Wrestling legend Hulk Hogan has cropped up in a surprisingly high number of movie roles from Gremlins 2 to Mr. Nanny, but what are his best parts, and which were his worst? Before the likes of Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson, John Cena, and even The Girl on the 3rd Floor's Philip Jack Brooks (formerly CM Punk) transitioned from the campy theatrics of professional wrestling into the more mainstream arena of movie stardom, Hulk Hogan was one of the earliest wrestling icons to bring his acting talent to Hollywood.
Long before he was best known for suing Gawker, Hogan was a world-famous wrestling icon and a wannabe actor who tried his hand at self-aware comedy, un-ironic action stardom, and even one ill-judged Christmas movie. With fourteen movies to his name, it’s no small task to go through Hogan’s entire filmography.
That said, the prospect of ranking the legendary wrestler’s movies makes this deep dive into his questionable screen history well worth the effort. Starting with a minor role in Rocky III way back in 1982 and ending with his most recent onscreen outing, 2011’s Gnomeo and Juliet, Hulk Hogan’s film history is a land of contrasts, to say the least, and the movies that the Hulkster has cropped up in vary in quality as much as tone.
The Ultimate Weapon
The worst of Hogan’s many weak efforts, 1998’s The Ultimate Weapon combines some impressively ignorant depictions of international politics with flat leading performances and drab, leaden pacing into a big-budget failure that makes Little Hercules look like a masterpiece.
Mr. Nanny
Most notable for ripping off the already pretty weak Mr. Mom, this family comedy sees Hogan misusing his acting talents playing (as the title implies) a male nanny. It’s a weak one-joke premise, but that wasn’t enough to stop Bautista and Cena from both ripping off this already-weak premise with The Pacifier and Playing With Fire respectively.
Little Hercules
Somehow nabbing the services of Home Alone’s John Heard and The Long Goodbye’s Elliot Gould, this embarrassing 2009 comedy saw Hulk play Zeus while the title role went to the bodybuilder of the same name. Theoretically a star vehicle for Richard “Little Hercules” Sandrak, this laugh-free dud instead sank without a trace and put his stardom to an early end.
Santa With Muscles
Starring Mila Kunis in her first major movie role, Santa With Muscles may still be the actor's worst part to date. This ill-judged family comedy sees Hogan play a billionaire whose head injury leaves him convinced he is the titular gift-giver, resulting in a thinly-veiled Home Alone rip-off which manages the impressive feat of still appearing on “worst movies ever” lists decades after it debuted in theatres.
No Holds Barred
Reviled by critics, Hogan’s big-screen debut made the mistake of letting the actor essentially play his wrestling persona in an ill-judged wrestling-centric action movie. A handful of solid fight sequences can’t make up for this one’s terminal lack of imagination.
McCinsey’s Island
Almost entirely forgotten (with no reviews to date on Rotten Tomatoes), this kid’s comedy sees Hogan play a secret agent who goes up against Bond girl Grace Jones in his search for some mythical buried treasure. As far as Hogan’s kid flicks go, it’s no 3 Ninja: High Noon At Mega Mountain, but it’s at least not notably bad enough to be singled out for "worst movie ever" lists even decades later.
The Secret Agent Club
Hogan is miscast here as a toyshop owner/secret agent, but this kid-friendly spin on True Lies nonetheless gets a few fun scenes from his kids using the booby-trapped toys that Hogan's shop stocks to rescue their hulking dad from terrorists.
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Suburban Commando
Better than most of Hogan’s family comedies, this sci-fi action flick benefits from a surprisingly solid supporting cast in the form of The Shining’s Shelley Duvall and Doc Brown himself Christopher Lloyd. It’s not perfect, but with action, a decent cast, and a handful of laughs, this one sure beat Santa With Muscles.
Spy Hard
Most notable for being scripted by the then-very-young screenwriters of Disaster Movie, Spy Hard remains the cleverest and funniest parody ever put together by the infamous Friedberg and Seltzer. Unfortunately, that’s not saying a lot, and this 1996 dud only boasts a handful of funny moments, and an admittedly solid spoof of Bond theme songs courtesy of Weird Al Yankovich. Hogan’s role is limited to a brief cameo, but as is often the case, this proves to be a plus for the talented comedic performer.
3 Ninjas: High Noon At Mega Mountain
The 3 Ninjas movies provided solid thrills for 90s kids and have earned the nostalgic reputation they enjoy, but this third outing is the weakest of the bunch thanks to the absence of the original movie’s stars. Hogan puts in a fine autopilot performance, but he’s outmatched by both Ernest himself Jim Varney and Loni Anderson’s campy turn as the villainess who launched a thousand puberties.
Gnomeo and Juliet
Released in 2011, Gnomeo and Juliet is a bizarre 3D animated comedy starring two pieces of lawn furniture who are secretly sentient and re-enact the classic Shakespeare love story of the title. It’s also a musical set to the tunes of Elton John that features a happy ending rewritten by a statue of Shakespeare and a minor role for the Hulkster. As this summation implies, it’s hard to dislike such an ambitiously zany project.
Muppets From Space
One of the lesser 90s Muppets movies, Muppets From Space may struggle to match the height set by Muppet Treasure Island and Muppet Christmas Carol, but this 1999 family comedy is still a solid, charming effort from the Henson workshop. Hogan is good in his small role and the surrounding movie is a better-than-usual bit of anarchic comedy for all ages.
Rocky III
A solid entry into the boxing drama franchise, Rocky III may not scale the legendary heights of the original but the threequel did solidify Rocky’s friendship with Apollo and offer a legendary antagonist in the form of Mr. T, not to mention featuring the iconic "Eye of the Tiger" on its soundtrack. The Hulkster puts in a cameo essentially playing himself as Thunderlips, a wrestling champ who Rocky faces down in a charity bout.
Gremlins 2: The New Batch
The lone legitimate masterpiece in the Hulkster’s filmography, Joe Dante’s Gremlins sequel is a seminal piece of meta-comedy, an ingenious satire of corporate America and creatively bankrupt movies, and a damn fun monster movie to boot. Hulk Hogan plays himself as an angry theater patron whose viewing of Gremlins 2 has been disrupted by the gremlins themselves in a meta-joke that remains as fresh and funny as it was 30 years ago.