Mr. Big was the on-again, off-again boyfriend that led to so much of Carrie Bradshaw's romantic tumult on Sex and the City, and for that many fans painted him squarely as a villain.
There were plenty of times when he became the mascot for poor bedfellows, and he did treat Carrie unfairly, but her neurotic tendencies would be taxing for anyone. Especially a reserved professional with a very demanding job, whose years of dating experience made him languid in taking big steps towards relationships.
FELT BAD FOR HIM: WHEN HE SHOWED UP AT AIDAN'S ART SHOW DRUNK
There were very few times on Sex and the City where viewers saw imbalance in Mr. Big's carefully maintained equipoise. He conducted himself with a cool confidence that was rarely ruffled, except when he showed up at Aidan's art show with his new wife Natasha.
He got inordinately drunk and began making lewd comments to Carrie, causing viewers to be as embarrassed as she was at the sight of him acting so boorish.
HATED HIM: WHEN HE DIDN'T TELL CARRIE HE WAS GOING TO PARIS
Mr. Big may have kept his emotions close to the breast, but he also didn't share the diurnal routine of his waking hours with Carrie much in the fashion she'd prefer. He was offered a professional arrangement in Paris and he took it, without informing her how long he'd be gone.
It was easy to hate Big in the heat of the moment, as viewers overwhelmingly sided with Carrie's anger at losing him so soon after their relationship had begun to acquire sure footing, but perhaps his reservations at telling her were precisely because of the the volcanic nature of her response.
FELT BAD FOR HIM: WHEN HE CRASHED CARRIE AND AIDAN'S COUNTRY TRIP
In Season 4, Carrie and Aidan are enjoying the benefits of a more stable relationship and decide to take a long weekend at Aidan's country cabin. Carrie accustoms herself to the baking of pies and taming of squirrels only to be interrupted by a call from Big, who's despondent and in need of company.
Viewers might realize at this point that Big doesn't really seem to have any real "friends" on the series, and it's unfortunate that the only person he feels he can turn to is his ex girlfriend who's in the middle of a romantic getaway with her new beau. The only good thing to come from it is he has a cathartic mud fight with Aidan, after which everyone enjoys a civilized dinner.
HATED HIM: WHEN HE DIDN'T TELL CARRIE HE WAS MOVING TO NAPA
At the end of Season 4 Mr. Big declares that he's leaving New York City and buying a home in California's wine country, much to the incredulity of Carrie and everyone who's come to see him as an established part of the Big Apple.
Once again, he doesn't think how this will affect Carrie's feelings, and decides that the best way to tell her is while he's pretty much leaving. Their relationship is much strained after the fact, until he gets fed up with Napa and decides to come home.
FELT BAD FOR HIM: WHEN CARRIE BLASTED HIM OVER LUNCH
When Big decided to marry Natasha, he knew he couldn't follow through the wedding without telling Carrie about it. He also knew she'd never forgive him for telling her over the phone, so he invited her to lunch to break the news.
As it turned out there wasn't ever going to be a good way to break the news to Carrie, and she wasn't mature enough to handle receiving it. She made a huge public scene and while in the spectacle managed to make him look like an imbecile.
HATED HIM: WHEN HE CHEATED ON NATASHA WITH CARRIE
Even after Big married Natasha, he still held a proverbial torch for Carrie, and encouraged her to have an affair with him even though they both knew it was a bad idea. They met in secret at different hotels so as not to be seen by anyone they knew, but even that charade couldn't be maintained.
Carrie wasn't completely blameless in their activities because by participating she was also cheating on Aidan at the time, but Big encouraged this sort of behavior because he had no respect for Aidan nor what he meant to Carrie.
FELT BAD FOR HIM: WHEN CARRIE IGNORED HE WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING
In the Sex and the City movie, Carrie and Mr. Big finally tied the knot. Big had been married twice before, and he wasn't interested in a luxurious wedding that would make Page 6 of the Society Section and depict him as a lech. He thought Carrie was in agreement with him on a guest list that wouldn't exceed 75.
Things changed after Carrie made the cover of Vogue, and suddenly the modest wedding that was just supposed to be about them became about the entire city. Big had opened up to Carrie about his anxieties and his reservations and she'd completely disregarded his feelings.
HATED HIM: WHEN HE CUT CARRIE OFF AFTER HIS HEART SURGERY
Big was known for being an emotionally unavailable man who rarely discussed his true feelings and almost never let anyone mount the high walls that protected his heart. However, when those walls were about to come down anyway due to an invasive heart surgery, he had little choice but to open up.
He consents to let Carrie take care of him and he convalesces with her, sharing his hopes and dreams for the future. However, the second he's on the mend he goes right back to being reserved and shutting Carrie out.
FELT BAD FOR HIM: WHEN CARRIE FORCED HIM TO INTRODUCE HER TO HIS MOTHER
Given that Big takes relationships at a snail's pace, he wasn't ready for Carrie to meet his mother despite her insistence. She ends up stalking him at church and forcing her way into an incredibly awkward social situation that makes all parties embarrassed.
He still wants to go on a couple's vacation with her after this travesty, but because he won't refer to her as "the one", she refuses to go on the trip. This, after he already told her, "We'll get there, you just have to have a little faith.".
HATED HIM: WHEN HE LEFT CARRIE AT THE ALTAR
The "big" day finally arrives for Carrie and Big in Sex and the City (2008), but their nuptials are dashed when she realizes upon arriving to the church that he's nowhere to be found. He's driving around in a limo, petrified of getting out of the car because he's been led to believe he's making a mistake.
Big stands Carrie up at the altar after everything they've gone through, and it's a heartbreaking moment watching him concede cold feet and Carrie completely crumple into a puddle of Vera Wang and despondency.