Summary

• A Christmas Story is a beloved holiday classic that captures the nostalgia and charm of being a young child during the holiday season.
• The most memorable quotes from A Christmas Story bring laughter, cozy memories, and holiday spirit to fans even after 40 years.
• The movie showcases relatable childhood moments, such as longing for a special present, schoolyard dares, and the excitement and disappointment of Christmas gifts.

A holiday classic enjoyed by fans every year, the best A Christmas Story quotes highlight how the legacy of the festive movie has lived on. Based on the novel In God We Trust: All Others Pay Cash by Jean Shepherd, A Christmas Story is a nostalgic look at the holiday season through the eyes of young Ralphie, as the older narrator recounts a particularly memorable Christmas with his family in 1940 as he longs for his dream present -- a BB gun. Despite the time period, the movie wonderfully captures the feeling of being a young child at this time of year with a mixture of warm-hearted charm and sharp wit.

Though it was a box office disappointment when it was released in 1983, A Christmas Story has become one of those favorite holiday movies rewatched by countless fans each year during the Christmas season. 2023 will mark a special year for the movie as it is the 40th anniversary of A Christmas Story's release. After so many years, the most memorable A Christmas Story quotes can still provide laughs, cozy memories, and a bit of holiday spirit.

A Christmas Story is available to stream on Max.

25 "I Want An Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action 200-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!"

Ralphie

A Christmas Story begins with the simple yet brilliant concept of young Ralphie deciding on the number one present he wants for Christmas — an official Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air rifle. From that point, the movie becomes a series of attempts for him to persuade his parents to get it for him. He's savvy enough to start with subtle messaging, not wanting to overplay his hand too early. However, his boyish exuberance takes hold just long enough for him to blurt out to his mother what he wants for Christmas. The pained look of regret on his face as soon as he finishes saying it is a hilarious moment from young Peter Billingsley.

24 "You'll Shoot Your Eye Out."

Mother Parker

Ralphie was right to be concerned about his mother's response to his request for a BB gun, as she immediately rejects it as being too dangerous. Though Mother Parker is a caring and kind matriarch for the family, when she dismisses Ralphie, it feels like the final word on the matter. As Adult Ralphie narrates, the claim that he'll shoot his eye is "the classic mother-BB gun block." Of course, "You'll shoot your eye out" becomes an earworm for Ralphie, and he represents every kid whose dreams threaten to be dashed by the cynicism of adulthood.

23 "Flick Says He Saw Some Grizzly Bears Near Pulaski's Candy Store!"

Ralphie

Some of the funniest moments in the movie come from the different ways Ralphie seeks to convince his parents to buy him a BB gun. Sitting down for breakfast, his narration decides the best approach would be a subtle hint at why a BB gun would be useful. Not putting enough thought into it, Ralphie randomly blurts out the improbable lie about bears roaming around town. The way his entire family looks at him "as if I had lobsters crawling out of my ears" is one of the best sight gags in the movie. The fact that even his younger brother Randy can't believe what he heard solidifies Ralphie's miscalculation.

22 "I Triple-Dog-Dare Ya!"

Schwartz

A Christmas Story is a perfect holiday coming-of-age movie filled with these relatable youthful moments. There is something very recognizable in the schoolyard arguments and battles, like daring someone as a way to taunt their unwillingness to do something. The discussion over whether a tongue will stick to a frozen metal pole is taken very seriously as Schwartz and Flick take opposite sides. However, the sudden severity of the situation when the "triple-dog-dare" is introduced makes the scene a classic and the dare becomes the ultimate way to shut someone down or force them to step up.

21 "Schwartz Created A Slight Breach Of Etiquette By Skipping The Triple Dare And Going Right For The Throat!"

Adult Ralphie

As a young child, it's clear that there's a hierarchy when it comes to daring other kids to do things, especially when drastic measures are taken to ensure the dare is followed through with. From the standpoint of someone Ralphie's age, it's almost a forbidden act when someone skips past all the niceties of multiple dares and goes - as he narrates - "straight for the throat." The way these young kids take their made-up rules so seriously, with the narrator still recounting the moment as a controversial one, is a brilliant depiction of those small childhood moments that feel much bigger.

20 "Adults Loved To Say Things Like That But Kids Knew Better. We Knew Darn Well It Was Always Better Not To Get Caught."

Adult Ralphie

While many of the best A Christmas Story quotes deal with the wild imaginations and strange perceptions within a child's mind, the narration also provides moments when the children actually seem more reasonable than the adults. After Flick gets his tongue stuck to the flag pole, Ralphie's teacher Mrs. Shields addresses the class, hoping those who put Flick up to it will come forward. When no one volunteers, she reminds them the guilt they feel will be a far worse punishment. The look on Ralphie's face is not of guilt but total relief, as Adult Ralphie's narration confirms children are smarter than that and happy to avoid getting caught.

19 "I Can't Put My Arms Down."

Randy

Ralphie's younger brother Randy is at a threshold: still at an age where he reaps the benefits of his mother's coddling but feels the effects of her smothering. Randy and Ralphie's mom's attempt to protect her son from the slightest effects of an Indiana winner is both laughable and endearing. Randy rarely speaks without whining, but it's hard not to feel bad for him as he is stuffed into an over-the-top snowsuit that gives him little to no mobility.

18 "Only One Thing In The World Could've Dragged Me Away From The Soft Glow Of Electric Sex Gleaming In The Window."

Adult Ralphie

The leg lamp is an iconic movie prop cemented by the importance it holds in A Christmas Story. Old Man Parker's prize is the fishnet-encased lamp that becomes a source of great tension in the household. Mother Parker is repulsed, but the lamp awakens urges in young Ralphie as his adult self hilariously remembers. While his mother is horrified by Ralphie's urge to touch the leg, it is innocent as Ralphie does it almost absent-mindedly while also being distracted from it by the promise of his Little Orphan Annie radio program. It is a hilarious Ralphie moment that plays on his being at the cusp of adolescence.

17 "Meatloaf, Smeatloaf, Double Beetloaf. I Hate Meatloaf."

Randy

Randy is less relatable as an actual character than what he represents — the ever-present, mostly annoying, and sometimes entertaining younger sibling. He doesn't have much to contribute to a conversation, but, when he does, it can resonate. Meatloaf is a middle-class dinner of choice, but it can be less appealing to those children that have to eat it over and over. Randy fills the role of the typical picky eater at the dinner table, throwing his food around instead of actually eating it. However, it leads to the charming moment of his mother appealing to his playful side and getting him to act like a pig as he sloppily eats up the plateful of food.

16 "He Looks Like A Deranged Easter Bunny."

The Old Man

While Ralphie excitedly wakes on Christmas morning to find out if he got his dream present, he also has to contend with the less thrilling presents that are under the tree for him. Old Man Parker's assessment of Ralphie's costume from his Aunt Clara, "He looks like a deranged Easter Bunny," is a reminder of such gifts. Ralphie's utter humiliation at having to parade around in a pink bunny costume, becoming the ridicule of his father, is a relatable torment. There are also gifts every year that miss the mark. Ralphie's just happens to be particularly over-the-top terrible.

15 "How About A Nice Football?"

Santa Claus

When Ralphie's attempts to convince the other adults in his life to get him the BB gun fail, he sees the only option left is Santa. Unfortunately for Ralphie, he chooses to make his wish to a mall Santa who doesn't seem to take pride in his job. While not quite as bad as the various Christmas horror movie Santa Claus villains, he is an intimidating figure who scares Ralphie speechless.

When Ralphie cannot voice what he wants for Christmas, Santa makes the rather dull choice of a football for him. As beloved as a figure as Santa is, visits to mall Santas are often associated with scared children and this idea is highlighted by Ralphie being too terrified to even remember his most coveted present request.

14 "My Mother Must Have Gotten To Miss Shields."

Adult Ralphie

The various schemes Ralphie comes up with to ensure he gets his BB gun extend even to his classroom. After getting an assignment from his teacher, Miss Shields, Ralphie sees it as an opportunity to eloquently state his case, hoping an A+ essay will convince his mother to let him have the present. Not only does Miss Shields give him a lackluster grade on the paper, but she also remarks "You'll shoot your eye out!" Ralphie sees this as a giant conspiracy with his teacher and mother working together to deny him his BB gun and accepts no other explanation.

13 "Only I Didn't Say 'Fudge.'"

Adult Ralphie

A Christmas Story may be set during a more innocent time and in a more idyllic place, but Ralphie still finds opportunities to get in trouble, such as the moment he accidentally curses in front of his father. While helping The Old Man change a tire, Ralphie loses the bolts, leading to his slow-motion release of "Fudge," with the Adult Ralphie explaining that wasn't the real word he used. Ralph realizes just a split-second too late that he's sealed his fate, with an expression of terror on his face that speaks to the trouble he knows he is in.

12 "You Used Up All The Glue On Purpose!"

The Old Man

The infamous leg lamp becomes the source of considerable tension in the house, with The Old Man proudly displaying it and Mother Parker hating it. When the lamp breaks as Mother Parker is dusting, The Old Man immediately starts making accusations. Determined to mend the lamp, Mother Parker informs The Old Man that there is no more glue. His enraged reaction and ridiculous claim of her planning this all along show that he can be just as immature as his children.

11 "Naddafinga!"

The Old Man

When his precious lamp is "accidentally" broken by Mother Parker, The Old Man's reaction is a hilarious mix of anguish and anger. Unwilling and unable to let the lamp go, The Old Man does his best to salvage what's left, but fate is working against him. Convinced this entire situation is a conspiracy, he rushes out to get supplies. Leaving in a huff and trying to get the definitive last word, all he can manage is the confusing "Naddafinga!" The Old Man is a reminder of stern and intimidating father figures, but this is a vulnerable moment that makes him laughable as well.

10 "Aaah! 'Fra-GEE-Lay!' It Must Be Italian!"

The Old Man

When The Old Man finally wins a contest, he's convinced the prize must be big. When the crate arrives, the writing on the outside reads "Fragile." The excitement he feels causes his mind to get away from him as he reads it as some exotic word and assumes the prize must be from Italy. The quote is one of the most famous from the movie and The Old Man's pronunciation of the word "fragile" has worked its way into the public consciousness. While The Old Man certainly gets carried away with the lamp, the pure anticipation on his face is charmingly reminiscent of young children on Christmas morning.

9 "It Could Be A Bowling Alley!"

The Old Man

The Old Man is a fairly level-headed character for most of the movie, but winning the mysterious prize extends his ego in such a way that he temporarily loses all sense of logic. Before the massive crate arrives, he excitedly imagines all the amazing things he could get for his reward, again showing his childlike joy. However, his insistence that he might be awarded an entire bowling alley is such an outrageous and random idea that it makes the reveal of the lamp even funnier.

8 "He Had Yellow Eyes! So Help Me God! Yellow Eyes!"

Adult Ralphie

Another one of the relatable childhood aspects portrayed in A Christmas Story is dealing with the meanspirited school bully. Scut Farkus cements himself as one of the most memorable young tormentors in movie history with his intimidating laugh and his coon-skin cap. As another example of how a child's mind can exaggerate things from their youth, Adult Ralphie looks back on Scut, still with terror, as he remains convinced the bully had yellow eyes. However, the cruelty Scut forces on Ralphie and his friends makes Ralphie's later revenge all the sweeter.

7 "Oh My God, I Shot My Eye Out!"

Adult Ralphie

Some viewers see A Christmas Story as one of those great plotless movies that still works. Indeed, there is not much of a story to go on, but the overall mission of Ralphie wanting to get his BB gun does have a humorous conclusion. After the surprise reveal of the gun, Ralphie runs outside with his new treasured possession and fires his first shot which ricochets into his glasses. His moment of horrified realization that all the adults warning him were right is a hilarious lesson. After such a build-up, the movie finds a clever way of subverting expectations with this result.

6 "In The Heat Of Battle, My Father Wove A Tapestry Of Obscenity, That As Far As We Know Is Still Hanging In Space Over Lake Michigan."

Adult Ralphie

One of the greatest strengths of A Christmas Story is the narration by author Jean Shepherd himself. As his writings inspired the story, he is the best option to deliver the inventive, witty, and brilliant prose. The way Adult Ralphie looks back on these moments of his youth with such reverence while using his skills as a wordsmith makes many of the best A Christmas Story quotes. The way Ralphie explains The Old Man's tirade of swearing at the malfunctioning furnace from an innocent, child-like point of view paints an oddly beautiful picture of the vulgar moment.