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If ‘The Expendables’ Were Women

by Paul Young 
(12 of 11)

The Expendables hit theaters in 2010 in a screen-rattling, action-packed, explosive extravaganza. While The Expendables failed to impress some casual movie audiences and action fans, many thought it was just what the action-doctor ordered. The movie got us thinking... sometimes we tend to forget that there have been a long line of major butt-kicking ladies who not only get the job done, but do it looking sexy as hell. Jane Fonda in Barbarella, Uma Thurman in Kill Bill 1 & 2, Rhona Mitra in Doomsday and Underworld 3 - all these women knew how to whoop some major rear while still being completely feminine.

We at Screen Rant thought: “Who would we pick to be on our all female 'Expendables' team?” and let me tell you, I think we came up with a fantastic list. There may not be some of the newer action lady stars like Rosario Dawson (Death Proof), Zoe Bell (Whip It!), Emilie Ullerup (Sanctuary), Summer Glau (Firefly) or Eliza Dushku (Dollhouse) - but only because we wanted to find appropriate (age, popularity, etc.) counterparts to the male actors in The Expendables.
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  1. BeePoetic    4 months ago

    This list is Ok for the most part. Of course everyone would change a few here and there. I think for movie ticket sales you are going to have to incorporate old and new. My list of definites:

    Uma Thurman / Dolph Lundgren
    Michelle Rodriguez / Jason Statham
    Lucy Liu / Jet Li
    Milla Jovovich / Sylvester Stallone
    Queen Latifah / Terry Cruz
    Linda Hamilton / Chuck Norris
    Cynthia Rothrock / Jean-Claude Van Damme
    Kate Beckinsale / Randy Couture
    Demi Moore / Bruce Willis (had to do that)
    Lucy Lawless / Arnold Schwarzenegger

    And your bad female villain…

    Michelle Pfieffer

    Reply
    • Russ    2 months ago

      Actually, Zhang Ziyi would be a better complement to Jet Li. They both are awesome. She would be awesome in a “lady-centric” Expendables movie. Otherwise, spot on.

      Reply
    • Gregory    2 months ago

      Where is: Lena Headey/Sylwester Stallone
      Milla Jovovich/Jason Statham

      Reply
  2. Nick    4 months ago

    these female stars are big, but a female version of a male movie?

    It’s like trying to make a WOnder Woman Film/TV Show, it’s not possible.

    Reply
    • Shana    4 months ago

      It’s very possible!!!! When society tells us that women are somehow weak, inferior,etc… men and women alike believe it. Eventhough there are females everyday breaking the extreme bias stereotypes of “what it means to be a woman.” No man my size can dominate me just based on the fact he is a man… There is nothing a man can do that a female can’t do physically or mentally based on being a man or a woman. The ignorant superiority attitude that men have regarding women needs to end. Females are just as strong as any man… and no matter his size there is always something a woman can do to stand up against him. We are not weak!!!

      Reply
      • Qualia    4 months ago

        Hell yeah, Shana!
        I’ll second that!

        Reply
      • Frank    3 months ago

        Actually, males tend to be physically stronger, it’s one of the few differences between sexes. That’s why the “no hitting a girl” rule is there etc. BUT I agree that naturally assuming ALL men are stronger than ALL women is ridiculous, because I know some strong women that I’d have my work cut out for me in a scrap haha. I hope you know that most men like it when women are strong, like the women above, in fact we encourage it most of the time. I for one think this movie would not only be possible, but it very well could be even more badass than the original, especially with Milla Jovovich (one of THE biggest badasses in the world.).

        Anyway, tl;dr version, we know women aren’t weak, while men tend to be slightly stronger, it makes little to no difference, everyone is unique, and women need to be given a little more respect.

        Reply
    • Lorraine    4 months ago

      I’m not sure if you are aware that they DID make a Wonder Woman television show. Did fairly well too. Charlie’s Angels (tv and movie).

      Reply
  3. Jody    2 months ago

    I agree with most of the list. of course Angelina Jolie is a must! I would also need in there Genna Davis for long kiss goodnight…she is just awesome. Milla Jovovich is another that is a must. Linda Carter is also a nice touch.

    Reply
  4. David    5 days ago

    I must point out they also didn’t put in the fact Peeta lost his leg due to the injury from the mutant dog + cato + previous injuries from the group he was with… After all it’s a key fact for the beginning of the second book.

    Reply
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