[UPDATE: It's been announced that the new Iron Man trailer will be attached to 10,000 B.C. as well.]
I’m already prepared for the haters, the “hey man, can’t you just enjoy a #$#$%ing movie” commenters, and the “movie reviewers don’t know $#$#” crowd on this one. I think that 10,000 B.C. will be lame at best and laughable at worst.
Director Roland Emmerich has been wildly hit or miss with the movies he’s made. On the good side, he brought us the original Stargate movie, the fun popcorn flick Independence Day and the Mel Gibson movie The Patriot. On the other hand he’s also brought us Universal Soldier, Godzilla and The Day After Tomorrow.
Now call me crazy, but I think the latest news on this one supports my opinion of it. It’s being reported by various sources that not one but two trailers to movies that are very buzzworthy will be attached to 10,000 B.C. when it opens. The kind of trailers that are almost enough to drag people to see a movie just for the trailer itself.
Which trailers am I talking about?
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A new trailer for The Dark Knight and the first trailer for the Ed Norton-starring The Incredible Hulk.
Everyone is already excited beyond belief for The Dark Knight, and people are super-curious about The Incredible Hulk since there’s been almost no marketing of it so far. I think that the opportunity to see new trailers for both of these is a big draw.
I may be misreading this, but in my opinion this says that the studio feels it needs some extra “oomph” to get people to show up to see this movie. (I wonder what my buddy Chris over at Movie Marketing Madness would have to say about this).
To me, based on the movie trailer, it looks like a perfect contender for Mystery Science Theater 3000 if it was still around. The actors are too attractive, especially the babe in the film, the spoken English is too common (I don’t know what I’d expect… some sort of accent or something), and it just looks like an uber-CGI-fest.
Feel free to bookmark this post and come back after the movie opens to agree or tell me I was completely wrong. 
10,000 B.C. opens on March 7, 2008.
Source: JoBlo.com
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19 Comments
I couldn’t agree with you more. The only “potential” reason I’d go to this is the new HULK trailer that may or may not be attatched. This movie looks like a made for tv mini-series.
“Why so Serious!”
I’m predicting it’ll be a miss with this film.
It looks too serious to be fun, and too dumb to be an intellectual stimulator. It just feels no good all around and will be forgotten quickly.
Vic, how many uber-geeks are there who will decide to see a movie because of the trailers?
Hey Mystery Science Theater(or all the same guys at least) are still around. Just now they are called riff trax and instead they make fun of really popular movies.
All those Emmerich movies you mentioned I happen to like…even Universal Soldier. True, they’re not cinematic legacies, but they were entertaining and fun. Isn’t that what they were meant to be? I’m still not sure about this film and trailers will NOT drag me to a film-especially since I know they will be on here the next day.
Depending on the buzz, I might go check it out, but it sure seems like a rental already because the trailers have done NOTHING to get me interested in this film. As I pointed out in another comment somewhere, you only get ONE first impression….
Actually of all the Emmerich movies you listed, I only truly enjoyed Stargate. The only one I haven’t seen is Universal Soldier.
Independence Day was barely tolerable due mostly to the scenes of the Aliens attacking than for anything the rest of the movie did (which was laughable) while The Day After Tomorrow applied the same ham-fisted logic to global climate - with even duller results. The Patriot was okay, but it’s overly melodramatic plotting sucked the life out of what was otherwise a pretty good opening act.
Godzilla - rarely has a huge city stomping monster film managed to be so dreadfully dull and plodding. So unconcerned with the poor pacing were Devlin/Emmerich, that they still found time to retaliate against Siskel & Ebert for trashing (rightly) Independence Day.
Roland Emmerich is the master of taking epic scale material and wasting its potential with unfocused storytelling and laughable logic. Needless to say I’m not interested in his newest effort.
There are probably people who would be on the fence about seeing it and that might tip the scales to get them to go.
Vic
Big Elephants and little people. Weeeeee
^
I’m sure there’s a story but I’m no where near this film.
Wow Jersycajun we finnally agree on something.
^
Stargate could have been better bigtime but it was ok. (They should have stopped there).
But I totally agree that Emmerich is a hack beyond all hackyness.
^
Your post was a
perfect discription of his failures. I loved reading it.
Good job!
Well, I liked all those movies mentioned except for Godzilla (could someone call Megalon to beat the crap out of him LOL). I’m not too sure about 10000 BC myself; the trailers are not too appealing to me.
Heh, i knew this would have good previews. And when they said that we would expect Incredible Hulk previews in early march, my mind went straight to 10,000 bc.
Its kinda funny if they want me to see this film they wouldn’t tell me in the tv commercials that its from the producer of “Independance day” and “the day after tomarrow”…
^
I personally want to go see this film. But I must admit that the big dissapointment for me was seeing in the trailer that they speak english. I seriously doubt that english was around, or even spoken in 10,000 BC.
Well, Rotten Tomatoes’ critics seem to hate it; it’s at 9% on the tomato-meter.
Hey John I think Vic is going to have a review later today.
It’s now down to 8% at R/T.
Vic
Bac bac baack. SuperChicken!!!
^
I’m predicting a 2 star Vic rating.
I saw this movie and if you tend to take things overly seriously, I don’t recommend it. But if you respect classic legends from people of a time long before our own then I highly recommend it. Sometimes classics can seem stupid to those who have no respect.
I’m sorry but that makes no sense at all.
Vic
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