The DCEU feature film Aquaman is finally upon us and the box office is buzzing. This adaptation of the character has come a long way form its comic book origins. For one thing, Game of Thrones alumnus Jason Mamoa isn't some generic blond hunk. This is a rough and ready version of Arthur Curry coming up from the depths of the ocean and he made a splash in Justice League.
In the many decades since the first comics book appearance of our fishy superhero, the character hasn't always shone. There have long been some things fundamentally wrong with Aquaman, who he is, and how he lives, that many fans overlook in order to enjoy the character.
Aquaman was originally created in the Golden Age, when comics were aimed at young children and creators didn’t always think things through. As comics got more sophisticated over the years, attempts were made to make him more “serious” – often to poor effect. There were adjustments in attitudes, strange sidekicks, and some serious wardrobe misfires that most of us would rather just look away from, lest we find our regal hero a little tarnished. The time to open our eyes has come: there’s a whole lot about the King of the Sea that simply does not add up. With Aquaman roaring into theaters, this hero deserves a second look. Ready to take a dip into the uncharted waters of flawed fandom?
Here are 20 Things Wrong With Aquaman (The Character) We All Choose To Ignore.
Human and Atlantean DNA Should Not Produce Offspring
In basic biology, different species just cannot produce offspring. It’s a DNA thing. Cats can't make kitty-puppies with dogs-- although that would be super cute, and Vulcans from the other side of the galaxy shouldn't be able to make pointed-eared babies with humans. Underwater breathers from Atlantis would almost certainly be at enough of a genetic variance with us lung-blowing land-dwellers to create a viable child.
Arthur Curry is supposedly just such a miraculous product of incompatible lineage, according to his original origin story in the comics and the film. You’d have more luck finding a tear in the ocean.
He Fights for Justice and Democracy, but He’s a King
When Aquaman first appeared during the WWII years, superheroes like him were born in the spirit of America and the Allies committing the forces of democracy to stop the scourge of fascism. This noble impulse was behind the creation of other contemporary metahumans, most notably Captain America.
The thing is – Arthur Curry is a king. As the sovereign regent of Atlantis, nobody elected him as leader and nobody is allowed to counter his word. The only threat to his rule would by popular revolt or forcible usurping by a rival or enemy. This guy is suppose to be fighting the good fight for justice when kings do the exact opposite!
He Should Be an Enemy of Humanity, not an Ally
In some storylines, he is indeed an adversary against us surface dwellers, but for the most part, Aquaman is 100% an ally to humanity. He was even a founding member of the Justice League.
The truth of the matter is that Atlantis and all of the oceans have been little more than a giant dumping ground for humanity all through the modern age. Toxic waste, agricultural runoff, nuclear materials, and just plain old industrial-scale garbage has been disposed of right into the oceans, polluting things so badly that there are garbage patches the size of Texas swimming around out there. By all rights, Arthur Curry should be making war on us lousy humans.
Yes, He’s Still Kind of Silly as a Superhero
It’s become something of a cliché in the comics world, but still, it must be acknowledged. Aquaman is kind of a silly hero-- but that's okay! Not all superheroes need to be perfectly serious. In fact, many of his contemporaries started out being the stuff of simplistic children’s stories, but characters like Superman and Batman had more ways to adapt into “growing up” with audiences.
Aquaman talks to fish. He swims around in the water. Outside the water, he gets weak. He plays with dolphins and dukes it out with giant squids. It’s really hard to take him seriously, unlike Kal-El and Bruce Wayne, whose orphan stories are a bit more relatable and whose surface-level adventures are more recognizable.
His Strength Keeps Changing
How tough is Arthur Curry, anyway? In some early stories, a mere shark could threaten him. In other stories, he literally punches out whales! It seems that in the water, he can do everything from swim up the Niagara Falls to ram into ships with the power of a torpedo. On the other hand, he’s faced “normal” humans and gotten beaten back.
Once out of the water, however, he’s supposed to get very weak and even be in danger of losing his life within hours, but many adventures feature him spending far more time on land without losing potency. We can all agree he’s got super-strength – most of the time-- but over the years, the extent of that has varied greatly, and remains poorly defined.
His Amphibious Breathing
Back to the DNA argument, let’s think for a minute about what the mixing of humanoid pedigrees is supposed to have produced in the case of Arthur Curry. On his mother’s Atlantean side, he presumably has gills, the necessary biological apparatus required for extracting oxygen from fluid water. Meanwhile, his father Thomas Curry is 100% human, using lungs to suck O2 out of a gaseous atmosphere.
In some retconned version of Atlantean biology, the species is supposed to have a recessive ability for air breathing, in some cases temporarily. That’s not the case in all versions of his origin story, however. Splicing a fish with a monkey doesn't produce a capability for underwater/air breathing.
Where Did His Fish Telepathy Come From?
As we have already said, talking to fish is a pretty silly superpower. In the 1940s, however, it was a lot cooler-- mostly because the great era of underwater exploration hadn’t started yet. There was no Discovery Channel, no Shark Week, and no cameras recording life under the waves. The ocean was still a place of mystery where anything was possible. Eventually, though, we learned better.
This leaves us unable to adequately explain Aquaman’s ability to communicate telepathically with sea creatures. It’s even weirder when you consider that isn't just fish: marine mammals, crustaceans, octopi – he chitchats with them all, but none of his fellow Atlanteans do. Yes, there’s been some retconning to explain the power, but it never really feels properly resolved.
Both Salt and Fresh Water Seem to Nourish Him
In the natural world, virtually all creatures who breathe underwater require either salt water environments or fresh water bodies in order to survive. Of course, there are some specialized exceptions: salmon, for example, can switch off from river systems to the sea. There are also some species of shark who can travel through estuaries up into less saline areas. So it seems to be with Atlanteans.
This might make sense if there was a culture of this behavior established. Salmon evolved this ability in order to spawn safely. Freshwater sharks require returns to the sea and cannot exclusively exist in rivers or lakes. In the history of Aquaman, there’s never been any display of biological functionality for this trait, and as such, is truly unlikely from a scientific point of view.
He’s Stronger than Most Atlanteans
Here's another problem inherent in the unlikely hybrid of Atlantean and human DNA. It is established that the undersea humanoids are, by virtue of their genetics, much stronger than homo sapiens-- but Arthur Curry is a lot stronger than most of his Atlantean brethren. If anything, he should be weaker than his loyal subjects because of that human DNA in the mix.
We could even understand it if somehow he was just as strong as the average Atlantean, but even more powerful? This would require a mutation that would beat so many odds. The creators are just selling us a fish story!
When He Got Boring, They Made Him Magic
Ge can breath underwater, talk to fish, fight with varied strength, and is a king, so why is Aquaman still viewed as so boring? One possible explanation is that the character could not be adapted easily as pop culture evolved.
There have been other DC heroes from back in the day who faced similar issues. Both Shazam! and Plastic Man come to mind. Not only were they goofy, but their appeal was tied in0to comedy. With Aquaman, creators tried all sorts of ways to update him. Currently, he has magic powers. Not only that, his trident has extra superpowers that stem from magic. It’s been engaging enough to audiences that those attributes have been added to the film version.
Most Sea Creatures Aren’t Smart Enough to Follow His Commands
Have you ever tried to train a dog? They are pretty smart, which is why it can be done. Now, try training a fish. Their mental capacities are far lower. How in the world can Aquaman communicate with them? It’s not enough to have the power of telepathy. The receiving creature must have the capacity to process those mental commands. This is perfectly believable when it comes to highly intelligent species like dolphins and whales, but not so much when it comes to guppies, sharks, and sea horses.
We are meant to believe that these beings with no language can interpret complex instructions from a humanoid brain. That’s about as tough to swallow as a goldfish!
His Hook Hand
In the 1990s, another attempt was made to turn Aquaman into a "cooler" character. The silly swimmer was given long flowing hair and grew a beard, but adding that grunge look wasn’t enough. DC created a story where poor Arthur lost his left hand to a villain. What was it replaced with? Why, a flying hook, of course!
Atlantean tech is advanced. Why not give him a Star Wars-style fully functional prosthetic hand instead? Unless the writers were going for a Pirates of the Caribbean vibe, this really makes no sense. Oh, and, yeah – eventually he got a far more practical fake hand anyway.
He Married Wonder Woman
A lot of things can go wrong when you go back to the past and alter the timeline. Just ask the Flash, who in the 2011 Flashpoint crossover event in the comics, did just that. In order to save his mother, he used the Speed Force to travel back in time and prevent that from happening. In so doing, he remixed all of human history until it was almost unrecognizable.
Part of that history had Atlantis and Themyscira crate an alliance via a marriage of convenience between Aquaman and Wonder Woman. While the plot point was fun to watch, it really could have gone in a more believable direction.
He needed to be in water every hour
Back in the Silver Age, when superheroes were supposedly growing up from kids’ stuff, writers tried to add a vulnerability to Aquaman so he could be more prone to danger. It was pretty much a version of Superman’s kryptonite or how Green Lantern needs to recharge his ring every 24 hours. They took a look at the guy and probably said – "hey, he’s basically a fish. Let's give him a fish's weakness."
Aquaman began to get weak and dehydrated when he was out of water for more than an hour. This makes no sense-- he can breathe air, right? His biology made even less sense as a result.
His Rogues' Gallery
When it comes to rogues' galleries, Superman has the ingenious Lex Luthor, the almost invincible Brainiac, Metallo, and so on. Batman has The Joker, Penguin, Bane, and so many more iconic foes. Aquaman has Ocean Master and Black Manta, but from there, it doesn’t look so good.
The Fisherman uses a super rod-and-reel to battle the king of the sea. Quisp is a “water sprite” who shares its name with a cereal. How tough does The Scavenger sound? He has one of those old-school diving suits and can slow down time a little. Are you still awake out there? We don’t blame you-- these bad guys sleep with the fishes!
His failed TV show
There are a lot of folks who are very happy to finally see a decent live-action version of Aquaman. The Jason Momoa vehicle delivers battles, laughs, and amazing CGI vistas. Did you know that there was a totally awful TV pilot made of Aquaman back in the 2000s?
The story focused on a buff blond Florida beach brat named “A.C.” who has a secret past. Included in his origin story was a connection to the Bermuda Triangle and a magic necklace. Some fans seemed to like it, but looking back, the show would likely have been pretty silly had it gone to series. Oddly, the reason it never got picked up was because of a network merger that spawned the CW – which now features hit DC shows like Supergirl and Arrow. Maybe A.C. will come back in the next crossover event.
The Entourage Aquaman
For fans of Entourage, the gang of Vincent Chase, his brother Johnny “Drama,” Turtle, E, and Ari Gold offered an unforgettably hilarious look at the lives of Hollywood stars and the people around them. Some may forget that on the show, Vincent starred in a feature film version of Aquaman where he played the title role, as directed by James Cameron.
That’s because, back in those days, nobody thought Aquaman would ever really have a hit movie, so it was kind of an inside joke that this would be the film to propel Vincent in super-stardom. My, how times have now changed!
He Was Best Friends with an Octopus
Here’s another wacky Golden Age holdover. Back in the 1940s and '50s, attitudes towards child labor and endangerment were a little different than they are now. Think about all those sidekicks. These days, Batman would not be allowed to take young Robin along to face villains. Same goes for Green Arrow taking on Speedy, and so many more. Aquaman didn’t just have Aqualad as a sidekick – he also had Topo the octopus.
Of course, this octopus can play music and shoot a bow and arrow. He’s a really smart octopus! Rather than leaving this relic of the past in the past, Topo has been rebooted a bunch of times, and is now a giant sea monster in the comics. He even appears in the live-action movie.
His '80s Costume Redesign
Many superheroes face the tailor’s scissors sooner or later. Characters like Superman and Batman have had dozens of subtle alterations over the decades. In yet another attempt to make Aquaman “cool,” a head-to-toe redesign of his classic outfit debuted for the "Thicker Than Water" storyline in the '80s.
It was one ugly suit. He looked like a member of Seaworld’s water ski team, or maybe a diver who was trying to be camouflaged at the bottom of a swimming pool. It didn’t last long, but it was one of the worst-received costume redesigns and rightfully so! His armor in the film is an undeniable upgrade.
He's the wrong shape
The human body is just not aquadynamic. Just take a look at the fastest creatures in the sea: the contouring of a shark, for example, is so perfectly shaped to cut through a medium with minimum resistance that airplane designs are based on their specifications. There’s a reason that no super-fast seaworthy animal has arms and legs and torsos cut for walking rather than swimming.
The idea that a guy shaped like Aquaman – or any Atlantean for that matter – could somehow doggy paddle as fast as a speedboat has always been farfetched. Yes, it’s all just fantasy, but there are so many other things already wrong with Aquaman, that we may as well just throw this one on the fire for good measure!
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