The Avengers of TV: Television’s 10 Mightiest Heroes

Published 2 years ago by , Updated May 4th, 2012 at 8:11 pm, This is a list post.

The Avengers of TV: Television's Mightiest Heroes

The Avengers of TV The Avengers isn't the only team that could defend Earth. In fact, we've assembled 10 of television's mightiest heroes to take on Loki and his army. And guess what? They won. Why? Because I said so… and this is all pretend anyway. So to celebrate the theatrical release of The Avengers, it's time to kick back, relax, and check out The Avengers of TV. *Don't forget to check out the photo of the complete team at the end.

Walter White - 'Breaking Bad'

The Avengers of TV: Walter White (portrayed by: Brian Cranston) Age: 52 Species: Human Occupation:Car Wash Owner (cough) Abilities: Chemical Expert, Narcotic Expert, Expert Strategist, Superior Intelligence Nemesis: Gustavo "Gus" Fring Special Abilities: Making People Do What He Wants (No Matter What), Sh*t Doesn't Phase Him Avengers Classification: Nick Fury It takes a special kind of someone to be able to wrangle these personalities, and there's no one better at making people do what he wants them to do, without knowing it, than Walter White. Sure, there may be some "problems" here and there if you don't go along with him, but when push comes to shove, he's going to know how to take down Loki, his army AND Loki's drug supplier all in one foul swoop. What? A man has to make a living.

The Doctor - 'Doctor Who'

The Avengers of TV: The Doctor (portrayed by: Matt Smith) Age: 1103 Species: Time Lord Occupation: N/A Abilities: Expert Strategist, Expert Negotiator, Demon Expert, Monster Expert, Alien Expert, Weapons Expert, Superior Intelligence, Regenerative Abilities (limited), Combat Expert  Nemesis: The Master Special Abilities: Sonic Screwdriver, Bow Tie, Fez Avengers Classification: Iron Man (Tony Stark) A galactic bachelor at dual-heart, the Doctor has many loves in his life – and for whatever reason, Earth is on the top of his list. Having previously saved the world numerous times already, the only thing that Loki and his army makes the Doctor do is laugh while adjusting his bowtie. With Sonic screwdriver in hand, the only thing that will slow the Doctor down is wood. The Doctor's warning: "You are not the first to have come here. Oh, there have been so many. And what you've got to ask is, what happened to them?"

Dean Winchester - 'Supernatural'

The Avengers of TV: Dean Winchester (portrayed by: Jensen Ackles) Age: 34 Species: Human Occupation: Hunter Abilities: Combat Expert, Weapons Expert, Monster Expert, Demon Expert, Master of Disguise, Vehicle Expert, Experienced Strategist Nemesis: Richard 'Dick' Roman Special Abilities: Can See Fairies, Difficulty Staying Dead, Friends in "High" Places Avengers Classification: Steve Rogers (Captain America) Having grown up fighting every monster and demon known (and unknown) to man, Dean Winchester is a born avenging machine. On top of that, he has died three times, yet is still alive. Guess what, Loki? Dean has seen Heaven and Hell. So when he starts tearing through the army you sent, Dean will be nice of enough to ask you where you'd like him to send them. …unless the only option he gives you is "up your a**."

Eric Northman - 'True Blood'

The Avengers of TV: Eric Northman (portrayed by: Alexander Skarsgard) Age: 1,100+ Species: Vampire Occupation: Vampire Sheriff, Owner of Fangatsia Abilities: Vampire Powers, Combat Trained, Weapons Trained, Monster Expert Nemesis: Russell Edgington Special Abilities: Holds Grudges, Super Blood Avengers Classification: Thor Odinson The eldest of the group, Eric Northman has eaten the best and worst of humanity - so Loki is nothing more than just an oddly seasoned alien kabob to him. Sure, he may have problems in the sunlight, but so do many people. With no time to be prejudice about complexion, we'll have to deal with Eric's nighttime needs somehow. Good thing this group has three scientists in it. How many scientists does your group have, Loki?  Yeah, just ugly dudes… that's what I thought.

Josh Levinson - 'Being Human'

The Avengers of TV: Josh Levinson (portrayed by: Sam Huntington) Age: 30 Species: Lycanthrope Occupation: Hospital Orderly Abilities: Lycanthrope Transformation, Superior Strength (during that time of the month), Regenerative Healing, Heightened Senses, Superior Speed Nemesis: Full Moons Special Abilities: Expert Worrier Avengers Classification: The Hulk (Bruce Banner) The most reluctant of the group, Josh's full powers don't come out until a full moon, but that doesn't mean he's not strong as hell otherwise. Making use of his heightened strength near a full moon, Josh could easily toss around Loki's army. Of course, if we happen to need him to go full werewolf, that won't be a problem. You see, Josh has this secret… It's always a full moon.

Nikita Mears - 'Nikita'

The Avengers of TV: Nikita (portrayed by: Maggie Q) Age: 30 Species: Human Occupation: Revenge Abilities: Combat Expert, Weapons Expert, Expert Marksman, Expert Assassin, Explosives Expert, Master of Disguise, Master Spy NemesisDivision Special Abilities: Combat Expert, Weapons Expert, Expert Marksman, Explosives Expert, Master of Disguise, Master Spy Avengers Classification: Black Widow (Natasha Romanoff ) One of the most deadly assassins in the world, Nikita was raised to be an ass-kicking machine. Proving that point by kicking the ass of the "machine" that created her, this sultry femme fatale only has one weakness… deep-voiced men. Sorry Loki!

Raylan Given - 'Justified'

The Avengers of TV: Raylan Givens (portrayed by: Timothy Olyphant) Age: 43 Species: Human Occupation: Federal Marshall Abilities: Combat Expert, Handgun Expert, Expert Marksman, Expert Strategist, Expert Negotiator Nemesis: TBD (depending on the day) Special Abilities: Pulling (Don't Make Him Pull) Avengers Classification: Hawkeye (Clint Barton) A lawman at heart, Raylan Givens can't just let Loki and his army invade the planet without having SOMEONE from the law enforcement community showing up to let him know that planet invasion is kind of illegal here. He may not know – this could just all be one big miscommunication. Oh, it's not? I guess it's time to pull then.

Temperance Brennan - 'Bones'

The Avengers of TV: Temperance Brennan (portrayed by: Emily Deschanel) Age: 35 Species: Human Occupation: Forensic Anthropologist Abilities: Combat Expert, Weapons Trained, Expert Marksman, Expert Strategist, Superior Intelligence, Superior Wealth Nemesis: Christopher Pelant Special Abilities: Fitted Wonder Woman Costume (limited use), Proficient Akonting Player Avengers Classification: Wasp (Janet Van Dyne) A lady of science, with fists of fury, Brennan is what we like to call our "secret weapon" of the group. While it's true that she won't be able to take on Loki alone, there's no doubt that Brennan could handle her own if Loki's army decides to bust into the Jeffersonian while she's working. What's she working on, you ask? Oh, just her new book, her upcoming movie, her current FBI case, her stacks of unidentified remains AND figuring out how to easily make waste of your army. ALL WHILE maintaining a healthy relationship (finally) AND raising a child. Why did she put your army last, Loki? I don't really want to get into this, but she said something about your civilization not being as advanced as you said you were, and that it's actually quite simple to defeat you guys.

Walter Bishop - 'Fringe'

The Avengers of TV: Walter Bishop

(portrayed by: John Noble) Age: 64 Species: Human Occupation: Owner of Massive Dynamic, Scientist Abilities: Superior Intelligence, Chemical Expert, Genetic Expert, Expert Strategist, Fringe Science Expert Nemesis: David Robert Jones Special Abilities: LSD, Root Beer Float, and Blue Cotton Candy Expert Avengers Classification: Doctor Strange (Stephen Strange) Does this one really need to be explained? Walter Bishop took Leonard Nimoy and put him in Olivia's head, and then turned him into a cartoon… which Walter joined in on. I've never seen the Enterprise do that, have you? Yeah, Walter Bishop may not have the brawn of the group, but he certainly has a majority of the brains. Well, except for those parts that were taken out. But he wanted them taken out, so that doesn't really count. What counts is that with a single cow, some LSD and a sensory deprivation tank, we could have this whole Loki thing figured out quickly. What's that, Walter? Kill Loki with rainbows? Okay, yeah… we're going to need some more LSD.

Dexter Morgan - 'Dexter'

The Avengers of TV: Dexter Morgan (portrayed by: Michael C. Hall) Age: 35 Species: Human Occupation: Blood Spatter Analyst Abilities: Combat Expert, Chemical Expert, Expert Strategist, Master of Disguise, Expert Locksmith  Nemesis: Dark Passenger Special Abilities: Dark Passenger Onboard Avengers Classification: Ant-Man (Henry Pym) Dexter Morgan, what are you doing here? Did you get that whole weird sexual thing with your sister (but not sister) worked out? Is She okay? Yeah, I mean it was weird for me watch, I can only imagine what it was like for you. Oh, I am so sorry… I didn't even notice that you had someone all plastic wrapped up here. Who is that? Loki?! How did you end up here? How is that plastic wrap holding you? Oh, it's a joke! Haha, good one, Loki. …but seriously, Dexter is standing behind you with a BIG needle. Yeah, Northman is there with him. I know, right? F'n Northman.

The Avengers of TV: Television's Mightest Heroes

The Avengers of TV Sure, we may have needed a few extra characters to help make the match even, but I think the world will once again be safe from invading forces. Well, until the sequel gets a release date. …and when that happens, The Avengers of TV will be back. Why? Because we'll need them to return. **You can check out the full-sized photo of The Avengers of TV by clicking HERE.**
TAGS: being human, bones, breaking bad, dexter, doctor who, fringe, justified, nikita, supernatural, the avengers, true blood

47 Comments

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  1. Dr. Who can kick their butts all by himself. Yes, he’s that badass.

    • And should be Thor… Alien, space traveller, etc. A Vampire is not Thor and is more like Iron Man because a Vampire is made just like Iron Man made himself.

      Oh yeah, and he’s very badass.

  2. ironically enough, jensen ackles and alexander skarsgard were both in the running to play cap and thor respectively. so these guesses are pretty spot on.

    • Yeap, part of the reason we chose them that way :)

      • If I’m thinking right, wasn’t Jensen actually the top choice for Cap, until Supernatural was picked up for a Season 6?

        • Director Joe Johnston has claimed that Chris Evans was always his first choice; all of the others were only tested in case Evans wouldn’t take it.

      • I see what you did thar. :D

  3. Funny list but personally I would have switched the Captain America and Hawkeye choices. I know Raylan is probably the better shot but attitude wise Dean fits better.

  4. Wow… kinda desperate idea for an article, don’t you think? :) Should’ve included John Reese in there.

    • Definitely Reese.

  5. No Jack Bauer? A man who could put down all the Avengers, die, fight off an army, die again and not go to the toilet for days on end? He’s a superhero.

    Also, Jensen would have been a great Cap.

    • One of the rules was that the TV show has to currently be on the air.

      • Ah.

        But the point still stands lol.

        • Point has fallen. ;-)

  6. They forgot Link Hayes from the Mod Squad!

  7. Uhhmmmmmmm…..nooooooo..

  8. Here’s a direct link to the full-sized image: http://cdn.screenrant.com/wp-content/uploads/the-avengers-of-tv-full.jpg

  9. lmao

  10. Definitely should have included Reese.

  11. nikita is so bad ass

  12. Patrick Jane/The Mentalist-Loki. He is intelligent, and can control others with hypnosis.

    • Uh screw that, you should have the original Shawn Spencer if you are going to have anyone. Rip off.

      • ditto

  13. the american being human? really?

    • I was going to say the same thing, haha.

  14. Where is Jack Bauer ?

  15. I don’t even want to know why you didn’t include Michael Westen.

    • Or Sam Axe, for that matter! We need a Agent Coulson type, don’t we?

  16. to be fair the doctor wouldn’t need anyone else to help, he could take down loki and his army all by himself!

  17. I love Dr Who but come on… even someone as awesome as the Doctor can’t beat the Hulk ;)

    • *Edit: “…even someone as awesome as the Doctor can’t beat Loki and his army – Hulk can’t even beat Loki’s army on his own”

      • Not sure how much Doctor Who you have watched, but The Doctor has indeed defeated armies on his own: the Daleks and Cybermen to name just a couple. The Doctor could probably even figure out how to “cure” the Hulk.

        • I watch a LOT of Dr Who… a LOT ;)
          But yeah, on second thought, I guess you’re right – the Doctor is just THAT awesome.

          • They do seem to cut away a lot though.

            Doctor running away.

            *cut*

            Doctor wins.

  18. Great thinking sir…These guys should’ve featured in the MOVIE !!! :D

  19. nossa o doutor who

    • You’re Pedro?

      Sh*t, now I have to change my name!!

      ;)

  20. EXCELLENT

  21. Where is Sherlock?(BBC) He is the ultimate Avenger! The list is incomplete without him.

  22. And hey, look, no Spartacus !

  23. Damon from the Vampire Diaries would also be good on this list. he is badass like Eric.

  24. Walter White can’t be on The TV Avengers. He’s a villain. Didn’t you guys see Season 4?

  25. DEAN WINCHESTER ALL THE WAY!!!!!!!

  26. No Sylar from Heroes? To bad =(

  27. Number 5 should be Russell Tovey instead as the original British version is so much better.

  28. Yes, Sylar is needed :)

  29. good thinking…these guys should’ve featured in the MOVIE !!!

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