Prepare for a 3-Hour Tour of 'Gilligan’s Island'

This just in! Hollywood has found someone to make a movie from an original idea – too bad it isn’t a NEW original idea. Warner Bros and Atlas Entertainment have drawn the short straw decided to move forward with the big screen adaptation of Lost Gilligan’s Island.

Writing the screenplay will be Brad Copeland, who is also writing scripts for the Flight of the Navigator remake, Monster Squad and the upcoming Yogi Bear adaptation. If that isn’t enough to get you on the excitement train, then you’ll be happy to hear he also wrote Wild Hogs *thud*.

On board to produce for Atlas Entertainment is Charles Roven (Batman Begins, The Dark Knight) and Richard Suckle; Sherwood Schwartz, the show’s original producer and composer of the main title theme, will serve as Executive Producer with his son Lloyd Schwartz. Jon Berg will watch over the project for Warner Bros.

Roven said that he wants to put a contemporary twist on the well-known story and characters and will not look for a director until after the script is finished. He also wants to start production in 2011. Roven had this to say about a Gilligan’s Island movie:

"The characters are so good. We think it's going to be a great story to transport these cultural icons to the modern day."

Gilligan’s Island, for our younger readers, was the last generation’s Lost, just without so many characters. Still, the basics of the story are the same – people stranded on a deserted island with no way to get home. In this case, 7 people who set out on a 3-hour sightseeing cruise get caught up in a storm and wrecked their boat. For the next 3 years and 98 episodes, the crew and sightseers embark upon a journey fraught with humor, guest stars, cannibals and almost-rescues.

On the island were Gilligan (Bob Denver), The Skipper (Alan Hale Jr), The Professor (Russell Johnson), Mary Ann (Dawn Wells), Ginger (Tina Louise), Thurston Howell III (Jim Backus) and his wife, Lovey Howell (Natalie Schafer).  There have been no casting announcements yet, but Schwartz let it be known that he would be interested in seeing Michael Cera as the sweet, bell-bottom-wearing klutz, Gilligan.

I can’t help but wonder if Roven has, himself, been stranded on a remote island in the Pacific for the past fifteen years. Has he not witnessed what happens when studios try to “transport these cultural icons to the modern day?" Ladies and gentleman of the court, I will now present you with evidence that Charles Roven and Hollywood are happy to teach us our mistakes but never learn from their own.

Exhibit A: Land of the Lost

Exhibit B: McHale’s Navy

Exhibit C: Fat Albert

Exhibit D: The Flintstones

Exhibit E: The Beverly Hillbillies

And those are just the TV shows-turned-feature-films that I think were the worst offenders of the bunch. I didn’t even bring up such “classics” as: Mr. Bean, Get Smart, Dragnet, Dudley Do-Right, George of the Jungle, Mr. Magoo, The Brady Bunch, Lost in Space, Wild Wild West, The Saint and Miami Vice! In fact, I count forty-nine TV shows that have been turned into 'modern' films with at least ten more slated for future release in the next couple of years.

Each attempt at "updating" these properties seems to be worse than the last and yet Hollywood is wetting their pants to bring us another serving of mediocre pudding.

What are your thoughts on a modern setting for the 7 stranded castaways on Gilligan’s Island?

Oh! I forgot to mention Rocky & Bullwinkle, My Favorite Martian and The Honeymooners. I dare you to get THAT taste out of your mouth!

Follow me on Twitter @Walwus

Source: Variety

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