Group dates have been a part of The Bachelorette and The Bachelor since the beginning, but it is time for the show to put a stop to these outings. With its two-lead format featuring Rachel Recchia and Gabby Windey, The Bachelorette season 19 has been particularly problematic when it comes to group dates. As the women separated the larger pool of men into two exclusive groups, the awkwardness and hypocrisy of the group dates have become even more apparent.
On a Bachelor or Bachelorette group date, the contestants accompany the lead as he or she gets to know them in a group setting. The dates usually require the contestants to participate in an activity, which then leads into an after-party during which a group date rose is awarded to the person who made a lasting impression throughout the day. During the date, the contestants may try to carve out some alone time with the lead, whisking him or her away in order to have a heart-to-heart talk or to steal a kiss.
As the Bachelor and Bachelorette contestants participate in the date, they are forced to watch the woman or man to whom they might become engaged within a few weeks interact with other people romantically, which creates jealousy and drama among them. On the other hand, in the past, the Bachelorette sometimes has felt ignored by the men who were more interested in hanging out with each other on their group dates rather than the woman herself. Rachel and Gabby's season in particular has been a strong example of why The Bachelorette should stop subjecting the contestants to group dates.
There Are Too Many Men On The Bachelorette Group Dates
After Rachel was upset that Logan Palmer switched from her group to Gabby's, she decided to cancel her group date with Tino Franco, James "Meatball" Clarke, Ethan Kang, Tyler Norris, and Zach Shallcross in Bruges, Belgium. Tino was especially upset and hurt by this because he had experienced an incredibly romantic one-on-one date with Rachel in Paris the week before. He told Rachel that he felt unseen by her. In his confessional, he said that now he would miss out on the chance to explore Bruges with his future wife. In the real world, Tino calling Rachel his future wife would be viewed as promising and passionate, but, when Bachelorette viewers really think about what Tino's date would actually be like with four other guys there, it also seems a bit ridiculous. Similarly, there are some men who have not yet had a one-on-one date with Rachel or Gabby, and their only time spent with them has been in a setting with multiple other guys. As they get closer to the end of the show, it seems impossible that they could consider marrying someone with whom they have only gotten to know in a group setting.
The Bachelorette Group Dates Have Been Degrading
As in the past, on this season of The Bachelorette, the men had several group dates that raised some eyebrows. The first one was a talent competition in which the men had to perform in speedos. Also, on one of Rachel's group dates, the men had to engage in a series of tasks to seduce her, including asking them to kiss their own hands to demonstrate their skills and having her sniff their armpits in order for her to connect with their pheromones. On one of Gabby's group dates, the men slapped each other in their faces with raw fish. Although the men felt uncomfortable on these dates, they tried to be good sports about them. However, trying to woo a woman in front of several other guys in an uncomfortable, and, in some instances, degrading situation makes viewers wonder if the show has lost sight of its goal of the leads being there to find husbands. In the real world, a man would never have to endure things such as these in order to win someone's heart. Many fans have also pointed out that, if the roles were reversed, there would be outrage about women being subjected to such things.
The Bachelorette Group Date Rose Should Be Eliminated
On The Bachelorette over the years, the women have criticized the men who seem to be there just to "win" the show, but who are not really there for the right reasons. However, expecting the lead to hand out a group date rose in front of all of the other guys does make it feel more like a reality competition show than a dating show with the goal of finding a husband. The Bachelorette often makes a speech about each guy and how he performed throughout the date, building suspense as to which man will receive the rose. As she hands it out like a trophy, the other guys feel disappointed and second-best. The group date rose is a very unnatural way for the Bachelorette to let someone know that she cares about him.
The Bachelorette Looks Like A Hypocrite
Although Rachel and Gabby's season is all about them taking back their power after how they were treated by Clayton Echard on his season of The Bachelor, the group dates are making the women look like hypocrites. Rachel and Gabby have both repeatedly said that they want to feel seen by their suitors, but they have made the men feel unwanted through their actions on the group dates. In the real world, women sometimes date more than one man at a time, but not literally on the same night in the same place. When Rachel says that she feels unseen and does not feel special, but then her actions have the unintended consequence of making the men feel the same way, she appears hypocritical. This is especially true on this season of The Bachelorette when some of the men have expressed that they are torn between Rachel and Gabby. Although it is painful to watch Rachel upset that a man would choose Gabby over her, the strangeness of the format of the show is highlighted when viewers realize that Rachel is doing the exact same thing to every guy in her group because they believe that she could be falling in love with them and she is torn about them. Of course, this has been true for every other Bachelor and Bachelorette as well. Although people should know by now that this is the nature of the show, and Rachel and Gabby of course are not doing anything wrong by following it, the group dates emphasize how bizarre the format really is. The Bachelorette's happiness with her future husband should not come at the expense of the other men.
In the future, The Bachelorette should put a stop to group dates and instead focus on the one-on-one dates. When the lead can spend some quality alone time with one of the men, she can explore the relationship in a more natural way. In the real world, women do not go on dates with multiple men at the same time, causing so much unnecessary drama. On Bachelor in Paradise, there are no group dates. Instead, the contestants get to know each other on a deeper level, which could be why the format leads to so many more successful relationships. Of course, they make good television, but if The Bachelorette is seriously committed to helping women find their future husbands, then the group date should become a thing of the past.
The Bachelorette airs Mondays at 8 p.m. EST on ABC.