Soap operas are known for being outlandish and at times, unbelievable. It’s what makes them so fun to watch. Amnesia, long lost siblings and characters never really staying dead are all hallmarks of daytime drama. However, in the middle of all the craziness, we do need a few small things to still make sense.
As TV’s longest-running soap opera, General Hospital has had its share of surprising super couples, characters returning with new faces and even a visit from an actual alien. Though we’re happy to stick with it through all of that, there is some weird stuff that bothers us from time to time, so these are 10 things that make no sense about General Hospital.
KEVIN HAS BEEN SECRETLY TREATING HIS SERIAL KILLER BROTHER RYAN
Psychiatrist Kevin Collins came to town to help capture his serial killer twin Ryan Chamberlain. Everything came to an end when Ryan was seemingly killed in an explosion. Turns out Ryan wasn’t really gone, as viewers discovered Kevin had been secretly treating him for years.
Unfortunately, Ryan switched places with Kevin, escaped and went on another killing spree. We just never bought that Ryan would keep this aspect of his life secret from his best friends Mac and Felicia, and his wife Laura. Despite actor Jon Lindstrom’s great performance, it was implausible based on what we knew of the character.
SONNY AND JASON HAVE TERRIBLE SECURITY
Sonny Corinthos and Jason Morgan are the most powerful mobsters on the east coast, and have been running Port Charles for years. This means they live with a huge amount of security. Bodyguards, bulletproof windows, and several safe houses around town.
With all this and more in place, we can’t understand how the two continue to get shot. Yes, they lead dangerous lives, but considering all the precautions they take, we wouldn’t expect it to happen as often as it does. Perhaps they need to think about some new security protocols.
THE CRIMINAL JUSTICE SYSTEM IS COMPLETELY INEPT
Fun fact: almost no one in Port Charles is ever actually sent to prison. Sure, the police arrest people and they go to trial, but there’s always some technicality or crazy loophole that keeps them from being convicted.
Unless they get a suspect to confess, the police and district attorney have a hard time getting convictions. Even when the crime was committed in plain sight in front of half the town, there’s always a way around it. On the off chance that someone is actually sent to prison, they usually end up escaping.
SONNY AND JASON ARE THE REAL HEROES
One of the longest-running storylines in General Hospital is the mob. Since the ‘80s, the mob has been intertwined in Port Charles, however in the ‘90s, Sonny Corinthos became the star of the show and the mob became central to everything.
When Jason Morgan got amnesia and left his family to work for Sonny, the two developed into the heroes of the series. When people in town have serious problems, they don’t go to the cops, they call Jason and Sonny. Considering how inefficient the PCPD is, this actually makes perfect sense.
EVERYONE CAN AFFORD THE METRO COURT
It’s common on soaps for there to be only one or two of any profession or establishment. For example, there’s only one lawyer in town, or one restaurant that everyone goes to. In Port Charles, the one hotel everyone stays at is the Metro Court, which is super fancy, and probably expensive.
This has us wondering how everyone who comes to town has enough money to stay there. No matter what their job is, or what’s going on in their lives, people somehow manage to afford an extended stay at one of the nicest hotels on the east coast.
PEOPLE KEEP FALLING IN LOVE WITH SONNY AND CARLY
Every soap has a supercouple, who no matter how many times they break up, we all know they’ll eventually get back together. On General Hospital that couple is Sonny and Carly. They’ve been married four times over the course of 20 years, with their lives always ending up intertwined.
Despite the roller coaster that is their relationship, there’s no one else that can understand the other the way they do. Since everyone in town knows this, it shocks us every time someone decides they’re the one who can come between the supercouple.
DRASTICALLY DIFFERENT AGES OF ALL THE KIDS IN TOWN
When summer comes around and elementary aged kids suddenly become teenagers, fans don’t even question it anymore. Soap opera rapidly aging syndrome (or SORAS) is just another part of watching daytime dramas.
The only time it really becomes a problem is when some of the kids are aged and others aren’t. This is particularly glaring in Port Charles, where Joss and Cam are teenagers, while Spencer and Emma remain much younger. The age gap makes no sense, seeing as we saw all these characters play together as little kids. Joss and Spencer even had scenes together a while ago and it was just weird.
ROBERT SCORPIO IS THE DISTRICT ATTORNEY
Robert Scorpio is a long running character who we’ve always known as a cop and a spy. He pops in occasionally to help his daughter Robin or ex-wife Anna with a problem. Recently, we found out he was also a lawyer and has been appointed Port Charles’ new district attorney.
With his brother Mac once again the police commissioner, it will be nice to know justice will finally be served. Until he mentioned it, we didn’t even know Robert had an interest in the law. This was a random plot viewers are finding it hard to buy.
NO ONE MOVES OUT OF THE QUARTERMAINE MANSION
As one of the core families of Port Charles, the Quartermaines have always been central to General Hospital. Through four generations we’ve been following their backstabbing shenanigans.
What we never understood was, with all the fighting and doublecrossing, no one ever moves out of the mansion. As a matter of fact, every time one of them gets married, someone else new moves in. Currently, Monica, adopted son Drew, grandson Michael, Ned and his wife Olivia, plus her young son all live there. At some point don’t these people want their own space or privacy?
DISCUSSING SECRETS ON THE DOCKS
Port Charles is a town full of secrets. Right now there are characters involved in a baby swap, maternity lie and shady cults. Weirdly, the one place where everyone goes to discuss all these secret plots is the docks.
The docks in Port Charles are wide open, with people constantly lurking around, so not really the best spot to work out illegal plans. That doesn’t seem to stop anyone in town, as so many secrets are discovered, because someone overheard something they weren’t supposed to down at the docks. Can’t they just get a room at the Metro Court?