Everybody Loves Raymond was a popular sitcom when it aired. The show ran from 1996 to 2005, and audiences thought the over-the-top family dynamics presented in the show were hilarious. While this series still packs a lot of laughs, there are some things about it that might seem a little outdated or ridiculous upon rewatching. The show aired over twenty years ago, so it makes sense some things don’t hold up too well. One character that many fans have pointed out issues with is Raymond himself. He was, in many ways, not a great son, parent, or spouse.
Here is Everybody Loves Raymond: The 10 Worst Things Raymond Has Ever Done.
CONTINUALLY PRESSURED DEBRA FOR SEX
One of the biggest problems with Everybody Loves Raymond overall is how it uses stereotypical sitcom gender roles as comedy. Ray is the bumbling husband while Debra is the capable yet nagging stay-at-home mom. This portrayal isn’t necessarily positive for anyone. One aspect of a stereotypical heterosexual marriage the show portrays is how Debra never wants sex and Raymond always does. This dynamic between them clearly isn't healthy. The way Ray would always pressure Debra for sex was uncomfortable at best.
GETTING JEALOUS OVER HIS FRIEND’S SUCCESS
One of Ray’s main personality flaws is that he gets extremely jealous. For example, even though he’s the favorite child in his family, he often becomes threatened if Robert receives any attention. His need to be the center of attention is also clear when his friend and co-worker Andy gets an article published in Sports Illustrated. While some jealousy in this situation might be natural, it points to a problem Ray has overall.
ACTING INCOMPETENT SO HE WOULDN’T HAVE TO DO HOUSEHOLD CHORES
Many people have pointed out that Everybody Loves Raymond uses harmful stereotypes about marriage and gender. While Ray is a competent person in his job, he seems completely incapable of doing household chores. There are two main reasons for this: Either he really doesn't know how to do them because of outdated gender roles, or, most likely, is he could do them, he just won’t. The fact that he’s so resistant to helping with anything around the house is just annoying.
USING HIS JOB AS AN EXCUSE TO JUST WATCH AND PLAY SPORTS
As a sports writer, it’s understandable that Raymond would need to watch sports at times for his job. However, it’s clear that he uses his job as an excuse to do what he wants to do as a hobby. There are multiple times throughout the series where he uses sports as a reason for not helping with the most basic of house tasks, like watching his own kids. While obviously there would need to be some understanding here, Ray takes this to the extreme.
USING HIS MOM TO DO THINGS FOR HIM
One of the main problems with Ray that is driven home in the show is that his bad behavior is largely because of his mom. While it’s true that Marie did spoil and baby him, he’s also an adult. Ray continually lets Marie do things for him, like clean the house and watch the kids even when he could easily be doing so. Even though he gets annoyed with his mother’s intrusive behavior at times, he’s more than happy to use her so he can skip out of his responsibilities.
PUTTING DEBRA’S FISH IN THE DISHWASHER DURING THANKSGIVING
This is one specific instance that speaks to Raymond’s inattention and lack of caring as a husband. When Debra is trying to host her first Thanksgiving and is clearly stressed about it, he refuses to help her or support her. When she asks him to do the simple task of washing the dishes, he accidentally puts the fish she is preparing into the dishwasher. While this is supposed to be funny, it's really just pathetic.
ALWAYS SPENDING WEEKENDS AWAY GOLFING
While all adults need some time away from their responsibilities to relax, Raymond was always pretty selfish about this. He often wanted to get away on golfing trips for the weekend, but he didn’t really offer to let Debra get away for weekend trips in return. While Ray did have a job, Debra was also busy as a stay-at-home parent and deserved a break, too.
HOW HE SEEMS TO KNOW LITTLE ABOUT DEBRA’S INTERESTS AND PASSIONS
There are many sad stereotypes about marriage in this show. Everybody Loves Raymond makes marriage seem depressing. Ray and Debra barely even seem to like each other. One way Raymond shows his lack of interest in Debra is the fact he never seems to know that much about her. When trying to come up with a personalized gift for her, he has to go to Robert to get ideas about things she would actually like.
USING HIS CHILDHOOD AS AN EXCUSE FOR ALL OF HIS BAD BEHAVIOR
While most adults have issues from their childhood that contribute to bad behavior or habits, part of being an adult is owning up to your problems and working through them. A continual theme of the show is how Ray uses stories from his past to excuse his bad behavior now. He seemingly won’t take any responsibility and work on changing his behavior to be better.
BEING A HANDS-OFF PARENT
While a lot of Ray’s lazy and incompetent behavior is mostly directed at Debra, some of it also extends to his kids. While he might be more involved and caring than Frank was for him, in many ways he’s not that involved of a dad. He leaves almost all of the childcare to Debra and acts like taking care of his kids is babysitting. In many ways, Ray is downright selfish, always putting himself first.