Romances on Game of Thrones rarely go well, and Jon Snow learned that fact more than anyone. Jon had significant romances with two women in series and both ended with her dying in his arms. The first was Ygritte, the tough Wildling and the second was Daenerys Targaryen, the Dragon Queen.
Both of these romances seemed like they could allow Jon to have a happy ending and live a good life with someone he loves. It didn’t work out in either case, but which romance was really meant to be. Here are some of the reasons Jon belonged with Daenerys and some reasons it was always Ygritte.
Daenerys: Dragons
As soon as Daenerys brought three dragons back into the world, she instantly became one of the most powerful people in the show. As the dragons grew, she proved to be the only one who could control them. But then she met Jon Snow.
Early on, the dragons seem to take a liking to Jon in a way that they don’t with most people. Little did he know it was due to his Targaryen blood. But the fact that he was able to ride alongside Daenerys atop one of her dragons hinted at a special connection.
Ygritte: She’s Not Related To Him
However, romantic Jon and Daenerys might seem to be with each other, there is always a very big and disturbing issue that needs to be addressed. We find out that these two are related as aunt and nephew just as we see them having sex for the first time. The fact that anyone would cheer for them as a couple is a little weird.
In this regard, Ygritte has a distinct advantage over Daenerys in that she is not related to Jon. Sure, they have issues in their relationship, like her trying to kill him, but at least it's not incest.
Daenerys: Leaders
It’s easy to see a lot of similarities in the paths Jon and Daenerys took throughout the series. Both started out as disrespected and lowly individuals who gradually gained strength, helped those in need and became beloved leaders. These qualities suggest they could have made a great team.
Though their individual teams don’t always see eye-to-eye, these two have a talent for inspiring people. Daenerys managed to convince the entire Dothraki army to follow her while Jon became the leader of the Wildlings, despite serving in the Night's Watch. Imagine what they could do ruling Westeros together.
Ygritte: Eye Opening
The series often showed that there was more complexity to the stories of good versus evil. Jon Snow learned that early on and Ygritte was largely responsible for opening his eyes to that notion. As a member of the Night’s Watch., he viewed the Wildlings as barbaric enemies that needed to be defeated.
Ygritte showed him that the Wildlings are just people like him and all they want to do is live free and survive. His love for her helped him see the error in his ways and the ways of the Night’s Watch.
Daenerys: Common Goals
Despite the way things ended up with Daenerys, she and Jon largely seemed to have the same ideas of what it means to be a ruler. Daenerys originally sought to sit on the Iron Throne as a benevolent ruler who could genuinely do good for her people. Jon was the same way, thinking not of himself, but how best to serve the people he commands.
These common goals linked Jon and Daenerys as good people. Tragedy and circumstances changed Daenerys for the worse, but if they had matched up their common goals earlier and been on the same page, they could have done a lot of good together.
Ygritte: Kept Him Grounded
Jon was a born leader and excelled in the role, but when politics came into the equation, he found himself in trouble. As soon as Jon found out that he was the rightful heir to the Iron Throne, his life took a steep nosedive that he never recovered from.
Jon is very much like Ned Stark in that he is not meant to be in the middle of all the fighting over the Iron Throne. Ygritte was someone who kept him grounded and where he belongs. She called him out on his ignorance and chipped away at the notion that he is special because he belongs to a certain family.
Daenerys: Power Couple
It’s hard to deny there would be a more powerful union in Westeros than that of Daenerys and Jon. She has dragons, a massive army, the right family name and the ability to lead people. Jon is a famous warrior and hero, the leader of the North, and a noble man.
Not everyone is happy to see these two together at first, but if they had enough time, it’s quite likely they could have gotten most of Westeros on their side. This could have also meant for a more harmonious relationship with the North and King’s Landing.
Ygritte: Made Him A Better Man
When Jon and Ygritte first meet, they are enemies. Jon is hunting the Wildlings and Ygritte is willing to kill any member of the Night’s Watch she comes across. Despite the differences, their connection grows quickly and Ygirtte gradually and subtlety begins teaching him to be a better man.
While there are some positives you can point to with Jon's relationship with Daenerys, it's hard to say that he comes out the other side as a better person. With Ygritte, however, despite the tragedy of her death, she does make Jon a better person and one who is willing to fight for the innocent.
Daenerys: Uniting Ice And Fire
Part of the reason it was so easy to cheer for Jon and Daenerys as a couple despite their obvious issues was that they seemed destined to be together. Before the show even began, fans of the book theorized that their union would be the joining of "ice and fire".
Together Jon and Daenerys could fulfill the prophecy and save Westeros. While it didn't exactly work out like that, it still feels like they were somehow meant to be and that they are two important sides of the same coin.
Ygritte: The North
Despite the prophecies and despite the fact that Jon is the true heir to the Iron Throne, the series ends with him returning to the North where his story began. While some fans felt this was a lackluster ending for the hero, it is pretty fitting.
Daenerys and Ygritte represent two paths for Jon. Daenerys is the path to sitting on the Iron Throne and ruling. Ygritte represents his path of living in the North. Whatever anyone else thinks is right for Jon, he knows the right path for himself in the end. He chooses Ygritte and the North.