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10 Most Hilarious Quotes From The Hangover

Todd Phillips might be moving on to more serious projects now that he is directing films like Joker and the Hulk Hogan biopic, but he is mostly known for being a comedy director. Among his films like Old School, Due Date, and War Dogs, Phillips also directed The Hangover trilogy. As with most comedies, the series only went down in quality as the films continued, but the original is still held in high regard.

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The film stars Zach Galifianakis, Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, and Justin Bartha as four guys who go out to Las Vegas for a bachelor party. Like all great comedies, The Hangover has dozens of memorable quotes, so let's take a moment to appreciate some of the very best.

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10 “THIS ISN’T THE REAL CAESARS PALACE, IS IT?”

One of the funniest quotes comes near the beginning of the movie when the gang checks into Caesars Palace. The group argues about having to share beds before Phil suggests they rent the villa, which is priced at a hefty $4,200 for the night. After Stu begrudgingly hands his credit card to the front desk agent, Alan asks, “This isn’t the real Caesars Palace, is it?

The front desk attendant is obviously confused, so Alan clarifies asking if Caesar actually lived at the hotel. It’s a memorable quote and something that people who work at Caesars Palace probably get sick of hearing.

9 “IT’S AT THE CORNER OF GET A MAP AND F*** OFF.”

Matt Walsh in The Hangover

A common collaborator of Todd Phillips is actor Matt Walsh. In The Hangover, Walsh plays the character Dr. Valsh, who came in contact with the group the night they were drugged. The hospital band on Phil’s wrist led them back to the hospital and the guys pay Dr. Valsh to give them information about the night before.

After getting a clue about a chapel called The Best Little Chapel, Phil asks Dr. Valsh if he knows the address. Dr. Valsh casually responds, “I do. It’s at the corner of get a map and f*** off," which the guys certainly weren’t expecting or hoping to hear.

8 “NOT AT THE TABLE, CARLOS!”

It’s pretty common for people to get intoxicated when they go to Vegas, but the guys in The Hangover are so messed up that they can’t remember what happened the night before, thanks to alcohol (and the fact that Alan drugged them). Right when they are about to go out to look for Doug, they hear a crying and find an infant in their closet.

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Alan names him Carlos and gives the baby his sunglasses to wear. When the group is sitting by the pool trying to think of clues, Alan pretends that the baby is misbehaving and says, “not at the table, Carlos.

7 “NOT YOU, FAT JESUS. SLIDE IT ON BACK!”

After the gang is arrested for stealing a cop car, they strike a deal with the officers so they can be released in time for the wedding. In order to be set free, they volunteered to be part of a stun gun demonstration for a school field trip.

When one officer (Rob Riggle) tells  "handsome” to step forward, Alan thinks that is his queue, but Officer Franklin quickly corrects him, saying, “not you, fat Jesus. Slide it on back.” Riggle is a successful comedian and even though he had a small role in the film, he has one of the funniest lines in The Hangover.

6 “I HATE GODZILLA! I HATE HIM TOO!”

Ed Helms, Bradley Cooper and Zach Galifianakis in The Hangover

Not only do Stu, Alan, and Phil find a baby in their hotel room, but they also find an Asian man in the trunk of Doug’s car. After the gang get out of prison and are driving back towards the Strip, they hear a knocking coming from the trunk. Thinking it is their lost friend, they pull over and quickly open the trunk, but to their surprise, a full-grown nude man pops out.

The character is Mr. Chow, who plays a larger role later on in the film, but in this scene, he uses a crowbar to beat up the gang. In an attempt to reason with Mr. Chow, Alan says, “I hate Godzilla! I hate him too! I hate him! He destroys cities!” His remarks clearly didn’t put Mr. Chow at ease, who throws the crowbar at Alan and runs off.

5 “TIGERS LOVE PEPPER. THEY HATE CINNAMON.”

Ed Helms, Bradley Cooper and Zach Galifianakis in The Hangover Pepper Quote

One of the bigger mistakes the gang makes is stealing a tiger from heavyweight champion Mike Tyson. Stealing and attempting to handle a fully grown white tiger is dangerous enough, but angering Tyson could be just as dangerous.

When the gang is trying to return the tiger to Mr. Tyson, they decide to load some roofies inside a steak, which Alan sprinkles with pepper. Stu asks Alan why he is peppering the steak, to which Alan responds, “tigers love pepper. They hate cinnamon.” Obviously, there isn’t any scientific proof to back up his statement, but it’s funny nonetheless.

4 “I LOOK LIKE A NERDY HILLBILLY!”

Each member of the gang was negatively affected by Alan drugging them, but Stu arguably got the worst of it (besides Doug). Stu not only got hitched while he was under the influence, but he also lost a tooth. Losing a tooth would be a big deal to anybody, but since Stu is a dentist, it seems much worse for him than it would to the average person.

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When Stu wakes up and looks in a mirror, he utters, “I look like a nerdy hillbilly." To make matters worse, he eventually finds out that he bet Alan he could pull out his own tooth to prove how good of a dentist he was.

3 “HEY GUYS, YOU READY TO LET THE DOGS OUT?”

To most people, Alan’s fashion sense isn’t the greatest. When the guys go out for the first night, Stu, Doug, and Phil are all wearing suits, while Alan is wearing a shirt that’s a tad too small, white pants, and a man purse (a satchel). When we first see his outfit, Alan appears out of nowhere behind the guys and says, “Hey guys, you ready to let the dogs out?

Since Alan said it with such a straight face (and even did a little footwork when he sang a verse from the Baha Men’s song), the quote stuck out as one of the best in the film.

2 “WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS, STAYS IN VEGAS.”

Jeffrey Tambor in The Hangover

The phrase what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas started long before The Hangover came out in 2009, but the movie managed to put a funny twist on the saying. Before the gang leaves for Vegas, Doug’s father-in-law (played by Jeffrey Tambor) tosses him the keys to his Mercedes-Benz 220SE and says, “remember, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas”.

Doug nervously laughs and then Sid continues, “except for herpes. That s*** will come back with you.” Obviously, that infection is no laughing matter, but the way the line was delivered was unexpected and hilarious.

1 “HEY! THERE ARE SKITTLES IN THERE!”

Another one of Alan’s funniest quotes comes during the guys’ encounter with Mr. Chow. After Chow escaped from the trunk, he went back to his people to track down Phil, Stu, and Alan. Mr. Chow’s SUV unexpectedly crashes into Doug’s car, and Mr. Chow’s thugs drag the guys out of the vehicle.

Mr. Chow is looking for his purse (which contains $80,000), but got his hands on Alan’s almost empty one instead. Chow throws it on the ground and Alan exclaims, “hey! There are Skittles in there!” The entire scene is basically funny because of the way Mr. Chow makes fun of Alan, but this is one of the best lines from the scene.

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