Dog movies have been around since the dawn of time and will continue to get made long after the sun has completely burned out. Finding consistent success on medium or small budgets, family films centered around cute, strange, or fantastical canines have become a staple of the straight-to-video film world.
As with any major genre that finds large success on the home video market, this led to as many ideas as studios could fit onto a whiteboard getting produced. Harkening back to classics like Air Bud and The Shaggy Dog, the dog genre has only gotten wilder. Here are ten insane dog movies you won't believe exist, but believe me, they very much do.
Sherlock Bones: Undercover Dog (1994)
This film starts a trend that will stick around on this list, which is dogs acting as highly efficient members of crime-fighting organizations. Maybe we have Turner and Hooch to thank, but it seems like the days of dogs just playing sports have faded, and dogs stopping criminals and solving murders is the new go-to.
As is the case in this film, where a dog detective that can talk to humans must enlist a young boy to help him rescue his kidnapped partner. However, the dog must keep his ability to talk to humans a secret, so the boy has to deal with looking crazy for the whole movie. It's all in the name of justice.
Zoltan: Hound Of Dracula (1978)
Don't let the fact that Dracula gets his name in the title as well fool you, the famous count plays second fiddle to his dog in a big way. The film, shockingly, follows the vampire canine as it traverses Gothic Europe biting other animals and even some people.
The film is actually a pretty interesting piece of '70s horror. Clearly a product of so many takes on Dracula having been explored already, there are a lot of weird, horrifying ideas being explored in this one.
My Ghost Dog (1997)
On this list, the dogs are either cops, ghosts, or both, but we'll get to that later. Here, we have appropriately titled My Ghost Dog. A teen's dog returns as a ghost to help him and his family get their lives sorted out. The ghostly dog does the obvious, like thwarts bullies and comforts the teen, but it also somehow manages to help the boy's dad win a custody battle.
Ghost dog doesn't stop there though. He, of course, takes the time to play wingman in helping the socially awkward dad find and woo a new love.
Good Boy (2003)
In a plot lifted by Dragon Ball Z and later recycled in part for Boss Baby, this film is about a boy's epic adventure when he learns that dogs are actually aliens fully able to communicate. The discovery comes when a dog lands on Earth, hoping to find that the dogs already here have completed their mission to take over the Earth.
Add on the fact that this film somehow sports some decent names like Mathew Broderick, Donald Faison, and Molly Shannon, and the fact that it is completely boring becomes all the more disheartening.
My Dog The Space Traveler (2014)
This film has the simplest dog movie plot of them all. A boy's dog runs away from home and he has to get his friends and family to help find the dog and bring him back home. There is a small change to the classic form. The family dog actually went through an interdimensional portal in the backyard.
Now, as you are likely jumping out of your seat to rush to the nearest place you can buy this one, I have to let the air back out of your sails. The dog returns on his own accord, bringing clues of the universe's imminent destruction, or something. Unfortunately, space and dimension travel happens mostly off-screen, turning this crazy movie into a boring one.
Ghost Dog: A Detective Tail (2003)
There's an odd trend on display with many of these films where they go through multiple titles, ultimately having the official title listed online being far different than what shows up on the poster. This is especially a crime in the case of this film, as there is no chance I will be calling a movie Dog Gone when I have the option of calling it Ghost Dog: A Detective Tail.
The film follows a police officer named Kyle and his police dog Howie. When Howie is killed, his spirit comes back in the body of a criminal, to help his human partner and best friend solve his murder.
Cyberdog (2003)
Is there any character in film cooler than this golden retriever? He's got sunglasses, terminator vision, and an absolute cannon bicep.
Appropriately titled Cyberdog on the poster and Cybermutt everywhere else, the film follows the titular dog, named Rex, as he is given superpowers by a quirky scientist played by a surely regretful Judd Nelson. With his new powers, Rex becomes a target of a genius looking to harness the powers for evil.
Bailey's Billions (2005)
This film is an enigma, even for this list. A millionaire dies and leaves her fortune to the talking dog Bailey, which, naturally, leads to a group of villains hatching a plan adopt the dog, therefore claiming the fortune. There's a lot to unpack here.
In this film's universe, a talking dog is not that odd, to the point that an entire inheritance can be left to it, but it can still be adopted like any dog in normal life. Why can't this dog go get an apartment or a full doghouse? He's a millionaire, let him just go spend all that money. I want that movie.
Russell Madness (2015)
When a small Russell Terrier finds himself longing for a family, he does what any of us would do and becomes a professional wrestler.
Managed by a fast-talking monkey, Russell (yes, that is his name) skips straight to interspecies match-ups and takes on human wrestlers, including current WWE World Tag-Team Champion John Morrison, who gets absolutely embarrassed by this dog. Sign this Russell Terrier already Vince McMahon.
Karate Dog (2004)
Part karate master, part cop, all dog. Karate Dog follows Cho Cho, a dog voiced by a surely regretful Chevy Chase, as he teams up with detective Simon Rex (yes, really) to solve the murder of his owner and karate teacher. This movie sets up that Cho Cho is not only a karate expert but also the only dog that can easily speak to humans. Props to the film for just smashing that hurdle immediately.
Necessary to mention in regards to a movie of this magnitude is that the dog actually does karate. It is maddening, with CGI allowing Cho Cho to flip and move in a million ways, dodging ninja stars and delivering roundhouse kicks left and right. It's absolutely stunning.