Men: she was a true pioneer when it comes to women's emancipation.
Peggy's polar opposite is Betty Hofstadt (previously Betty Draper), a woman who chose the conventional life of a housewife and essentially sleepwalked through life. Mad Men characters were all tragic in one way or another, but no one is as tragic as Betty.
She Only Cared About Appearances
Betty had no personality of her own; to her, keeping up appearances equaled living your best life. She got a lot of validation for being so pretty and was compared to beauties, such as Grace Kelly. She was quite the fashion icon, but she almost never got a chance to shine. Even when she found out she is dying, she made a point to look her best in the coffin by leaving behind instructions for Sally.
When she was married to Henry, Betty gained a lot of weight. She even dyed her hair black after a stranger called her a "bottle blond".
She Held On To Her Mother's Outdated Values
Betty would have saved herself a lot of struggles if she found her own voice in life rather than have her mother dictate her lifestyle from beyond the grave. No wonder Betty was so obsessed with looking beautiful: that's the only thing she learned from her mother. She proudly told her therapist that her mother was very beautiful.
It's clear that Betty never truly processed her mother's death, otherwise, she would have started questioning her values at some point in her life. The fact that she was so beautiful kind of worked against her. If she wasn't that gorgeous, she wouldn't hold on to her mother's notions.
Her Only Friend Was A Little Boy
Betty's friendship with Glen Bishop was one of the weirdest story arcs on Mad Men. Since Glen's mother was divorced, Betty sometimes stepped in to babysit. In "New Amsterdam", he asked her for a lock of her hair and she gave it to him. Glen's mom proceeded to forbid him to talk to Betty again.
One of the saddest scenes happened in "The Wheel", one of the best episodes of Mad Men: "I can't talk to anyone ... I'm so sad," said Betty to Glen. How tragic: the only person who'd listen to her was a boy who had a crush on her.
She Was Psychologically Struggling
Betty started seeing a therapist in season 1 after she reported that her hands tend to start shaking uncontrollably and that they feel numb. It turned out that the symptom was psychosomatic, which indicates that Betty was in a lot of distress. During her sessions, it turned out that she thinks and acts like a little girl rather than an adult woman.
Betty never resolved her inner struggles. It's as if she was constantly in a survival mode, living one day at a time. She had no direction in life and no will to change anything about it.
Sally And Betty Didn't Get Along
Betty wanted Sally to be an agreeable and beautiful girl, but much to her dismay, Sally never cared about being pretty. Betty has done some shameless things as a parent: she often punished Sally and yelled at her, hoping that she will bend to her will eventually.
Even though they weren't very loving towards one another, their arc ended on a positive note. Betty recognized Sally's rebellious nature as a virtue rather than something to worry about: "Sally, I always worried about you because you marched to the beat of your own drum. But I now I know that’s a good thing."
Don Was Not A Good Husband To Her
Don was a horrible husband to Betty. First of all, he kept a huge secret about his true identity from her and she also didn't let her have a life of her own. He sabotaged her modeling career and he wouldn't even let her wear her cute yellow bikini. Even though Don's marketing pitches would still be as compelling today as they were back then, he could never get away with being such a strict husband.
Betty trusted Don, but she shouldn't have. He even had her therapist spy on her for him, which is a huge violation of her privacy. Betty wasn't a great wife either, but at least she always stood by his side.
She Hated Being A Housewife
Betty hated being a housewife. She was bored, lonely, and frustrated. Even her children didn't bring her much joy. Instead, she felt as if she was constantly waging a war with them: "I am here with them all day, alone and outnumbered", she complained to Don regarding their children.
Because she didn't enjoy her chores as a housewife, she also didn't have any real friends. When she met the divorced neighbor, she said she pitied her, but she was actually jealous of her.
She Didn't Keep Up With The Changing Times
When Mad Men first began, a woman's place was at home, but as the show continued, more and more women were seen bucking this tired old idea. While Peggy was the odd one out in the beginning, it was Betty who seemed like she belongs to another time by the time the show wrapped up.
That's what's even more tragic than Betty's housewife status: even though she hated it, she didn't want to change either. Well, she did go to college to pursue a degree in psychology, but it was already too late by then.
She Never Had A Chance To Get To Know Herself
Betty went from being a daughter straight to being a wife, which wasn't that uncommon in the sixties. After all, Trudy also married Pete while still maintaining a very close relationship with her parents.
After marrying Don, she assumed the socially prescribed role of a housewife. When she finally divorced him and had a chance to (re)discover herself, she instead rushed into her second marriage. Betty was like a bird in a cage that never got a chance to spread her wings and fly.
She Died Of Lung Cancer
The single most tragic thing about Betty is that she died of lung cancer when she was less than fifty years old. It didn't come as much of a surprise, considering she was a chain smoker, but so was Don, Roger, and most other characters on the show. What's especially sad is that she died because of cigarettes, a product that Don helped sell by working with Lucky Strike.
Betty wasn't really that upset upon hearing she doesn't have much time left. She didn't want to do chemo: "I've learned to believe people when they say it's over," she said. Considering she never really enjoyed her life, it doesn't come as a surprise that she was ready to die.