Many followers look at 90 Day Fiancé star Larissa Dos Santos Lima’s Instagram and assume she’s living the influencer dream, but a new post reveals that she’s been struggling. Larissa has had a long and tumultuous journey on the franchise, and now it seems like she’s not happy with where she has ended up. In her latest note to fans, Larissa goes into detail about the difficult and disappointing time she’s had in America, and it’s clear she misses home.

Larissa was first introduced on 90 Day Fiancé as Colt Johnson’s fiery Brazilian fiancé, but things quickly fell apart once she got to the States. Her marriage with Colt crumbled, and now she’s in a relationship with Eric Nichols. Larissa and Eric have also had a rocky relationship, but recently the couple celebrated their two-year anniversary. Though Larissa appeared on 90 Day Fiancé and multiple seasons of Happily Ever After, she and TLC have since parted ways—right around the time Larissa and Eric moved to Colorado Springs. But Larissa apparently isn’t loving her new home.

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In her emotional new Instagram story, Larissa goes into detail about the “avalanche of events” that have pushed her past her breaking point. She reveals that after being arrested by Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), she had her passport taken away and is required to stay in Colorado, which has become a problem for her. “I’m dying everyday,” she says. “I’m stuck in Colorado Springs, cold, gray sky.” Larissa claims she moved to Colorado Springs to film more content for TLC but was fired the day before she was set to move.

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Larissa is clearly missing her tropical home in Brazil and goes into great detail about how much the Colorado winter is getting her down. “At this point I just wish I could see the SUN, WARM not Colorado Springs fake cold sun,” she says, adding that although she’s tried to pretend she likes it in Colorado, it’s all been a lie. She’s mentioned before that she doesn’t enjoy living in Colorado, but this is a whole new level. “[I'm] never gonna wake up and see the sun again,” she laments, saying she’s “utterly disappointed” and “utterly regret[s]” leaving Brazil. 

In recent months, Larissa has had to deal with a lot. She mentions in the post that she was fired by TLC, arrested by ICE, went to court, can’t leave the state of Colorado and now, from the sound of things, dealing with severe seasonal affective disorder (SAD). SAD is a mental disorder that is dictated by seasons (usually winter) that can lead to feelings of depression and hopelessness. In her post, Larissa repeatedly mentions how cold and gray Colorado is and how much she misses the sun and heat of Brazil, which indicates that this winter is really getting to her.

If the 90 Day Fiancé star is dealing with seasonal depression, it could explain some of her recent explosive and questionable behavior. It’s not surprising that she would miss Brazil, especially considering the harsh winter conditions in Colorado that she is not used to. Many viewers think the foreigners in the franchise will do anything for a U.S. green card, but Larissa’s experience shows that she’s proud of where she comes from and gave up a lot to pursue love in a different country. It’s just a shame that it doesn’t seem to be working out in Larissa’s favor.

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Source: Larissa Lima/Instagram