‘Machete Kills’ Trailers Tease Robert Rodriguez’ Sequel in English and Spanish

Published 1 year ago by

Machete is a full-length treatment of Robert Rodriguez’ faux-trailer – made for his and Quentin Tarantino’s Grindhouse double-feature – and celebrates the ridiculous exploitation fare of yore, in the form of an ultra-violent Mexploitation (i.e. “Mexican exploitation”) film. That the sequel, Machete Kills, looks even more ridiculous, is a testament to Rodriguez and his cast’s level of dedication to their cause.

The above Machete Kills trailer opens with an introduction – by Rodriguez and his leading man Danny Trejo – which, like the narration in that preview, is presented in Spanish.

Seeing how the English-language version (embedded below) doesn’t make the plot any clearer: Machete Kills features Trejo back in the role of the eponymous blade-wielding, non-Texting (warning: NSFW link!), ex-Federale. He is recruited by the President of the United States – portrayed by Charlie Sheen, who is now going by his real name (Carlos Irwin Estévez) – in order to stop a madman (Mel Gibson) who has plans to spread anarchy across the globe.

As the trailer(s) illustrate, Trejo’s female costars in Machete Kills include Jessica Alba and Michelle Rodriguez – back as, respectively, the no-nonsense Sartana and one-eyed badass Luz – in addition to new additions like Lady Gaga as the golden-haired La Chameleón, Amber Heard as the blonde (and tenacious) Miss San Antonio, and Sofía Vergara as Madame Desdemona. (Three guess as to what sort of “firepower” the Modern Family star in packing.)

machte kills trailer Machete Kills Trailers Tease Robert Rodriguez Sequel in English and Spanish

Many critics and moviegoers alike enjoyed Machete for what it was (a piece of dirty and silly entertainment to the core), while others felt that Rodriguez’ movie exercise in modern exploitation was too much of a juvenile and – more importantly – kitschy pastiche for its own good.

Suffice it to say, the movie’s odd casting selections and cartoonish plot – in combination with the campy tone and grindhouse-throwback style of the trailer footage – suggests that Machete Kills will only push people even further into one of those two camps of thought.

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Machete Kills opens in U.S. theaters on September 13th, 2013.

Source: Yahoo! Movies

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TAGS: machete, Machete Kills

31 Comments

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  1. Sofia Vergara? Por favor y gracias!

  2. This movie is gonna be crazy!!

  3. Haha!!!
    I won’t see this in the theater but I’ll rent it the 1st day it hits Blu-ray.
    I can appreciate the argument that these movies are quite dumb and cater to the lowest common denominator but that’s fine with me. I love dark dramas, in-depth character studies or thought provoking Sci-Fi just as much if not more than the next person but on occasion I just want to be entertained for 90 minutes and that’s what Machete is.

  4. A 5′ 7″ in boots machete wielding soon to be 70 year old with
    one frozen facial expression does not an intimidating figure make.
    Which is altogether fitting for a movie one should not take seriously.

    • You just don’t get it man.

      • If you mean I don’t take this seriously I don’t.
        Getting it means not to take this seriously.

  5. Good looking bad movie is a flop

  6. this is gonna be crazier then the first one.

  7. I hope Marko Zaror gets a decent amount of screen time to show his crazy martial arts skills and doesn’t get killed on his first scene.

  8. Machete MATA! cabrones!

  9. Sorry, but my only memory of him is in Breaking Bad at the moment, haha.

  10. Yes…this movie is everything I ever wanted. YESSSSSS.

  11. I can’t wait for this.

  12. CAN’T WAIT

  13. no Alexa Vega in the trailer? sad day…

  14. Eyes will roll!!

    The first one was acceptable, mindless violence, but there is just no need for a sequel!! Everyone has moved on from bloody grindhouse, even Tarrantino has had two movies out since then which says it all!!

    Why is Rodriguez still wasting his time on this crap? Sort ya life out mate!

    • Rodriguez isn’t wasting his time. Between him and Tarnatino he’s the only one who’s sorted his life out by streamlining two sequels each for Machete and Sin City, a fourth El Mariachi and his own cable network. While Tarantino is still whining about his filmography and retiring.

      I don’t care if you don’t like Rodriguez but there’s no need to slander him when you don’t know what you’re talking about

      Also as much as I love Tarantino, at least Rodriguez is consistently good with his action movies unlike Tarantino who’s never been able to recapture his Pulp Fiction magic

  15. Looks fun! I’ve always liked Danny Trejo. He usually plays a one note character but when you look that badass it’s okay.

  16. I’ve never had so much fun seeing a movie with friends as I did when I saw Machete. That movie was amazing. Literally didn’t stop laughing the entire time at how ridiculous it was. Probably looking forward to the sequel more than anything else besides Man of Steel

  17. My type of film. Can’t wait to watch!!

  18. Jessica Alba AND Sofia Vergara, two of the worst actresses in history, finally together in a movie. Seems fitting that it’s in one of Robert Rodriguez’s trash attempts.

    • :D

  19. CAN’T WAIT TO SEE THIS !!!!

  20. Awesome Can’t wait….

  21. Robert Rodriguez, not unlike Guillermo del Toro, showed extraordinary promise as an uncommon filmmaker with DESPERADO that peaked with SIN CITY.

    Regrettably, Rodriguez lost control of screen violence, selling his goods with grindhouse cinema pretension. His films visually arresting yet empty — but for a genre-specific metaphor or symbolism — represent (post-SIN CITY) a reliable director with a staggeringly unreliable oeuvre, both obtuse and banal.

    Whatever promise he once showed is now unpersuasive.

  22. The only time you ever see Lady Gaga used in a cool way in the movies..mebbbe?

  23. We need more movies with Mel Gibson. He is a great actor and director. Too bad his anti-Jew rant pretty much ruin his career. his last movie “Get the Gringo” was a good action movie. I highly recommend watching it.

    • Oh please!
      Mad Max and Lethal Weapon would have still been good without him

  24. I like Robert Rodriguez films so long as he runs and stays away from the Norm, and stop trying to please the blocker buster crowds with traditional b*******!keep your artist framework, most art is not liked untill the creator is long dead however his films will have very few who really like them, ….R.G.

  25. Rodriguez is a no talent hack that likes to make racist films

  26. Seriously? There’s gonna be a screening in Spanish?
    What happened to the good old days were we just arrested these a$$h0les?

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