As one of the two main protagonists of Big Mouth, Andrew's life is unsurprisingly a disaster — at least by teenage standards. He is one of the first characters to face the pains of puberty, and it's hard for him when all the hormones surge into his body at the same time, making him simultaneously pimpled, oily, and worst of all, perennially aroused, seemingly beyond control.
Maury doesn't help as much as hinder Andrew's social standing at school, or even his life at home, but the boy trudges onwards regardless of what fate has in store for him. But Andrew is a child, after all, so a lot of what he goes through can be too much of a burden for someone his age.
His Father's Treatment
Andrew is given the short end of the social stick, and this is entirely his father's fault. Marty Glouberman shames his son whenever given the chance; he assumes that he's responsible for anything bad that happens, even going so far as to punishing him for things outside of his control.
In one horrifying instance, the father literally tears his son's upper lip to shreds because he can't tolerate the site of the pubescent boy's growing mustache. How Andrew doesn't lash out at this is a mystery, indeed.
The Cat Clock Conundrum
At Nick's house for a sleepover, Andrew imagines that his best friend's cat clock is actually Marty's attractive secretary, and this allows him to achieve orgasm.
Keeping aside how mortifying it would have been if his pal had accidentally woken up and caught him in the middle of going at it, the notion that Andrew is unable to perceive this clear boundary is pretty sad. He finishes his task, but at what cost?
The Stuck Hat
Andrew tries to pretend that his new hat is just a fashion trend he's trying to bring back, which is honestly believable for him, except that this time it's superglued onto his scalp.
Lola furiously rips it off his head when he refuses to do so himself, leading to some serious damage and severe hair loss. Sadly, the end result is most unsatisfying for Andrew, as his hair is torn out in random pieces, making him look like a badly mowed dome-shaped hedge. If only he had just told the truth at the start.
He Gets Caught Sexting His Cousin
Andrew is the best at humiliating himself in any given situation — it's gotten so frequent that it's hard to keep track, let alone rank. Suffice it to say that they are mostly hilarious from the audience's perspective.
Nevertheless, one of the most agonizing examples is the time his parents saw his naked pictures on their home screens, mainly because he had forgotten to un-sync his phone from the family connection. What's worse is that the intended recipient of these badly-taken shots of his genitalia is his first cousin who lives in Florida.
Embarrasses Himself In Front Of His Extended Family
Not only does Andrew embarrass his parents after getting caught making out with Cheryl, but he takes it several steps higher when he meets his uncle and his daughter the second time. At his Zaide's funeral, he tries his hardest not to give in to temptation once again, but ultimately he foolishly decides to "relieve his stress."
Andrew actually masturbates in the same room in which his grandfather's coffin has been placed, and has the gall to use his pocket square to clean himself up. It only gets worse from there.
What He Does In His Best Friend's Pool House
Andrew, like many straight teenage male characters on TV and in movies, has an unhealthy obsession with Nick's sister, Leah. While at the Birch's pool, he chooses to go down an unfortunate path when he (once again) starts masturbating while rubbing her wet bikini all over his face.
As expected, Andrew is caught by none other than Leah herself, but it is only thanks to her generosity that Nick's parents remain in the dark about what the events transpiring in their pool house.
"Breaks Up" With Nick
The two boys fight a lot, but most of their quarrels are based on some silly argument or another. At the end of the third season, Andrew firmly avows that their friendship has been permanently terminated.
First of all, the kid has no other friends, having alienated everyone else (mostly Missy) due to his erratic and downright cruel attitude. Does he have to cut off ties with the only person who cares about him? It requires a couple of episodes and a few camp nightmares, but they finally end up together again.
Refuses To Acknowledge His Queerness
Andrew isn't gay, that's for sure, but he might not be straight, either. The first instance of this is when he reveals his fears that he's potentially into men, which is "resolved" when Nick kisses him. But then Andrew drops a lot of hints to the contrary, such as in commenting with great gusto about the attractive men around him.
For example, in front of Michael Angelo, Jessi's latest romantic entanglement, Andrew preens and gushes, constantly stating the nature of the older boy's beauty and offering his "services" in all sorts of ways. Andrew explores so much about his sexuality with Maury, but it's unfortunate that the storyline of his sexual identity was just dropped.
Camp Constipation
At camp, Andrew's toilet schedule is interrupted, forcing his poop to stay inside his body for approximately four weeks. He is unable to pass it anymore, moaning in pain whenever he attempts to do so — and the sassiness offered by the anthropomorphic feces doesn't help.
It takes a long time, enormous struggle, the presence of Nick, and a possibly damaged lower intestine, before the poop is born. Andrew's relief isn't long lasting, though, as the whole camp finds out what had happened almost immediately.
How He Treats Missy
Since Andrew cannot handle the fact that his girlfriend dumps him, he takes his rage out on her for no rhyme nor reason. If that's not enough, he even threatens her new friend, Lars, the only boy in the school with a physical disability.
It gets worse: Andrew accuses Lars of "stealing his woman" and threatens to expose him (against Maury's stern advice, if it can be believed). He throws the poor kid out of his wheelchair, which turns out exactly as one would assume in such a scenario.