When Raj met Anu in the final season of The Big Bang Theory, fans felt like he was finally going to settle down and get the happy ending he always dreamed of. But, alas, it wasn't meant to be. Before the finale, Raj and Anu's relationship was over just as quickly as it had begun and he was right back where he started in the pilot — alone and single.
In some ways, fans saw this coming from the minute the two met. Although Raj — and some fans — really wanted it to work out with Anu, there were things that showed they were doomed to fail from the start. Her late introduction into the show certainly played a significant role in their downfall.
Differing Relationship Priorities
It was a well-known fact that Raj loved love. One of his greatest wishes was to find a partner with the same appreciation of romance and all the hearts and flowers that go with it. This was one of the reasons why he avoided arranged matches for a long time. But in season 12, he told his father that he was tired of being single and asked him to arrange a match - hence the courtship with Anu.
And while he'd agreed to an arranged match, Raj still held out hope that he and Anu would get to know each other beyond marriage questionnaires, fall in love and experience the romance he always wanted. But once he met her, he realized their priorities when it came to romance were different. In a discussion about their pending nuptials, Raj thought they'd discuss themes and flowers, whereas Anu wanted to discuss personal finances, taxes, and joint accounts, which all sounded too clinical for him.
Started With A Lie
Before Raj met Anu, they both answered a marriage questionnaire to see if they were compatible. He announced his upcoming wedding to his friends and they all expressed their surprise at the suddenness of his decision. When they questioned him further about it, he said as long as he lasted six to 10 dates without revealing his true self, the wedding would happen.
Hiding the truth about his character was a lie bound to unravel during the course of their relationship, and if he was so worried that it would affect his relationship to the point of calling off the wedding, that was a clear indication that maybe it shouldn't happen at all because it would mean pretending to be someone he's not for the rest of his life.
His Insecurity
By the 12th season, Raj had come a long way from the man he was in the pilot with regards to his interactions with women. His former relationships may have had something to do with this, as he gained more experience with different women. Despite this, he was still nervous around women, as evidenced by his insecurity around Anu.
During their first date, she told him that while the sweet, insecure act was cute, it didn't really assure her of his seriousness with regards to their relationship and possible marriage. Considering that was a big part of Raj's character, her being put off by it from the start showed the relationship wouldn't fare well down the line.
They Were Different People
Raj and Anu were a great match on paper, but the reality was a little different. In his own words, Raj was a hopeless romantic, and Anu was more practical when it came to love. In "The Tam Turbulence," she told Penny and Bernadette that she was settling for an arranged match because she'd tried the love thing before and it hadn't really worked out.
Anu's practical approach to love extended into her personal life, creating quite a contrast between her and Raj. For example, she didn't like music, yet he could quote the lyrics of his favorite songs. Those differences, while seemingly insignificant, usually add up and negatively affect a relationship, and in this case, they did.
Trust Issues
Raj didn't trust that Anu would like the real him if she got to know him, so he hid some things about himself and freaked out when Penny and Bernadette got drunk and told Anu he wore ladies' deodorant, among other things. Anu didn't trust Raj either, so when Penny and Bernadette offered to take her out to get to know her, she plied them with wine so they'd spill secrets about him.
A little further in the relationship, Anu found out Raj was spying on her through her doorbell camera. He saw a man visiting her and it turned out to be her ex coming to collect his things. He flipped out and accused her of cheating and she lashed back at him for invading her privacy and not trusting her. That was the moment they realized they didn't know anything about each other.
She Intimidated Him
From the first date and going forward, Raj seemed nervous around Anu, especially after she called the waiter and made some intense demands with regards to their water and cutlery. While she came off as intimidating to Raj — to the point that he called her "ma'am" — it was simply indicative of her career as a concierge.
Considering this, it's no surprise that Raj got so nervous about their first time having sex in "The Consummation Deviation" that his selective mutism came back — at least for a little while. Although the night started out rocky, it led to them being open and honest with each other for the first time.
Her Career
Anu was a concierge and a very good one from the looks of it. She was also very ambitious, as she told Raj she was planning to take over a managerial position in five years during their first date (four if she could get the current manager out of the way). This was a clear indication of how dedicated she was to her job and how important it was to her.
In light of this, it's no surprise that when she was offered a managerial position in London, she took it without hesitation or consideration of what it meant for her relationship with Raj. Ultimately, her career change was a catalyst for the end of their relationship.
It Was A Rushed Relationship
Raj and Anu planned to get married three months after they first met. It felt a little rushed, since they didn't know much about each other at the time, and going into a marriage as familiar strangers might not have been a great idea. They realized this in episode 11, "The Paintball Scattering," when they broke up then decided to get back together, but date for a while to get to know each other first.
Things seemed to be going great and at a good pace until Anu took a job in London then Raj decided to go and propose immediately. It would have been wiser to date long-distance first and see if they could make things work before uprooting his life.
They Were Both In It For The Wrong Reasons
As Anu pointed out, Raj only wanted to get married because all his friends were married and he was lonely and didn't want to feel left out.
As a counterargument, Raj also pointed out that Anu was worried she wasted many years dating the wrong people and she was looking for a shortcut to getting kids and building a family. None of those reasons was a good foundation for a long, successful marriage.
His Dating History
The pursuit for a happily-ever-after led Raj into several relationships over the 12-season run of The Big Bang Theory. While he did learn to communicate with women better from his former relationships, he completely disregarded all the lessons he'd learned when he started a relationship with Anu.
Instead of being open and honest, he lied and pretended to be someone different, at first. He also neglected the importance of considering what he truly wanted in a lifelong partner until the end, when Howard reminded him and stopped him from going after Anu out of fear of being alone.