Alastor “Mad-Eye” Moody from Harry Potter might be one of the most intriguing professors to ever teach at Hogwarts. Given how many interesting characters had the job of Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, this is really saying a lot. While most of the time Harry knew Mad-Eye he was actually Barty Crouch Jr., the real Mad-Eye wasn’t all that different than the acting Barty Crouch Jr. was doing. While Mad-Eye himself might never have actually taught at Hogwarts, Barty Crouch Jr. did give some interesting teaching advice while at the school. And, the real Mad-Eye also had some fascinating nuggets of advice in the years Harry knew him before his death.
We’ve put together Mad-Eye Moody’s best teaching quotes.
10. “BETTER WIZARDS THAN YOU HAVE LOST BUTTOCKS, YOU KNOW.”
This is one of the quotes from the real Mad-Eye. After he is rescued from the trunk Barty Crouch Jr. was keeping him in, Mad-Eye continues to be an Auror and also a member of the Order of the Phoenix.
He is known for being paranoid, and this means he is often dispensing advice to others about how to keep themselves safe. This hilarious quote also illustrates his blunt nature and approach to life.
9. “NOTHING LIKE A NIGHTTIME STROLL TO GIVE YOU IDEAS.”
This is a quote that can be somewhat inspiring if you take it out of context. It’s definitely true that going for a walk at night can help a person unwind and focus on their thoughts. Of course, most of Mad-Eye/Barty’s nighttime wanderings were for nefarious reasons as he was plotting Voldermort’s return. But, if you ignore the context of what was going on with the Polyjuice Potion at the time, this isn’t bad advice to take.
8. “THERE’S NO COUNTER CURSE. THERE’S NO BLOCKING IT. ONLY ONE KNOWN PERSON HAS EVER SURVIVED IT.”
One of the most memorable things about Mad-Eye/Barty as a professor at Hogwarts was when he taught the Unforgivable Curses. These curses were horrible, and even seeing them performed on spiders was scarring for many of the students. He points out to Harry and his classmates that Harry is the only person who has ever survived the Killing Curse. In the world of Harry Potter, defense against the dark arts is no laughing matter.
7. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?... TEACHING.”
This scene might be the most iconic one of Mad-Eye/Barty’s in the books. During his time at Hogwarts, he employs some rather non-traditional teaching methods. While this might have been Barty Crouch Jr., it’s easy to believe Mad-Eye himself might do similar things. When he turns Malfoy into a ferret, it’s a pretty funny moment. However, using that kind of punishment on a student as a teacher is definitely not acceptable.
6. “I SAY THERE ARE SPOTS THAT DON’T COME OFF.”
This is another moment from Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire that is interesting when looking at the context. Mad-Eye as Barty Crouch Jr. says this line to Snape in reference to the Dark Mark he got when he was a Death Eater. All the while, however, Barty Crouch Jr. himself is hiding out even as he is Voldermort’s biggest supporter and ally during this time. One thing is for sure, Dumbledore should probably do a better job of vetting professors for this teaching position.
5. “I COULD TELL YOU STORIES ABOUT YOUR FATHER THAT WOULD CURL EVEN YOUR GREASY HAIR, BOY!”
Mad-Eye Moody in the Harry Potter films is definitely a memorable sort. This line is one that is said in the Goblet of Fire movie. Mad-Eye says this line to Draco Malfoy after he turns Malfoy into a ferret.
Malfoy threatens to tell his father about what happened, but Mad-Eye is clearly unfazed. While Mad-Eye might have been out of line, it’s definitely somewhat rewarding to see a professor not let Malfoy get away with being the bully he is.
4. “I’LL TEACH YOU TO CURSE SOMEBODY WHEN THEIR BACK IS TURNED!”
This is another bit of Mad-Eye teaching wisdom that he dispenses upon Malfoy before giving Malfoy his own punishment. This might not have been coming from the real Mad-Eye, but it’s clear that this is good advice.
Cursing someone when their back is turned, especially someone who isn’t trying to hurt you is a pretty low blow. At least Mad-Eye could dispense this bit of useful advice.
3. “MARVELOUS CREATURES, DRAGONS, AREN’T THEY?”
This is another line that comes from the movie, not specifically from the books. Dragons definitely are marvelous creatures. While Mad-Eye might not be teaching Care of Magical Creatures, but he does know a lot about any sort of dark creature.
While Mad-Eye might have helped Harry along the way during the Triwizard Tournament, his motives weren’t pure seeing as he was Barty Crouch Jr.
2. “WHEN IT COMES TO THE DARK ARTS, I BELIEVE IN A PRACTICAL APPROACH.”
Taking a practical approach to teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts definitely has its advantages. Professor Lupin was a great professor who also took a more hands-on approach to the subject. While some of the lessons Mad-Eye/Barty gave were useful, practicing Unforgivable Curses on minors definitely wasn’t advisable. But, given that he was actually a Death Eater, it’s not that surprising. It is surprising that Dumbledore seemed totally fine with this fact, however.
1. “CONSTANT VIGILANCE!”
This is probably the quote that Mad-Eye Moody is best known for. It’s definitely the approach he takes to teaching overall, and it’s probably pretty good advice to take when dark wizards are around. However, one interesting fact is that Mad-Eye Moody himself never says this. It’s only Barty Crouch Jr. interpretation of Alastor. In the other books that Mad-Eye Moody is in, he never says these words even if he is still a paranoid Auror who is always on the lookout for danger.