Every great story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth. Danielle Drouin and Matt Thomas’s romance on Love is Blind, and after it, is no exception. Danielle fell hard for both Matt and Rory Newbrough, and was torn between the men, but ultimately decided to become engaged to Rory. This led to Matt being broken-hearted, but his heart break wouldn’t last, because soon Danielle and him would start dating.
The Matt and Danielle romance seems like a roller coaster. It had so many ups, downs, twists, and surprising moments. The former couple dated for two months before ending things. Danielle claims that Matt wanting an open relationship was the main reason for its ending, but Matt cites them being too similar as the eventual downfall.
Luckily, Screen Rant got the opportunity to speak to Danielle and Matt to conduct two separate interviews, and got each of their side of the story. Matt told us about him and Danielle bonding over yoga, his decision not to propose marriage, and an update on his current dating life.
How did you find out about Love Is Blind? Were you recruited or recommended? Walk me through that process.
They reached out to me on Twitter. It was probably about two to two and a half months before filming. And when they reached out, I immediately declined. I get some solicitations like that, not super regularly, but I just said no thanks. And then the casting agent just kept coming back and kept giving more information.
What really told me was that they positioned this as the anti-dating app, anti-Bachelor show. Instead of one guy and a bunch of girls, or one girl and a bunch of guys, there were equal numbers. And instead of a bunch of snap judgments based off just physical appearance and a short bio, it was the opposite. You don't get to see the person at all, and you get to go really deep before physical appearance plays any sort of part in the connection.
That really intrigued me, and I was asking more questions. Eventually, it came out that it was a very high budget show from Kinetic Content and Netflix. Obviously, I knew what Netflix was, but I looked up Kinetic Content - and just their professionalism and the other successful shows they'd done, I thought, 'This is a legitimate opportunity.' So, I started going through casting and did a bunch of personality tests and interviews with producers and matchmakers and psychiatrists; all kinds of stuff. And then eventually got word that I got a spot on the show.
While going through the audition process, what did you want from the experience of Love Is Blind?
I was so intrigued by the social experiment. I thought it was so cool that we were going to be able to be the first group of people to try to find love this way. So, I was absolutely open to finding my person. I'll admit I didn't think it was all that likely. I thought it was going to be very difficult in just 10 days to fall in love with someone through a wall and propose to them, but that's part of the challenge that drew me in. I thought, 'Okay, we're all gonna go through this together.' Worst case scenario, I walk out and have this weird reality TV social experiment experience. But best case scenario, I'm walking out with my person.
Can you take me through your first day on Love Is Blind? What was is like being on the show?
Sure. The day before filming, we all met up and kind of did an orientation of sorts. They talked us through how the show was gonna work. We turned in our phones and our laptops, and that was really for the purpose of shutting [everything else] out completely. The only thing we were focused on for the next 10 days was dating.
The first person that I met was Rory Newbrough. We sat next to each other on the first day of orientation and we talked through most of meetings and in our downtime. We became immediate friends. We're both very similar people, into popular psychology, we turned our passions into our career, and he was just really talk to and connect with.
Everyone else was really easy to make friends with too. I ended up rooming with Westley Baer. Kenny (Barnes) and I were really fast friends also. And after the first night, we woke up the next day, got mic’d up and taught how mics work and everything because it was most of our first time being mic’d up. And then we were told that we were going to walk through a door and meet with Nick Lachey and the experiment was going to start. I remember thinking, 'What the heck is my life?' What a strange thing to hear.
So, we line up and we go in one at a time, and we kind of mingle and pretend to meet each other again. Then we sit down, and Nick and Vanessa (Lachey) come in and give us the rundown. Within a few minutes, we're lining up to go into the pot for our first round of speed-dating. So, 15 dates in seven minutes each, and we got to talk to every single staff member on the show.
Which women did you connect with from the beginning?
It was immediate with the person I ended up connecting with. My first question in the round of speed dating was, given a plane ticket to anywhere and one bag, where do you go and what do you pack? I remember, I think my very first date - if not, it was definitely the first date that I remember - was with Danielle. She complimented the question and said immediately that she would go to Costa Rica. And I had just gotten back less than a year prior from living in Costa Rica. So, we had this immediate point of connection and common ground. We knew a lot of the same places and we could talk about the culture and specific, idiomatic phrases from Costa Rica.
And it was clear to me that her passion for travel and yoga and events was like mine. And so she was number 1 since day one. And as we started progressing through all the rounds, I started telling the other women that, 'Hey, I'm a one-track mind here. I like Danielle, I'm not really looking for friendship from anyone else. You're all amazing people, but I just have this really strong connection with Danielle.'
And so, what I ended up doing was - Lauren (Speed) had a really strong connection with Cameron (Hamilton), as everyone saw. And so, Lauren was actually my number two all the way through. So, we ended up dating all the way until proposal day. And we would just talk and be friends; she would talk about Cameron and I would talk about Danielle, and we would just talk about our lives. That's the person that I talked the second-most to. But, yeah, it was Danielle from the beginning.
Can you go into more detail about the relationship you developed with Danielle while in the pods?
Yeah. Like I said, we've got a lot of common ground. We both come from pretty big families; we both have four siblings. She's from the Boston area, and I'm from Philadelphia, so it's a similar kind of culture. And as we kept dating, it kept getting stranger and stranger how much we had in common and how easily we connected. I remember, there was one day when I walked into the pod and the whole thing had been transformed into a yoga studio. The lights were dimmed, there were candles, there was a yoga mat rolled out with the block and strap.
And that was one of her gifts to me when we were going through this experience. It was extremely stressful going through this together so fast and so intensely. So, Danielle would lead yoga [sessions]. The first one was really powerful; I was going through a lot, and she really helped.
And I remember another date, we were talking about where in Atlanta we lived, and we uncovered that we had been living across the street from each other and had never met.
And we were right by Piedmont Park in Atlanta, kind of the equivalent of Central Park in New York. Everyone goes there to run and walk their dogs and play pickup sports. I would go to the park almost every day, and so would she, and we would walk the same way. The fact that we lived across the street from each other for about two years and never ran into each other until the show, when we're 4 feet away from each other but on the other side of the wall, was mind-blowing. We both kind of had this moment of like, "Is this fate?" Did we go through this crazy experience for whatever reasons we did, but end up exactly where we needed to be exactly when to meet our person?
Can you tell me a little bit more about your friendship with Rory and both of you pursuing Danielle?
Yeah, that was another really beautiful part of the show. Rory and I, basically from the beginning, I found out that Rory had Danielle as his number one. Before I went on the show, I made a few promises to myself and to my inner circle. I wasn't gonna drink. I knew that people drinking would lead to things that people regretted, and I didn't want to do that.
The other thing I was going to do was, I wasn't going to talk about my dates with the guys; I wasn't going to talk about who I was connecting with. I knew that would be a big part of the show that I would be kind of missing out on, but I also knew that with a bunch of guys dating the same pool of girls, there would be some drama that came from that. And I wanted to avoid that.
So, I wasn't talking about any of my dates, and Rory was talking about his dates with Danielle. So, I kind of saw this coming, where, 'Okay, Danielle is my number 1 and Danielle's Rory's number 1.' This is going to come to a head, and there's going to be some sort moment here, and I wanted to get ahead of it. So one day after filming, I went to Rory's room that night, and knocked on his door and he opened it. He looked kind of confused, and I was like, 'Hey man, I need to talk.' I told him, 'Hey, we both like Danielle. I know this might come as a surprise to you, but she's been my number one since day one, and I think we just need to talk about that.' He said okay.
Rory's a competitive gamer turned game designer, so he has a competitive mindset like I do. I'm a competitive boxer, and I've won the world championship for a hybrid sport called Chessboxing. And I had just won the 2018 world championship, so I think we were both kind of pegged as competitive people. I think maybe the organizers of the experiment thought that we would probably fight over Danielle, and so I brought this up to Rory.
I was like, 'Listen, man. I don't think we should be on team Rory or Team Matt. I think we should be on Team Danielle. I think we should show her as much of ourselves as we can and paint a vision of the future. Not make it about the other guy, but make it about the connection between us and Danielle. And whatever decision that she chooses, I think we should support, and hopefully we can all three be friends because we're friends right now. And I don't know about you, but I don't want to be with someone that doesn't want to be with me. So if Danielle picks you, great! You're a great guy; you're kind, you're generous, you're successful. You're gonna take good care of each other. And if the inverse is true, I hope you can say the same and be friends.' And he saw eye to eye, and we shook on it and hugged it out.
The next day is when they did the reveal of who was dating who, so we were very prepared when we were pulled into an interview to talk about this. We basically said a version of what we agreed to the night before, which was that we support whatever Danielle decides, and this isn't going to come between our friendship. And we stayed true to that all the way through to the end.
Can you talk me through your decision not to propose?
I did propose; I just didn't propose marriage. On Proposal Day, I walked in and said, 'Danielle, I'm not going to offer you a ring today. I don't have any willingness to continue on with this experiment. But what I do propose is that we walk out of here together right now. And we buy a one way ticket to somewhere in the world and we start our lap around the globe.' I had developed real feelings; I had told her that I loved her through a wall, and I believe that. But when it came to feeling strongly enough to propose to her, to say forever, I wasn't ready to do that without experiencing her with not just my ears, but I wanted to see her and smell her and taste her and touch her. I wanted to be sure, with all of who I am, that when I said forever I meant it.
I told her that, and I think it resonated with a part of her. And I think a part of her did want to leave that day and walk out together. But there was another part of her, and I guess it was a stronger part of her, that told her that she wanted to continue on. She wanted to be with Rory, and she knew that Rory was going to propose. He had told her the night before, so she made her decision. And I said, 'Listen, when I see you on the other side, I meant what I said. I want to be your friend, and I'm really happy for you.'
I walked out of the pod after that, and I had my exit interview with Nick Lachey. And the last thing that he asked me before I left set was, 'Matt, there's going to be critics that say that it's impossible to fall in love through a wall. And it's impossible to fall in love in this short time. And it's impossible to have the kind of feeling that you have, where you're happy that the person that you love chose your friend over you. What would you say to those critics?'
In my career, in my line of work, we lead first time fighters - people that have never put on boxing gloves before - through a 60 day program to train them and fundraise for cause they believe in. We start every program with a quote by Roosevelt, called the man in the arena quote. And so when he asked, 'What would you say to those critics?' The quote starts out, 'It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.'
I said, 'Everyone in this experiment dared greatly to be here. And there's gonna be plenty of critics and naysayers and trolls that say that this wasn't real. They're wrong, and it's not the critic who counts.'
And about five minutes later, I was in an uber on my way home, and Danielle was engaged to Rory.
Can you walk me through the post-Love Is Blind relationship with Danielle?
Sure. The day after Proposal Day was Reveal Day. That's when everyone got to meet each other for the first time. As soon as Danielle and Rory met each other, they were cut from the show. The producers made the call that they couldn't follow every story. More people got engaged than they expected, so they cut two couples: Lexie and Westley and Danielle and Rory, which you obviously know.
That night, I forget who exactly was the organizer, but someone found everyone on social media. Someone messaged everyone saying, "Hey, let's meet in person and talk about the show," because none of the guys had met any of the girls yet that didn't get engaged. So, we ended up meeting at a bar in Atlanta and I showed up kind of on the front end, and I arrived before Rory and Danielle. I'll never forget them walking in together. I saw her for the first time, my legs got weak and I got super nervous; my heart started beating faster. She was holding hands with Rory, and on her other hand she was wearing an [engagement] ring; she was wearing a diamond.
I remember thinking, 'This is it. It's time for me not just to talk the talk, but I need to walk the walk here. I need to be their friend.' So, I walk up and I hold my hand out. And I say, 'Hey, I'm your friend, Matt.' Danielle knocks my hand away and gives me a big hug. I'm like, 'Okay, alright, this is how it's going to be. Great.' I go up and I hug Rory, and I end up talking to him and some of the other cast members for most of the night. Danielle and I don't really interact, we just kind of catch each other looking across the bar at each other.
The whole night, she and Rory were really touchy-feely and kissing, and it was obvious that they were together and happy and taking this seriously. So, in my mind I was like, 'Okay, this is over. I need to move on.' I want to leave, and Danielle stopped me before I left. She said, 'Hey, we we need to talk.' I said, 'Okay, what do we need to talk about?' She said, 'We can't do here, but I'm about to go on a trip and when I get back, I'd like to meet up with you.' I said okay. So, I went home, I went to sleep and woke up the next day.
About three months before the show, I had met a girl at a chess tournament. I was training for chessboxing, and I was at the World Open in Philadelphia, and I met another chess player. Her and I connected; it wasn't overly romantic or anything, we didn't even kiss, but it was just a strong connection. I stayed in touch with her, and she knew I was going on the show. So, the next day after the bar, I called her. She lives in Serbia, so there's a time difference and the physical distance, so we couldn't really be anything even if we wanted to.
So, I just told her everything that happened on the show. I fell in love with this girl, she picked another guy and they're together. And the way that she responded was awesome. She said, 'Okay, so you're telling me you're not engaged?' I said, 'No, I'm not engaged.' She said, 'Okay, let's do a trip together.' 'What, are you serious?' She said, 'Yeah. Let's go to Paris.' I said okay, and she pulled out her laptop right then and there; we booked flights to Paris, and we booked an Airbnb, and it was about two months out. So, I was taking steps to moving on.
Danielle gets back a few days later. I learned when she got back that she went to Miami with Rory to see if things would work. And when we met up when she got back, she wasn't wearing her ring, and she told me that she made the wrong decision, and that she wanted to see if this would work and if we could give this a shot.
Immediately, I tell her, 'Of course, I'm curious. You know, we met in this crazy way, and I felt a real connection. But I have to tell you that after seeing you at the bar and after being denied and not being picked on the show, I made steps to move on. I'm going on a trip with another girl in two months. I need you to know that before we start anything.'
She said, 'I understand. I still want to give this a shot. If you need to talk to her, do whatever you need to do, but just let me know.' And said okay. So, I went back to the Serbian girl that I was going to Paris with, and I called her and told her what had happened. And she asked me, 'Hey, if you don't pursue this, are you going to come to Paris with regret? Are you always going to wonder what if?' I said, 'Yeah, I think there's a part of me that would.' She said, 'I don't want that. So do whatever you need to do, explore whatever you need to explore, and I hope you still come to Paris.' I said okay.
So, I went back to Danielle and said, 'Let's give this a shot.' And we had a beautiful two months together. We met a lot of each other's friends and family. We hiked a lot, we did a lot of yoga, we had fun experiences. She's plant-based, and she's an amazing cook; she taught me to cook a lot of things. It was really easy. We ended up doing two trips together. I took her up to Philadelphia to meet my dad and his family for Thanksgiving. And then afterwards, we spent some time in New York City with my sister. And those trips were awesome, and I had a lot of fun with Danielle.
But they also told me kind of what I was suspecting as we went through this dating experience, which was that Danielle and I are so similar and have so much common ground and so many shared interests - almost like we're the same person. And I think that both of us realized through this experience that maybe in a life partner, it isn't best to have someone that's exactly like you. It might be best to have someone that balances you out, that's an equal opposite. Someone that's from the other side of whatever spectrum you're on, that can help give a different perspective and help you grow and challenge you in ways that you can't challenge yourself.
So, we talked about that the week before the Paris trip was supposed to happened, and we agreed on how to proceed with the intention of being friends. And that's what happened. I went to Paris, she ended up going to a Christmas party with her now boyfriend who she's moving in with, I think it's actually this week. They've looked into wedding rings, and it seems like it's a great fit for her because he's that kind of equal opposite. He's another developer in the video game industry and introverted. He's a better balance for her.
So, anyway, we had this beautiful chapter together and I think we've learned a lot, and a great friendship came out of it. Before this whole quarantine madness, we were doing yoga at least once a week - but sometimes multiple times a week together. Especially since the show came out, we have been talking a lot. And I'm still close friends with both Rory and Danielle; they're both really good people. I'm glad that the way we navigated the situation didn't lead to fighting and falling out and drama. I'm glad it led to friends that I think will be in my life for the rest of my life because of this crazy, shared experience and how well we connect.
Are you close with any other members of the cast besides them?
Yeah, I am. I mentioned Brawl For A Cause, my non-profit charity boxing event, and a lot of the cast members have ended up getting involved in that non-profit. Last year, Mark Cuevas and Taylor Lupton fought, and Kelly Chase and LC (Chamblin) were on our committee and volunteering for the organization. And this year, Damian Powers, Kenny Barnes and Jon Smith are all fighting. And we'll have even more cast members present at the event as members of the committee. I think we're basically using it as a cast reunion.
So, yeah, we're really close. I had a call with Westley last night, my old roommate from the show. I talk to Kenny pretty much every day, and he's training really hard to fight for his cause. Damian has an incredible story; he's fighting for his little brother, who has cystic fibrosis. He's fighting for someone really close to his heart, and he's a beast. He's such a big, strong guy with a big heart.
So, still really closely with multiple cast members, and I think we all did a good job of kind of staying in touch and supporting each other. And I hope that continues.
How do you feel about your story not being shown on Love Is Blind?
It's kind of two parts with me. One part is relief; the relief part of me knows that I would have had no control over how it was cut and how we were presented. I know some people aren't happy with how they were cut and how they were presented. So, it's a possibility and that didn't happen, so that's good.
Also, I think it would have been kind of painful to see our story unfold, me fall in love through a wall, and Danielle pick someone else. I think, personally, a little bit of pain was saved just with our story not being featured.
But then the other part of me thinks that people may have benefited from seeing how Rory and I navigated this situation. It doesn't have to be fighting over another human being, who you can't possibly win or own or anything like that, which I feel like a lot of these dramatic reality TV love triangles turn into. It would have been nice to show a different outcome, a different type of arrangement and interactions - one that I think is much more positive and constructive.
And, of course, I see classmates blowing up. I think Lauren's 2 million followers, people are getting on the Ellen Show and all that stuff. I think there's a part of me that would have been interested in having those kinds of life experiences, but I also never went on the show for that. My main intention was being open to love, and I think I was. I think that intention was fulfilled as well.
But another intention was to learn how reality TV style storytelling works, and to see how a production works on a big screen. With Brawl For A Cause, we take these everyday people through a hero's journey where they go from having never put on gloves before to fighting for the first time. There's inherent drama and transformation that happens, and I think it's a perfect fit for reality TV style content. And so, I think a part of me wanted to go on the show to learn how that stuff works and network with producers and see if Brawl For A Cause resonated with anyone in the case. Since we had multiple people fight last year and multiple people from the show are fighting this year, I think that intention was fulfilled as well.
So, it's not about me and my ego and my following. Brawl For A Cause is more important to me, and it seems like the organization is still benefiting in a really big way from the show. I'm a little bummed that our story wasn't featured, but it's not the end of the world. And there are good things that come from that too.
What do you think you learned from the experience? Is there anything from the experiment that you would carry into your next relationship?
I've had a crazy experience over the last couple days where I reconnected with a girl from my past, who saw me on the show and reached out as a result. It's crazy; her name is Danielle. And every day, we've been talking for at least two hours and as much as over four hours, like we're in the pods. We decided not to FaceTime and instead just do audio. We talk lying in bed, and it'll just be voice, kind of like the pod days. Even like the show, where we were encouraged to talk about sex or finances or things that could be a little scary for new connections to dig into, we've been giving ourselves permission to do it. And it's been really incredible.
I don't know if that really makes sense to include; it's not anything yet. I haven't seen her face in 10 years. But the impact of the show, even though I'm a relatively small part on the show, has been profound in my personal life. I was a good communicator and good at connecting with people before the show, but after the show it's a whole different level. Having the experience of being able to go so deep so fast with people, and the repetition and the practice of being vulnerable and open and sharing who I am and what I see my future looking like, and how someone else can fit into that, and how we can co-create a future together - all of that really changed my life and how I connect with people for the last year and a half.
I go deep immediately, whether it's a romantic relationship or whether it's a friendship or a business partnership. I think it's the most important thing that people can do, and I think this Netflix reality TV show is bringing a lot of these ideas and these conversations to the front of people's minds. And I think that's a really awesome shift. And it's something I'm proud that I was a part of, however small a part I had in it.
Is there anything you want to tell the readers about your experience?
I mean, I think that there's different kinds of readers. There's the critics who kind of doubt this, and I've already kind of given my answer to that with the Man in the Arena quote.
I think there's people that really love this and resonate with it and want more of it in their life, and what I would say to those people is you don't need a bunch of cameras and a fancy pod and to be on Netflix to have this kind of connection with someone. You can take these kind of questions and this kind of mindset and bring it to your own life and your own connections, and build your own relationships based off of what really matters. It's not always about who looks good at a club on a drunken night out. It's more about who you can trust, and who you can have direct and honest communication with, and who you can work together with to build a life.
And I hope that this show and maybe this interview will help people not just see that but apply that to their lives. I think the world and its relationships could be better as a result.