Tony Stark’s Biggest Spider-Man Lesson Came From Iron Man 3

The biggest lesson that Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) taught Spider-Man (Tom Holland) came from his own experience in Iron Man 3. Ever since Peter Parker was introduced in Captain America: Civil War, the genius, billionaire Avenger had become his unofficial mentor. Albeit reluctant at first, Tony eventually embraced the responsibility and treated the young hero as his protege in more ways than one.

Over time, Spider-Man and Iron Man's relationship developed into a father-son dynamic. In the five films that Spider-Man has appeared in the MCU, four of them also featured Iron Man. While Spider-Man: Far From Home didn't have a physical appearance from Tony, his presence loomed as the 2019 flick saw Peter mourn the death of his mentor following Avengers: Endgame. Tackling the pair's bond over several movies throughout the last few years allowed Marvel Studios to properly flesh out their link from a professional connection, since both are superheroes, to a much more personal one.

Admittedly, not everyone is a fan of this creative decision, with some people arguing that Spider-Man shouldn't idolize Iron Man and instead have his own identity. This criticism, objectively, has merit, especially when one looks at how much of Peter's solo adventures in the MCU have been shaped by his association with Tony. That being said, there are also major pros to their relationship, including the lessons Spider-Man learned from it. While Tony may not be the ideal mentor, he imparted some great knowledge to his contemporary, including arguably the most important one in Spider-Man: Homecoming. After Peter's attempt to catch Vulture (Michael Keaton) caused the Staten Ferry incident, Tony took back the upgraded suit he gifted the young hero, explaining that "if you're nothing without the suit, then you shouldn't have it." Subsequently, Iron Man made a comment about how much he sounds like his father, but this particular lesson wasn't from Howard Stark (John Slattery), it's from his own experience in Iron Man 3.

Tony Stark looking at his arm in Iron Man 3

After his near-death experience in The Avengers, Tony was haunted by the thought of another alien invasion. Of course, at that time, he was still unaware that Thanos (Josh Brolin) was looming in the shadows, waiting for the right time to make his move and collect all the Infinity Stones. But, the unnamed threat drove him paranoid in Iron Man 3, motivating him to create an army of suits that would hopefully make him better prepared for what's to come. So, when he was stripped of the protection of his own armor after crashing in Tennessee, he had to find a way to get moving and hijack The Mandarin's (Ben Kingsley) lair without it. Interestingly, it's Harley Keener (Ty Simpkins) who reminded him that he was a mechanic. At a time when he was about to have another panic attack after realizing that the Iron Man suit won't be ready for him to use once he infiltrated the terrorist's hideout, his young friend provided emotional support and gave him the idea to improvise.

In the end, Tony wanted Peter to learn that, ultimately, it's the man who wears the suit that defines the hero — something that he realized himself in Iron Man 3. At this point, Peter felt overeager to prove himself right that he went out of his way to hunt down Vulture on his own. Iron Man wasn't faultless here, however; he could've simply sat down with his new mentee and explained to him that he's doing something about it rather than keep his plans to himself. In any case, both heroes learned a lesson during the events of Homecoming which only made their relationship stronger moving forward.

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