Aggretsuko is highly relatable for any mid-20 something year old in the workforce. Complete with helicopter parents, a lackluster work environment, and death metal rage, we can all draw parallels to our own lives. So, we’re going to extend that into a game you definitely have played with your friends at least once.v Here are the Aggretsuko characters sorted into their Hogwarts houses.
16 Manumaru - Hufflepuff
Though he doesn’t get much screen time, you can’t help but like this guy. Also, he’s fuzzy and adorable. While at the work mixer, he seems to befriend Fenneko and gets her to open up in a way we hadn’t seen before.
It looks like he’s easy to get along with and definitely a loyal friend to Resasuke. He hardcore wingmans for him, going as far as to text and call Resasuke to give him dating advice.
15 Tsubone - Slytherin
Sorry, Slytherin, you’re going to get a bit of a bad rep on this one. Tsubone is just super underhanded while also trying to get herself ahead. She constantly kisses up to the male co-workers but talks down to all of the female ones. Thing is, she’s not particularly brave, smart, or loyal. So, Slytherin it is?
14 Komiya - Slytherin
Komiya falls into a Crabbe and Goyle role to compliment Ton’s Malfoy. Truly, next to Anai, he has to be the most annoying of the office gang. His entire character is just encouraging Ton’s bad behaviors and doing hella brown-nosing. Just...get out of here, dude. What do you do?
13 Retsuko’s Mom - Hufflepuff
This. This is every daughter’s mother. Pushy, a helicopter parent, and overbearing at best, it’s clear to see why Retsuko lives on her own at 25. But, ultimately, Retsuko’s mom means well, and, though they have a strained relationship, it’s clear Retsuko cares about her mother, too, and tries to consider her advice.
Maybe Hufflepuff isn’t the best house to place her in. The second best would probably be Gryffindor, considering she married for love in an age of arranged marriages.
12 Puko - Gryffindor
The free spirit of the cast, Puko is an explorer by nature. She constantly travels the globe, soul searching all the while. She doesn’t let anything hold her back, though she never seems to have solid goals or aspirations. Still, you have to be brave to up and leave everything you know, especially when faced with the reality of life.
11 Resasuke - Ravenclaw
At first glance, he seems downright unsortable. There’s literally nothing to work with, which was the entire point of his character since it allowed Retsuko to project her desires onto him for a short while.
As a space cadet, a member of the sales team, and seemingly lacking big aspirations, we’ll tentatively say Ravenclaw. He’s gotta have some brains to pull off being in sales for as long as Retsuko’s been in accounting. Also, Luna Lovegood. You can be a space cadet and still be in Ravenclaw.
10 Tsunoda - Slytherin
Sensing a pattern yet? Tsunoda’s hard to place because it’s unclear which of her strengths play out more: her cunning and deceit or her brains. Keeping herself so upbeat and carefree not only annoys her co-workers, but it makes them underestimate her. She keeps herself ahead by kissing some major ass, giving her some serious job security.
9 Kabae - Hufflepuff
Kabae turned into the Ultimate Mom in Season 2, and not only did it make her a lot more likeable, but added some character depth. A gossiper at heart, she’s actually pretty selective in the information she shares. Retsuko believed she spilled about her wanting to quit, but Kabae responds that it wasn’t her, and she’d never spread that kind of gossip because it would threaten Retsuko’s position. That’s a big Hufflepuff move.
8 Anai - Slytherin
Anai, you hot mess. As the youngest and newest in the office, Anai knows his position. He’s two-faced, putting on some cheery attitude in person and then bullying the workers with more seniority via written text. That’s a classic power play. Having something on the record is leverage, which makes Anai a Slytherin. He’ll literally do anything to get ahead. It’s not until Kabae shows him kindness that he starts acting less like a jerk and more like a person.
7 Director Ton - Slytherin
What else was he going to be? It seems like his ambition’s taken a backseat, but he had some good moments in Season 1 that alluded to his earlier attitude. While drunk at the office outing, he admitted to Retsuko that he pushes her so hard because he knows she can take it and has potential to rise in the company, same as his old boss did for him. And he’s not a total jerk; he’s pretty affectionate towards his family.
6 Tadano - Ravenclaw
Tadano’s got some big ambitions but doesn’t push himself in every aspect of life as we can see from the driving classes. He’s not a slacker, but he only applies himself in certain situations. But, given his intelligence and success, he really doesn’t have to work anymore.
He chooses to in order to enhance other people’s lives. He’s got some controversial viewpoints, but he always has an intelligent, thought-out answer to back them up.
5 Director Gori - Gryffindor
Ok, so there’s gotta be at least one Gryffindor on this list, and Gori kind of fits the bill. Here’s the argument: she’s emotionally brave. She comes off as confident and most likely took some risks to get into her current position of Marketing Director.
She knows her stuff, she works her butt off, and, despite valuing her career, still tries to make time for love. She puts herself out there, even after all the failure and rejection she’s faced on the romantic front. That’s bravery.
4 Ms. Washimi - Ravenclaw
Washimi is a boss. Cool, calm, collected, and definitely the alpha of the gang, she’s scarily practical and often the voice of reason. It’s a toss-up for her between Slytherin and Ravenclaw. She’s a problem solver and immensely clever, but also equally as ambitious.
The deciding factor here is that she’s tried the dating scene and found that she will quickly become bored with whatever company she chooses. Most likely, the men she’s met haven’t been mentally stimulating or challenging to her. Thus, a Ravenclaw.
3 Haida - Hufflepuff
Bursts of anger are just a part of life, so that’s not necessarily a deciding factor. He has a big heart and is fiercely loyal to his friends. What’s most telling is that despite having a crush on Retsuko and feeling jealousy towards the men who date her, he ultimately respects her decisions and just wants her to be happy. That is a massive Good Friend marker.
2 Fenneko - Hufflepuff
Deadpan and downright hilarious, Fenneko exudes a cool and confident attitude. She tends to push her friends into pursuing what they want, helping both Retsuko and Haida throughout the series. She has a certain grudge against Tsunoda, but it’s really because she sees through Tsunoda’s “nice girl” phoniness. Despite her outward attitude, Fenneko seems like a good fit for Hufflepuff!
1 Retsuko - Slytherin
Our protagonist is actually pretty easy to sort. She’s smart, clever, has a lot of ambition, and after Season 1, isn’t a big pushover anymore. She has a lot of agency in Season 2 and actively starts to take control of her life.
Plus, of course, there’s the immense rage she lets out in private. She’s gotta be a Slytherin!