After two weeks, it’s finally over. The last proverbial nail has been put in the coffin of everyone’s favorite ginger-haired talk show host, as NBC and Conan O’Brien have released a “joint statement” showing you that no matter who you are, NBC has no problem screwing you over… unless you’re the one that pushed Johnny Carson out, stole The Tonight Show from David Letterman, gave it away and then stole it back again from Conan O’Brien.

All while never spending a penny of the money you’ve earned… (Keep bragging about that, Jay, there’s no way that statement won’t make people resent you.)


NBC and Conan O’Brien have reached a resolution of the issues surrounding O’Brien’s contract to host “The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien.”

Under terms of an agreement that was signed earlier today, NBC and O’Brien will settle their contractual obligations and the network will release O’Brien from his contract, freeing him to pursue other opportunities after September 1, 2010.

O’Brien will make his final appearance as host of “The Tonight Show” on January 22.

So, this is how it ends. A short statement so bland and humorless that you know it was either written by someone from NBC… or one of Leno’s writers. At least this gives Conan the ability to go to other networks. The one thing I’m curious about is whether Conan’s intellectual property is included in the final agreement.

If not, expect to see Triumph The Insult Comic Dog on Leno with a different voice and horrible jokes. Then when someone calls Jay out for lifting one of Conan’s bits we can all listen to him lie and tells us how Steven Allen used to run around with a plastic dog on his hand back in the 60’s.

With the big chin gone from the 10 O’clock spot, there is now room for real programs to take his place. And since NBC canceled any show that could be put in that spot (cough – Southland – cough) they’re relying on their current stock of shows by ordering more their Thursday night comedies (Community, Parks and Recreation, The Office, 30 Rock). Tell me, how good is Chuck looking now, Mr. Peacock?

The question is… do I really care? Not really. Sure, NBC completely screwed over Conan and I know Jay had more to do with it than the passive-aggressive skunk-haired host will ever admit, but when it comes down to it, I’m fine with whatever happens.

That means I’d also be fine if Comcast tore through NBC, ripping the entire network apart since the only reason they bought it in the first place was for the actual, physical, cable lines.

…Just don’t touch USA or SyFy. Please.

Now that everything is said and done, signed and sealed, are you ready to get back to your normal days without having to hear about Jay Leno or Conan O’Brien, or are you sad that this conclusion will the bring to an end the recent “edgy” material and sucker-punches the late-night hosts have been giving each other lately?

Make sure to turn into The Tonight Show this Friday to say goodbye to Conan and then never turn in again.

Or, if you must, you can catch The Tonight Show (with Jay Leno) starting March 1 @11:35PM on NBC and catch Conan O’Brien not being able to work until September 1.

Source: NBC