Friends thrived on the chemistry of its six titular characters, creating a unique mix of intimacy and humor that made the show a television juggernaut. Each friend was unique, but none was quirkier or more eccentric than Phoebe Buffay.
Played by Lisa Kudrow, Phoebe marched to the beat of her own drum and never cared about what anyone thought of her. Phoebe is a fan favorite, with audiences loving her independence and uniqueness. Her journey and development throughout the show's ten seasons are significant, teaching many valuable life lessons and cementing her as one of television's most significant and original characters.
A Stable Job Isn't Always The Best
Phoebe has a myriad of jobs throughout Friends. She works as a secretary, telemarketing executive, catering waitress, set extra, and, of course, masseuse. Despite her friends' opinions, Phoebe seems to enjoy the freedom that comes with not having a stable job.
Most people value the benefits and security that a stable job provides, but that doesn't mean not having one is a sign of failure. People should feel able to pursue whatever career they desire, whether as part of a huge conglomerate or as a freelancer carving their own path.
Don't Be Afraid Of Dating
Unlike her friends, who have several committed relationships throughout the show, Phoebe only has two, David and Mike. Otherwise, she spends her time dating a colorful selection of men, some of whom are even quirkier than her. Still, Phoebe isn't in a rush to find "the one," unlike Monica or Rachel.
Often, people are afraid of dating because of what others might think. Their reservations can also come from a place of mistrust for the people they meet. However, dating can be a positive experience that might lead to new relationships, albeit not necessarily romantic.
Mind Your Alcohol
Like the other main characters, Phoebe often got herself in sticky situations. Most of her unfortunate adventures stemmed from her quirky personality, but on occasion, her drinking made her act out. Phoebe wasn't an alcoholic, but she did drink more than the average person.
It's okay to have a glass of wine at the end of the day, but people should always drink responsibly. Not many great things happen while under the influence, which becomes clearer with age. Adults should always be mindful of their alcohol because it can lead to embarrassing or potentially dangerous situations.
Take Pride In Your Uniqueness
Phoebe marched to the beat of her own drum. Everything about her, from her clothes to her hobbies, stood out, and, at times, even her friends seemed somewhat embarrassed of her. Yet, Phoebe never allowed anyone to change her, and she never stopped doing what she wanted.
Fans should follow her example. Life is too short to worry about what others think or say, especially if their opinions try to repress someone's likes. Sometimes, even friends and family will take issue with someone's decisions, but people should be allowed to enjoy life however they see fit, as long as they're not hurting others.
Don't Let The Past Define You
All the friends had somewhat difficult childhoods, but Phoebe's is, by far, the most traumatic. Following her father's abandonment, her mother's suicide, and her step-father's imprisonment, she becomes homeless and is forced to mug to survive. At one point, she stabs a cop and lives in a run-down Buick LaSabre.
Nevertheless, Phoebe is cheerful and hopeful of the future, never allowing her difficult past to limit or define her. Phoebe is an example of resilience and overcoming setbacks and traumas. It's genuinely impressive that someone who went through so much is still able to smile and enjoy life, but Phoebe truly is one of a kind.
Sing Your Heart Out
Phoebe's songs are one of the best parts of Friends. From "Smelly Cat" to "Ode to a Pubic Hair," Phoebe's lyrics and melodies are earworms that fans can't forget.
Sure, they might not make the most sense or sound particularly polished, but Phoebe never cared about that. She sang because she loved to, which is something more people should do. Phoebe didn't mind that some people didn't enjoy her voice or music because she did, and that was enough. Music is one of life's greatest joys, and more people should enjoy it freely and without any fear of judgment.
Honesty Goes A Long Way
Almost everyone on Friends told unnecessary lies, including Rachel and Monica. However, Phoebe often chose honesty and had difficulty withholding information from others. She led a private life but never actively hid things from her friends.
Like in the movies, honesty is always the best policy in real life. Nothing good comes from hiding things because the truth always comes out, and it can do so in some very ugly or unflattering ways. Phoebe preferred to save herself the trouble and choose honesty, and more people should follow her advice.
Stand Up For Yourself
Monica and Phoebe are the show's strongest characters. Phoebe, in particular, is self-confident and capable of standing up for herself. Indeed, Phoebe takes no attitude from no one and isn't afraid to cause a scene when necessary.
Some of Phoebe's funniest episodes on Friends center on her strength and unwillingness to compromise, something that's very inspiring for fans. Phoebe is the perfect example that people should never let others humiliate or make them feel bad about themselves. Violence may never be the answer, but a few strong words will go a long way.
Love Has No Schedule
Phoebe has the most uneven and chaotic love life in the show. She spends most of the first nine seasons dating before finding Mike, who eventually becomes her husband. Before him, Phoebe only had one serious relationship, her doomed romance with the Minsk-bound scientist David.
Despite her non-traditional dating life, Phoebe's story is proof that love follows no schedule and can appear when least expected. People shouldn't compare their love lives to others because each person has a unique path to follow before finding true love.
True Friendship Is For Life
One of Phoebe's best quotes on Friends perfectly summarizes the show's essence: "Boyfriends and girlfriends are gonna come and go, but this is for life."
Her statement remains true more than twenty years later. Friends is a show that confirmed the idea that your friends can be your family, and Phoebe was the best and most loyal of the group. She was staunchly independent but always supported her friends whenever they needed her because she knew their bond would be for life. It's a beautiful sentiment that not enough people remember; true friendship needs to be valued and looked after, but it'll be worth it.