Everyone's favorite period drama Downton Abbey had a slew of arresting characters, but none were quite as polarizing as Lady Mary Talbot, previously Crawley. The chilly protagonist of the show was known for her haunting unkindness to men and her sister Edith, but there were times when her cutting demeanor would roll back to show a soft heart beating with kindness.
Many viewers have debated that the eldest Crawley sister was beyond redemption after all the hatred she had spread, but some have pointed out that her mean disposition was a result of her attempts to protect herself and her weaknesses against the world. Either way, Mary had moments of being loving - and hateful.
Had A Heart: Nursed Matthew After The War
When Mary learned that Matthew had gone off to fight the First World War, she realized what a big mistake she had made by rejecting his proposal, another of her questionable romantic decisions on Downton Abbey. The idea of losing him haunted her, and she prayed for him every day, which was uncharacteristic for cold Mary.
When he returned from war, grievously injured and in a bad shape, Mary tended to him meticulously. She was aware of Lavinia and his engagement to her, but she nursed Matthew back to health without a single ulterior motive, which was big of her.
Heartless: Reacted Coldly To Patrick's Passing
The story of Downton Abbey began with the unfortunate news of the Titanic sinking, taking with it James and Patrick Crawley, the cousin and heir of the Downton Estate. Mary was engaged to Patrick, in order to keep the estate in the family, but she had no grief for the passing of her fiancé.
In fact, Mary was quite relieved to be free of the shackles of the engagement — she could now make her own choice, but she didn't even shed a tear. She merely remarked about how bummed out she was that her wardrobe for the next few months was going to be limited to one of mourning, which definitely stings.
Had A Heart: Prevented Anna's Miscarriage
One of the few people to whom Mary was kind was Anna. She was extremely invested in her maid's life, and always strove to help her out when she or Bates were in trouble. When Anna was unable to have a child, Mary took her to the best gynecologist in London, and paid for her treatment.
On the night that Anna worried she was about to have another miscarriage, Mary made all sorts of arrangements and excuses to take Anna to the doctor. She lied to the Crawleys and to Bates, told everyone that she needed a doctor, and took Anna to York to board a train so she could save her baby. Her effort to protect Anna and her child were heartwarming.
Heartless: Talked Down To Gwen At The Table
The Crawleys' previous maid Gwen quickly rose through the ranks, thanks to the help she received from Sybil. After becoming a secretary, she met Mr. Harding who asked for her hand in marriage. When the Hardings visited Downton, it was a surreal experience for Gwen, and it became a rude one thanks to Barrow and Mary.
The Crawleys didn't remember Gwen, and she didn't know how to tell them, except Barrow "exposed" her past, and Mary piled on, telling the table that Gwen had had plenty of opportunity to say the truth to them. It was quite abhorrent of Mary to be condescending and nasty to a woman who had worked hard to achieve a better life, with the help of Sybil.
Had A Heart: Accepted Tom
It was safe to say that Sybil's love for Tom Branson created a furor in the household, and while Mary was as averse to the marriage as the others, she quickly took the couple's side upon realizing how important it was for Sybil. She supported Tom when he wanted a Catholic christening for their baby, and promised Sybil that she would make an effort to get to know and value Tom, which she definitely did.
After Sybil passed, she became a true sister to him, and they supported each other's endeavors wholeheartedly. She campaigns for him to stay at Downton because he belonged there, and even heard him out about Edna. It was a sign of Mary's big heart that she even rolled about in mud with pigs to help Tom out.
Heartless: Called Matthew A Sea Monster
The entrance of Matthew Crawley into Mary's life was significant, but she truly hated his guts at the start. To her, someone from the city was uncultured, and his upbringing was distateful to her. The first dinner that Isobel and Matthew had with the family was fraught with tension, and Mary contributed most of it.
She very rudely commented on his habits, and then told a Greek myth where she likened herself to a fair maiden who was to be devoured by a sea monster, namely Matthew. To kick him when he was already so out of his comfort zone was quite awful of her.
Had A Heart: Broke Down In Front Of Carson
Sadly, Matthew's passing made Mary a colder person who was even more lost than she was before. Her grief crystallized her, and initially when Carson tried to comfort her, she told him to stay in his place. Soon enough, her unhappiness and guilt got to her, and she ran to Carson to get the affection and care he offered her.
He was a paternal figure to Mary, sometimes more than Robert. She could show her tears and emotions to him, and her breakdown in the moment showed audiences how much she had loved Matthew, and how deep her sorrow was at his death. It was one of the saddest things that had happened to Mary.
Heartless: Told Bertie About Marigold
Perhaps her most despicable acts of betrayal in Downton Abbey, Mary shot down her sister's last chance at marriage, and a good one at that, by being retaliatory and vengeful. After Bertie proposed to Edith, Mary 'let it slip' that Marigold was, in fact, Edith's own daughter out of wedlock, and not just her ward.
Her jealousy at Edith's inflated social rank and happiness made her break off their engagement, and after years of enmity, she destroyed her sister's life on a whim. The cold-hearted, matter-of-fact way she did it made it even worse.
Had A Heart: Brought Bertie And Edith Back Together
To counteract the worst thing that Mary had done to Edith on Downton Abbey, she took the steps to reunite the couple. She may have played a part in breaking the engagement, but Mary proved that she was worthy of redemption when she went out of her way to get Bertie and her sister back together.
She called Bertie secretly, created a set up where Lady Painswick called Edith to London for dinner, and then made them meet at a restaurant so that Bertie could beg for forgiveness and for Edith's hand in marriage, again. For Mary to reverse the devastating consequences of her meanness was unprecedented.
Heartless: Played With Lord Gillingham
Mary was a magnet for male attention, and she not only enjoyed it, but also toyed around with men. Her games with Lord Gillingham were too cruel — she rejected his proposal, then got jealous when he asked Mabel to marry him. The situation was eerily like the one with Matthew.
She then proceeded to woo Gillingham, urging him to break his engagement with Mabel. At her behest, they entered a sexual relationship before marriage, which was frowned upon at the time. He fully intended to marry her after, but when she had her fill, she broke up with him, leaving him in a bad spot with no wife and a bad reputation.