Summary
- "There's a word for people in our situation: ghosts." - Adam. The movie begins with Adam and Barbara realizing they are dead and trying to figure out what to do next.
- "If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have had my little accident." - Miss Argentina. Miss Argentina reveals that she took her own life and is now doomed to work behind a desk in the afterlife.
- "You can't scare her. She's sleeping with Prince Valium tonight." - Lydia. Adam and Barbara try to scare the new tenants out of their home, but Lydia is unfazed because her mother is high on Valium.
The best Beetlejuice quotes show why this classic horror-comedy remains one of Tim Burton's most beloved cult favorite movies. 1988's Beetlejuice stars Michael Keaton as Beetlejuice, a malicious spirit that helps Adam (Alec Baldwin) and Barbara (Geena Davis) rid their home of the new family that moved in. Through it all, Beetlejuice himself delivers some of the best scathing quotes in the movie, tearing into everyone from the dead to the undead and never caring who he insults.
Like most films by Burton, the screenwriting was sharp, and the characters were quirky, unique, and memorable. They express themselves through a series of memorable quotes, with Adam and Barbara exasperated and the new residents of their home ranging from flamboyantly annoying to dismissive and completely over it. With some great cast members joining Keaton, including Winona Ryder, Catherine O'Hara, Jeffrey Jones, and Glenn Shadix, almost every character has some great lines that helped the movie be considered a classic. The upcoming Beetlejuice sequel will have a lot to live up to.
25 “There’s a word for people in our situation: ghosts.”
Adam
When Beetlejuice begins, the story sees Adam and Barbara realize they are dead. They have no memory of what happened and don't even know that they are dead at first. However, when the gravity of their situation starts to take form, they both try to figure out what is happening and what they need to do next. The two realize they live in their old house, but can't leave. When Barbara mentions their "situation," Adam simply breaks down their predicament, which sets up the movie. He very matter-of-factly reaches the conclusion that they are ghosts, and it is time to figure out what they are supposed to do about it.
24 "If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn’t have had my little accident."
Miss Argentina
When Adam and Barbara learn they can go to the "other side," they see it is an office building with a waiting room. In that waiting room, a lot of people sit waiting to find out what is next for them — from a football team who died in an auto accident to a man who was clearly run over by a car. They finally hear their number called and go to the receptionist, who happens to be the former Miss Argentina.
As Adam and Barbara argue their case, Miss Argentina relates to them, but she lets them know there is nothing she can do. She then reveals that because she took her own life — her "little accident" — she's doomed to an eternity working behind a desk to help with the bureaucracy of the afterlife.
23 "You can’t scare her. She’s sleeping with Prince Valium tonight."
Lydia
Adam and Barbara begin their meticulous plans to scare the new tenants out of their beloved home. It might not be so bad if the tenants were more like the goth girl Lydia. However, her parents are a little on the weird side, with her mother very eccentric and wanting to redecorate the quaint house with art-house decor. They want nothing to do with this and begin haunting the family — to no avail. Lydia seems amused and willing to help them, but she admits on this specific night that they won't do anything to disturb Delia, Lydia's mom, because she has already taken her Valium and is numb to the entire situation.
22 “Please, they’re dead. It’s a little late to be neurotic.”
Delia
Delia is the mother (played in Beetlejuice by Catherine O'Hara), and she wants to turn this old home into a new temple for her bizarre and eccentric works of art. Her husband seems like he has given up on caring and Lydia is ready to get out of there as soon as she can. However, once the family learns there are ghosts there, instead of running, they decide they want to communicate with the ghosts and possibly control them. Lydia tries to explain that they don't want their home changed and Delia doesn't care. As she says, they are dead, so it's too late for them to be neurotic about the situation.
21 “If you act now, you get a free demon possession with every exorcism.”
Beetlejuice
Beetlejuice is many things in the movie. He is a poltergeist, a troublemaker, and wishes he could be a lady's man. However, he is also almost the exact same as a shyster. He isn't just a demon that shows up when someone says his name three times, like Candyman. Beetlejuice is someone whose sole purpose in life is to sell himself to people who need help. When he sees Adam and Barbara need help but seems unwilling to trust him, he goes on a long rant about what all he can offer them if they hire him. This specific line sounds like it comes straight out of a late-night Shopper's Network ad — but Beetlejuice is selling himself.
20 "Barb, Honey... We're Dead. I Don't Think We Have Much To Worry About Anymore."
Adam
For a couple that had just died, Adam and Barbara didn't seem overly upset about it. It was more of an inconvenience, as opposed to a traumatic event. Their conversations about their predicament make for some of the best Beetlejuice quotes, with the dead-pan discussion of death like it was a leaky garage roof juxtaposing the bombastic lines from Keaton's Beetlejuice.
This specific Beetlejuice quote is a strange and ironic silver-lining statement that showcases how the couple viewed life — and the afterlife — with a glass-half-full attitude. All they really had to contend with was an annoying family muscling in on their home, but the trade-off is a drastic reduction in daily headaches and life concerns.
19 "I Know Just As Much About The Supernatural As I Do About Interior Design."
Otho
The character of Otho is a friend of Delia who is working with the Deetz family to redecorate the inside of their new home. He claims to know a lot about the supernatural, which he explains to Delia and Charles after they agree to invite Maxie Dean over to their house. Otho says, “I know just as much about the supernatural as I do about interior design,” which sums up his personality and talents quite well. Out of everyone in the movie, Otho is the most over-confident, but he is also a salesman, just like Beetlejuice. He just doesn't have the same stomach to follow through when things get tough.
18 “Let's Turn On The Juice And See What Shakes Loose!”
Beetlejuice
As unpleasant as the Deetzes are, it makes sense why Adam and Barbara want them out of their home, no matter the cost. Beetlejuice is creepy enough in his human form, but later in the movie, he transforms into a snake with a giant head to scare the Deetz's. Right before he goes into the mortal world, he says, “Let’s turn on the juice and see what shakes loose.” The line comes just moments before one of the most iconic scenes in the movie, signaling that this particular ghost isn't quite like others in the cinematic world. This is a horror comedy, and the horror moments remain shocking up until the scary Beetlejuice ending.
17 “It's Showtime!”
Beetlejuice
The characters in Beetlejuice are quick to find out that getting help from the titular ghost does more harm than good. Unfortunately, Lydia doesn't have a choice near the end of the film after Otho performs a séance to summon Adam and Barbara. This causes the couple to quickly decay once brought into the mortal world, so Lydia agrees to marry Beetlejuice so that he will save her new friends. After she says “Beetlejuice” for the third time, he stretches out his arms and says, “It’s Showtime” as lightning strikes in the background. The line is among the most iconic Beetlejuice quotes, and featured in the family-friendly animated series that debuted shortly after.
16 “I’m Trying To Cut Down, Myself."
Char Man
Early on in the film, Adam and Barbara discover the Handbook for the Recently Deceased and decide to travel to the Netherworld. Once they got there, they discovered a waiting room filled with other folks who had died in different ways. Adam sits down next to a gentleman burnt to a crisp, who offers him a cigarette. Adam says he doesn’t smoke, and the man replies, “I’m trying to cut down myself.” It was an obvious bit of satiric irony, and the look of the man burned to death still smoking adds to the punchline.
15 “I've Seen The Exorcist About 167 Times, And It Keeps Getting Funnier Every Single Time I See It!”
Beetlejuice
Soon after Barbara and Adam realize they are dead, a new family moves into their home. Existing as ghosts, Barbara and Adam want the obnoxious family gone, so they can spend eternity in peace in their home. To do so, they hire Beetlejuice, who advertises himself as a “bio-exorcist.” After saying his name three times, the couple ends up inside Adam’s miniature town, where they find Michael Keaonts "Bio-Exorcist" waiting. Barbara wants to hear his credentials, and Beetlejuice's reply is a list of some of the most disturbing things imaginable.
“Well, I attended Julliard, I lived through the Black Plague and had a pretty good time during that. I’ve seen The Exorcist about 167 times, and it keeps getting funnier every single time I see it! Not to mention the fact that you’re talking to a dead guy. Now what do you think? You think I’m qualified?”
14 “I'm The Ghost With The Most, Babe!”
Beetlejuice
One of the first times Lydia interacts with Beetlejuice, the poltergeist is tanning from the lights on a strip club in Adam’s miniature town. Lydia comes to talk to Beetlejuice and asks if he is a ghost, to which the character replies, “I’m the ghost with the most, babe!" Beetlejuice then tries to get Lydia to say his name three times, to no avail. The two characters then play charades so that Lydia can figure out his name, which also makes for a comedic scene, with Beetlejuice conjuring up a beetle and a carton of orange juice. It was a fun moment when Lydia and Beetlejuice connected for the first time.
13 “Never Trust The Living.”
Juno
When Adam and Barbara go to see their caseworker in the afterlife, Juno, she reprimands them for their recent decisions. Not only did the couple try to get help from Beetlejuice, but they also ended up being photographed by Lydia. They also allowed Otho to steal their copy of the Handbook For The Recently Deceased, which could cause major problems for the dead. Confused as to how Otho got their copy of the book, Juno explained, “Never trust the living.” She was always quite blunt when she talked with Barbara and Adam, but most of the time, she was also right.
12 “Are You 'Night Of The Living Dead' Under There? Like, All Bloody Veins And Pus?"
Lydia
Part of the charm of Beetlejuice is the relationship between Adam, Barbara, and Lydia. When Adam and Barbara first try scaring off the Deetz family, they simply take some sheets and cover themselves to look like ghosts. Lydia isn't scared, remarking “I'm not scared of sheets. Are you gross under there? Are you 'Night of the Living Dead' under there? Like, all bloody veins and pus?” Not only did this reference George A. Romero’s Night of the Living Dead, but it was the first real interaction between the three, leading to them working together later on to help out with all their personal issues.
11 “I Would Rather Talk About… DAY-O… DAY-O!”
Delia
Out of all the scenes in Beetlejuice, the dinner scene featuring the Banana Boat Song is possibly the most well-known. It occurs when Charles invites his business associates over for dinner. The topic of ghosts and the paranormal quickly comes up in conversation, with Lydia explaining she has seen ghosts in their house. Delia wants to change the subject and says, “I would rather talk about…Day-O… Day-O!” Catherine O’Hara then lip-syncs the Banana Boat Song by Harry Belafonte as all the dinner members start dancing uncontrollably. The scene ends with their shrimp dinners turning into hands and grabbing their faces, before throwing them backward.
10 “I Myself Am Strange And Unusual.”
Lydia
Lydia is a goth teenager who enjoys photography and shows a special interest in the afterlife, ghosts, and all things paranormal. It might be a phase, but the eccentric nature of her family might have something to do with it as well. Needless to say, she is thrilled when she realizes her house has two ghosts living in it. While explaining to Adam and Barbara how she is able to see them, she tells them that the Handbook For The Recently Deceased says that “living people ignore the strange and unusual,” further revealing, “I myself am strange and unusual.”
9 “Don't Mind Her. She's Still Upset That Somebody Dropped A House On Her Sister."
Otho
Before the infamous musical dinner sequence, the characters are engaged in conversation, while Otho is gloating about how much he knows about the paranormal.
Otho claims he was one of New York’s leading paranormal researchers. This leads Beryl to say, “Paranormal, is that what they’re calling your kind these days?” Otho quickly responds with the quip, “Don’t mind her. She’s still upset that somebody dropped a house on her sister,” which is obviously a reference to The Wizard of Oz. It is a fun back-and-forth that shows that Otho is not someone to mess around with.
8 “Thanks, I've Been Feeling A Little Flat!”
Road Kill Man
Since Barbara and Adam have trouble adjusting to being dead, they visit their caseworker named Juno. They enter a waiting room, where they meet several people who have died in horrible ways. They see a smoker who is burned to a crisp, a hunter with a shrunken head, and even a woman cut completely in half. When it’s time to see Juno, they are called in by a man who looks to have been run over by a semi-truck, since he is completely flat. Adam tells him he looks fine, to which the man responds, “Thanks, I’ve been feeling a little flat.” It seems humor still exists in the afterlife.
7 “A Little Gasoline... Blowtorch... No Problem!”
Delia
Catherine O’Hara’s character in Beetlejuice is very over-dramatic and has a passion for modern art. Not caring what her husband or stepdaughter wants, Delia decides to completely redesign their new home. When they first arrive at the Maitlands’ home, Delia and Otho begin spray-painting walls that need to be torn down, all while thinking of ways to “improve” the house. At one point, Delia says that all she needs is “A little gasoline… blowtorch… no problem.” The character is eccentric, to say the least, and this line is a prime example.
6 "The Only One I Think I Can Deal With Is Edgar Allan Poe's Daughter. I Think She Understands Me."
Beetlejuice
This particular quote betrays Beetlejuice's trickery and penchant for lying in order to get what he wants — or to misdirect attention away from himself. While the idea of Edgar Allan Poe's daughter being possibly one of the few who could possibly understand this particular ghost, in reality, no such person existed. In truth, Poe had no known children, legitimate or otherwise, though the possibility of the latter might still exist. Whatever the case, it is obvious that Beetlejuice is merely trying to be funny, as opposed to factual.