It’s Halloween month, and imagining yourself in a horror movie to see if you’d survive is the ideal game for fall evenings, especially if you’re quarantining with a bestie. But what about kicking things up a notch and imagining popular sitcom characters in horror movies, to see if they’d survive a nasty horde of zombies or a Satanic cult?
Who’d make it till the end of a horror movie, from How I Met Your Mother? Would it be Ted, who is quite incompetent unless he is surrounded by friends? Or would it be the brave Robin who’s not afraid to get her hands dirty in a fight? Here’s a fun ranking of HIMYM characters based on who’s most likely to survive a horror movie.
Barney
Let’s face it Barney would be too busy keeping his suit clean to actually notice if he’s being followed by a demon or a dangerous witch. The shallow and look-obsessed friend in a movie is usually the first one to go, and within the HIMYM squad that’s definitely Barney. From his expensive cravat to his insane collection of tailored and designer suits, everything about him screams, ‘look at me.’ He loves being flamboyant and is naturally ostentatious and that’s the worst trait you can have in a horror movie. Barney simply can’t seem to blend in and that makes him a really easy target.
Ted
Ted is an architect so he may just have the basic functional skills to keep the demons out, however he’s also the most indecisive person on the show and lacks self-reliance. Sure, he’s book smart and may be an asset when it comes to planning an escape or even creating an efficient underground bunker.
But he may not be so useful in case of sudden attacks or even have the resilience to deal with a serial killer. Ted really needs his friends to function right and without them he’s almost useless, so in a horror movie his chances are pretty bleak.
Tracy
Fans may not know a lot about Tracy but she was definitely very smart. Probably even smarter than Ted. She’s also very clear-headed and has her priorities right. Remember when she saw through Barney’s attempts to sleep with her and identified his situation as a cry for help? In fact, it was after his and Tracy’s chat that Barney begins working on The Robin for his playbook, which is a move that helps him get close to Robin. In a horror movie Tracy would probably be the one with the solutions, or at least she would be the one who’d see a danger coming long before anyone else does. She also has a degree in Economics and being good at math is a really handy skill for surviving demons or bloodthirsty zombies.
Zoey
The best thing about Zoey is that she copes amazingly well with nasty surprises which is great because steady nerves go a long way in surviving a horrific situation involving supernatural entities. Plus, she’s a huge risk-taker. Remember when she chained herself to a 100-year-old redwood stone, or stole a police horse, and even stole a whole van full of rabbits from a beauty company?
This is key to surviving an attack because sometimes taking the right risks can save lives. She’s also flexible and does not take herself too seriously. Even after living a very comfortable life with the super wealthy captain for years, she moves in with some sketchy roommates. This means she is quick to adjust to new surroundings, and it could come in handy while escaping a monster.
Marshall
Marshall aka Big Fudge is big and though he can physically dominate a slapping contest or a hot dog eating competition, it’s not entirely clear how skillful he would be in surviving a horror movie. In a movie like Ready Or Not where there’s literally a man hunt involved, Marshall may not have much chances as it would be difficult for him to find a hiding spot due to his gait. Plus, he’s also quite panicky and depends on Lily a lot when it comes to day-to-day decisions.
Mickey
Lily’s dad Mickey may be a lousy parent and an unambitious person in general, but surviving a tricky horror movie could just be his cup of tea. Especially if there’s a haunted maze or a scavenger hunt involved.
Mickey is a board game designer so he should ideally be very skilled in strategy-building and thinking outside of the box. This could be a great skill, especially in a horror movie like A Quiet Place or The Village where creating a plan of escape is important.
Stella
Interestingly, though Ted’s girlfriend Stella got a lot of screen time on the show, fans are still clueless about who she really is. It has been established that she has an agreeable personality, she is smart, friendly, and gets along well with people. But Stella can also be quite deceitful for her own personal gains; remember when she lied to Ted about moving to New York and about getting back together with her ex? But this personality trait could come in handy when there’s an actual demon or ghost who has to be kept at bay. Manipulating realities or setting up decoys is a crucial part of tackling the supernatural and Stella may just be good at it.
Lily
Lily is a lot tougher than she looks, plus she is very brave. She's proved multiple times that she’s not afraid of making tough calls. In fact, Lily is a decision-maker which requires her to be impartial and objective if need be. She can be cut throat even when her friends are involved and that’s a great trait because when confronted with an unpredictable danger, a healthy sense of priorities is crucial. Her husband Marshall and her friend Ted are actually quite lacking in decisiveness and often turn to Lily to make their decisions for them, so they would probably rely on Lily while escaping a monster as well.
Brad
Brad may have quite a few flaws and has often lied and tricked the gullible Marshall, however in a horror movie, he could be a huge asset. He’s in great shape which means he could probably outrun a serial killer, or even a small horde of zombies. Much like Stella, Brad is also good at manipulating, lying, and misleading people. This could come in handy, especially if he has to deal with a particularly tricky villain, supernatural or otherwise. He has no qualms about lying and could just play dirty to survive till the end.
Robin
Robin has proved time and again that she’s tougher than her peers. She grew up in Canada and is quite adept at navigating wilderness, she had even survived in the wild as a teenager just to impress her dad, so she would not be useless if the gang was stuck in a haunted forest. Robin is also pretty much up for anything, when it comes to protecting herself and her friends and is not scared of confrontation. It’s also established that she carries a gun and knows how to use it, which could come in handy.